It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Tuesday, March 5
Here is the Coke order (CO) for the week…It’s a doozy:
Coke Order
3/5/2024
1 Coke
1 Diet Coke
1 Minute Maid – ORANGE
1 Minute Maid – CRANBERRY
1 Monster – BLACK
1 Powerade – RED
4 Vitamin waters – DIFFERENT FLAVORS
1 Body Armor – PURPLE
1 Body Armor – FLASH
1 Sweet Tea
1 Core Power – CHOC
1 Core Power – VANILLA
1 Dunkies – FRENCH VANILLA
1 Dunkies – MOCHA
2 Smartwaters
5 Dasani
Thanks and have an Excellent day!
The Front Desk Supervisor (FDS)
Holy smokes, look at that, a proper sundry stand order (SSO), one freed from those blasted end-of-month economies…A lot of this stuff we’re out of, too, like juice, most Vitamin Waters, and Dasanis…And I know all of you noticed the two cases of Smartwaters…These are high-profit items, they sell well, and it’s about time the hotel started maximizing this.
Gabriella was by for her usual post-restaurant shift visit…On arrival, she stood in the middle of the lobby with her hands on her hips – just like we do when we’re peeved at something…Gabby’s a chick, of course, so this means she wants attention and the FDS was there to provide it…Gabby announced that a cook at the restaurant had noticed that she was gaining weight, a full two weeks or so after we first noted it here, tho we maintained the tact required not to mention it.
Now, if Gabby hadn’t already turned us down for a date we would’ve been the first one issuing denials and affirmations of eternal beauty…The only one, too, because the FDS – far from issuing denials – not only noted that a few gym sessions probably wouldn’t hurt Ms Gabby but that, as a restaurant employee, she had complimentary access to the hotel’s workout room…(Gabby knows this, of course, because up until earlier this year she used it fairly regularly.)
This was actually pretty funny and we added to the hilarity by laffing and telling the FDS to shut up, which made Gabby laff…Gabby graciously acknowledged the FDS’ point and said she has been so tired after her restaurant shifts and she had her other job in the morning and sometimes going to the gym wasn’t particularly doable…The FDS then added this was his way of flirting, then heralded his 0% success rate with it.
Then we retired to the back to process registration cards and they started talking about Spanish and how the FDS knows more than he lets on, tho that still isn’t a whole hell of a lot, certainly not a competitor to our trusty Spanglish…Then the FDS noted that numbers and the days of the week still left him flummoxed, leading Gabby to start rattling off the days of the week, with some background about the root of each word, except for Domingo (Sunday)…Well, hell, even a gringo heathen like me knows it comes from a Latin word meaning “the Lords Day”, so we pop out and announce this fact in a manner that it was common knowledge that any idiot knows, which drew a return-to-the-back-office face from both of them
Dray the Dairy Delivery Driver (D4) showed up around 0250…The big news is he has an interview at another delivery company tomorrow because he is tired of trucks that don’t work properly…This week his truck didn’t have a functioning hydraulic lift in the back, making his job about twice as tuff as it should be…He noted his week off last week was exhausting, too, as family came in from where it’s warm and dragged him around mountains snowboarding and snowshoeing all week.
There were a couple of laffs with Head Housekeeper Gloria this morning…The first came right after her arrival around 0510 and she asked where the hell her report was…Ooopsies; for some reason we had forgotten it, tho it only takes about five minutes to produce…First, you printout the actual report, which has the status of each room, and then you print out the rooms that paid doggie fees, and then you get a cover sheet and write down the doggie rooms, the late checkouts, the stayovers (guests with separate reservations for the same room which generally – tho not always – signifies a different payment method) and, in season, the room numbers and checkout times of the airline crews…While we were doing this, we noted what a thrill it had to be to actually see Sparrow work.
It’s certainly a rare enuff occurrence, Sparrow…
A good line, because most of the time when she comes in we’re sprawled out in the back office doing project work.
The other laff came about an hour later when Gloria came by as part of her morning rounds and noted 1) how some late checkouts were authorized, and, 2) how, as usual, she disapproved of them…Well, our hands are tied here because with each reservation there’s now a window that pops up asking us to offer the guest a late checkout and we advised Gloria of this.
– You’re kidding???
We pulled up a random reservation and showed her.
– %$#@&.
Her horror was total.
– This is what you are up against…Our hands are tied.
Later, we told this story to Tammy, and she noted that our new front desk training – which we are putting off until the last possible minute – now says to issue late checkouts as if they were Halloween candy.
Recall that without the VSO anymore, we have four days off (the rest of today, all day Wednesday and Thursday, plus most of Friday) before coming back to the hotel Friday nite…Our plan was to stay up today because there was no need to turn in as soon as we got home…Our plan was to go to the college dining hall for breakfast and then go home and do some work on the Sparrow For Congress website…Both plans were a failure, tho we succeeded in our plan to not go to bed until the afternoon.
Breakfast at the college dining hall blew, nowhere as good as lunch there is…Everything – hotcakes, sausage, tater tots, scrambled eggs – had been made weeks ago and heated up today…Our plans to enjoy some coffee, enjoy the view, and fart around on the phone were foiled, too, because it was snowing and there wasn’t much view to enjoy, and Faceplant went down…It was asking us to log in after five years of being logged in and wouldn’t accept our username and password…The coffee, tho, wasn’t too bad.
Then we got home and project work inspiration (PWI) wasn’t asserting itself…We looked at the Sparrow For Congress website, shrugged, and thought it looked pretty good…So we went and got some reading in, a nice long session, before starting to nod off.
Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1430 Tuesday until 2330 Tuesday…9.0 hours for the day and 26.0 hours for the week, both outstanding totals.
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The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.
It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name.
Coming soon! Gaylon’s books in actual book form!