The Diary of a Nobody – Fri 6/22/2018

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Friday, June 22
Stanko is the slowest eater!!!

We are at lunch at the burger place we always go to when the convention is here…He got his usual fried pork sandwich (which he takes dry, by the by) and I got a burger and cheese curds and his was delivered before mine, well before mine because they forgot about me and when it finally was delivered it was cold…So I took it back and they handled it in good spirits and brought me new one, to include fresh cheese curds, and despite this head start I still finished way ahead of him…Not that it’s a race or anything, but if ol’ Sparrow entered a fast eating contest I would probably be in danger of winning.

This was after we took my car into a brake repair place…The brakes started making grinding noises on the way down and rather than wait to for the inconvenience and extra expense of taking care of it back home I took care of it here…This is one of the advantages of the big city and, in fact, they had it ready by mid-afternoon.

I accepted a 100 percent membership award on behalf of a post in my district, but neither my post nor district met our membership goals this year…Stanko got into, and lost, a pretty nice pissing contest with state over the numbers we were required to meet, and, honestly, they weren’t particularly reasonable, tho I did not get involved in the dispute at either the post or district level

I blew off the afternoon session of the Legion meeting and went to the Sons of the Legion meeting instead…Equally boring tho less crowded…I picked up a squadron handbook so Tim and I can go about getting our small town squadron up and running with some semblance of order and precision, and I got some membership applications as well, just in case…The meeting was fairly short…We adjourned at 1500 or so and I went back to the main hall to find it deserted…I am not making that up!!!…The main Legion meeting had already adjourned so I went to where we were sitting when we could be bothered to actually be in session and all my stuff was gone…I wasn’t too worried because plainly Stanko or Tina or Phil took it, but I had no idea where they were.

I later found them, in finest Legion tradition, in the bar, with my stuff, still together and not auctioned off to pay their tab…Phil is a pretty new member, a former Marine who is, and I am not making this up, planning to run across the country this fall…He will run two marathons a day for three months…Phil is insane.

I got nice and schnookered at the hospitality area last night…They also had a cheese board so I ate a lot, too, and this came after a steak dinner at Post 38…I was being held hostage by some old soldiers and they were talking about boring stuff when I spot an older gent wearing a hat that says Navy on it…I go up and say hi and his name is Ed and Ed was on the Hornet about the time I was born…Surrounded by soldiers and airman, we both appreciate the refuge offered by a fellow sailor…Later, Gary, an old anti-submarine cruiser sailor joins us, in case the army boys and girls want to make some noise…I’m drinking bourbon, Ed is drinking some hooch that has window cleaner as its base while Gary is drinking aviation fuel – straight – and we debate whether to show these lightweights what drinking really is but decide this isn’t the place for pillage and to go invading the pool looking for pufferfish.

I managed to forget packing only two things this trip, about average: my razor and socks…Good thing I started preparing for this trip a week ago or else who knows how many other things I’d’ve forgotten, like suits…The Wife, ever prepared, had a razor with her yesterday and I went and got some socks today.

 Sparrow’s Sleep Log: Today’s sleep log ran yesterday…I don’t know how this happened…Sleeping at night throwing me off…Apologies are issued.

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.

The Diary of a Nobody was inspired by the 19th century British novel of the same name.

Read Gaylon’s latest: We The People: Making America America Again at www.GaylonKent.com

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