The Diary of a Nobody/October 19

Q: Is it still Read Free Fortnight (RFF) at the site?
A: You bet it is, through October 26.

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Monday, October 19
Amy, as usual, had a pot of coffee made for me when I reported for duty and tonight she informed me she’d been altering it, making it a bit stronger than normal by putting a little bit extra in there in addition to the one package…(This explains the open package that’s been in the container on top of the coffee machine.)…Amy asked if I noticed and I was obliged to admit I hadn’t, but I am hardly a coffee snob…I’ve had some bad coffee in my time and you might think that would make you appreciate the good stuff, but you’d be wrong, it merely killed my taste for the good stuff…Hot, black and caffeinated is what’s important, with taste following. 

We were sold out and Amy had all arrivals in for me, tho she did have a couple of things to pass on to me…I almost laffed at her tho, because she has one of those masks that have been floating around the front desk that have human lips on them…(Q wears one, too, tho I threw away the one Amy picked out for me because it didn’t present the reasonably professional appearance ol’ Sparrow demands.)…It was tuff not to laff because the lips on Amy’s mask were really big and really red and really funny…The line from Sparrow: 

You know, Amy, it’s tuff to take you seriously when your mask has funhouse lips. 

OK, perhaps not a Line of the Year candidate, but still not too bad. 

There were printer problems tonight – or, more accurately, printing problems, the printers worked fine – specifically stuff that is printed directly from the system, like reports and folios and whatnot, were not printing…Amy hadn’t said anything about it, so I presumed it was a glitch with my login, so I logged off and back on but that didn’t help so I took my usual step back and stared at the computer crossly with my hands on my hips before restarting it but that didn’t do squat, either…I went to the back office – where I’d be in five minutes anyway – and no-go there, either…It was the same deal…The workaround was easy, tho…Instead of printing something you preview it and then print from that tho you must be on your toes and make sure you’re sending it to the right printer. 

I told Tammy about this and she advised me to call the home office tech support line tonight but then she had the same problem when she tried to print her emergency reports, so it’s a system problem and not a Sparrow problem, which made me feel a little better. 

Around 0400 243 calls requesting two coffee cups, two K-things of coffee two packs of cocoa…Requests like this are rare and, for reasons I am not entirely prepared to explain, peeve me a little because part of me wanted to say, in my relentlessly cordial manner, that they are available at the front desk and to get off your keister and waddle down to the front desk and get them…This is not particularly reasonable, tho, and it’ s also surprising, because I genuinely enjoy being of service to guests.

Slow at the Veterans Service Office today…Barry, from the Legion, came by to sign up for VA medical but that was it…Barry said he’d signed up years ago and wondered how to get back in and the best way to do that is to file the paperwork again…He didn’t have his DD-214 tho, which probably wouldn’t be a problem since they have it from his original sign-up, but we’ll see. 

In a display of foresight virtually unprecedented, yours truly made an appointment to get the snow tires put on this Thursday…I called the tire store in the next county, where I’d purchased them last year, and by chance, they had an appointment Thursday when regular readers of this crap know I’m in the next county anyway…Usually, I’m pretty late getting this done, generally around Thanksgiving, but not this year…The only fly in the ointment is it’s been dry lately and isn’t scheduled to snow for five weeks…I appear to be the only one thinking snow tires right now, too, because Dale, the guy who took my call, said he was wide open for appointments Thursday and usually by this time you’ve got to wait a week or two to get in. 

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1630 Monday until 2130 Monday…5.0 hours for the day and 11.5 hours – a very depressing total – for the week. 

I don’t know what the deal is…I’m sleeping well but not for particularly long times the past three nights because it is taking me forever to get to sleep, longer than normal, because ol’ Sparrow has never been the type to get right to sleep…Today was a good example…I was really tired when I got home and went straight to bed and nothing…An hour later I was still awake so I did some reading and then started dozing off so I tried again and it still took a while to fall asleep. 

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence. 

It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name. 

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