The Diary of a Nobody – Sun 6/24/2018

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Sunday, June 24
It is always good to come home…I pulled in a bit after 1200 after avoiding the big city and taking the back way home…This drive is always a treat, about 20 minutes longer but about the same mileage wise…It’s all two-lane road and there are a couple of 10,000-foot passes and whatnot and it sure beats the big city.

I’m relatively certain the cat was glad to see me…She was at the door and requested tummy rubs and pets and then she started meowing for her treasured canned yummies, which she hadn’t had for three whole days…Then I cleaned her cat box, which was about a day away from obliging her to crap on the floor and then I started in on the yard…The goddamned weed killer I sprayed had done some zero good…Every weed was still alive, mocking me as the grass around it was turning browner by the second…I started in on some hand watering, focusing on the brown areas…Then I watered the plants, the hanging plants and the apple tree and the iris and the rhubarb and then the indoor plants, and there a few of them, got watered.

The robins are still in residence and it does not appear the baby robins have hatched.

Then I laid down for a nap…I was tired and I had both the retailer and Hotel B later…Got a pretty good nap in, too, two solid hours, more or less, and every little bit helps when you live the graveyard lifestyle.

Steady at the retailer tonight and as soon as I reported for duty I was dispatched to my beloved Aisle 5 to relieve Jacki so she could resume training at the service desk…I got to use my hilarious “are those snacks or a meal plan” line a couple of times, including to two girls who came through with Cheez-Itz and cookies and some candy…They were pretty trim girls, too, so I quizzed them further:

How do you eat this and stay trim???…I’m gaining weight just looking at it.

This line got both smiles and chuckles, which it should…I mean, it’s hardly a Line of the Year candidate, but it’s not too bad, either.

Then this one kid tried to decline his $4.89 change…I couldn’t believe it, that’s nearly five bucks, which still has some value…It’s not unprecedented, but hardly common, for kids to decline the coin part of their change, 17 cents, or even 89 cents, not holding much value for them, but to decline this much was new…He tried to give it to me as a tip, which we aren’t allowed to receive, and I told him no, he more or less had to take it.

I got to Hotel B to find a stranger behind the front desk…Not only that, he was wearing a dress shirt and tie, too, which really keeps you on your toes…Turns out he’s Cory, a VP from the home office who actually has been in-house for a while, I just hadn’t met him yet because us night auditors are like trolls, nobody goes out of their way to see us unless forced to.

He was actually there for a while trying to square away Monday’s arrivals…The system says we are overbooked by six rooms, which is a lot for a 53-room hotel, but Cory insisted we weren’t and in the end he got everything squared away.

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 2300 Saturday night until 0615 Sunday…I slept really well and even took a PM and, frankly, I was surprised I didn’t sleep longer, but there I was, up feeling pretty good at exactly the time I needed to wake up to be out the door a bit before 0700.

There are not any weekly totals this week…Apologies are issued.

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.

The Diary of a Nobody was inspired by the 19th century British novel of the same name.

Read Gaylon’s latest: We The People: Making America America Again at www.GaylonKent.com

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