The Daily Dose/Tuesday, June 8, 2021

The Daily Dose/June 8, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is working on a project and most elements of The Daily Dose – Leading Off, The Sunday Bottom 5, On This Date, Some Philosophy Crap, Trivia – are either on hiatus or running intermittently. Your full-service Daily Dose will return, probably later this spring, though perhaps in the summer.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow frets over the new back office chair at the hotel. Today’s Diary. 

I don’t know why they got rid of the old chair…It was still in good shape and as near as I can tell earned wide acclaim and drew no complaints and regular readers of this crap know a change of this magnitude has the potential to cause yours truly all kinds of angst because few are as big a creature of habit as moi…The old chair was comfortable and while the seat of the new chair is hardly laced with thumbtacks, the arms are not adjustable!!!…I am not making that up…

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Oh, what low joke was Fortuna playing on him now? Arrest, accident, job! Where would this dreadful cycle ever end?
John Kennedy Toole
A Confederacy of Dunce

———

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 7

Read Free Fortnight at The Diary continues. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Monday, June 7
There is a new chair at the desk in the hotel’s back office…This almost immediately following the tech refresh, which is a bit more change than any of us are looking for, frankly, but humans in general, if not night auditors specifically, are pretty flexible. 

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The Daily Dose/Monday, June 7, 2021

The Daily Dose/June 7, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is working on a project and most elements of The Daily Dose – Leading Off, The Sunday Bottom 5, On This Date, Some Philosophy Crap, Trivia – are either on hiatus or running intermittently. Your full-service Daily Dose will return, probably later this spring, though perhaps in the summer.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

It’s Read Free Fortnight (RFF) at The Diary.

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow is intent on making the lawn at The Shire a lush green again. Today’s Diary. 

I could’ve gotten even more watering done, but I stopped once I started nodding off because even tho the lawn needs soaking, we don’t need to fall asleep and leave it on in one spot while yours truly sleeps. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

But his time is not now, and so the legend dies.
Charles Kuralt

———

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It’s easy reading on any device. 

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 6

The Read Free Fortnight (RFF) thrill ride rolls on at The Diary.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Sunday, June 6
The recent tech refresh at the hotel included touch screen monitors for his own personal amusement, and ol’ Sparrow farted around with the new feature a lot tonight. 

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The Daily Dose/Sunday, June 6, 2021

The Daily Dose/June 6, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is working on a project and most elements of The Daily Dose – Leading Off, The Sunday Bottom 5, On This Date, Some Philosophy Crap, Trivia – are either on hiatus or running intermittently. Your full-service Daily Dose will return, probably later this spring, though perhaps in the summer.  

The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things.

1. Trump Reinstatement Good gravy, the insurrectionist-in-chief actually believes he will be reinstated president…Of course, ignorance like this is par for the course for a man who is a lying sexual predator who believes the moon is part of Mars…And that the Revolution was won by Americans securing British airports. 

2. Donald Trump Supporters Your man remains a lying sexual predator who believes the moon is part of Mars (see above)…Please, tell us again which of these traits continues to earn your support.

3. Lauren Daigle Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters preparing to bid adieu to Daigle’s regular weekly entry as single You Say drops to #3 on Billboard’s Hot Christian Singles chart after Billboard all-chart record 129 non-consecutive weeks at #1…While mindful this is a rather niche chart, Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” this is still one of the great accomplishments in chart history.

4. Coors Field Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” putting cream cheese on a bratwurst the greatest single greatest advance in the culinary arts since cheese was first deep fried, created either by some concession stand worker with some extra cream cheese that was about to go bad or by Providence on the 7th day. 

5. GOP Voting Laws – Why would any lawmaker in a nation conceived in liberty want to do anything other than to make voting as easy as possible for every citizen? Because the GOP is hell-bent on force-feeding their narrow, racist worldview on entire country…Why will be a great mystery when future historians gather to sort through the rubble of what was once the United States. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

Yes, it is Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary. Enjoy with Sparrow’s compliments.

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow reports there are new items at the hotel’s sundry stand. Today’s Diary. 

Joining the roster are those Push-Up deals we used to eat a lot as kids but which yours truly personally hadn’t seen for ages and a new ice cream cookie deal, this one featuring M&Ms…Good gravy, that looked good…I resisted the urge to field test one – to ensure a quality product for our valued guests, of course – after looking at the label: the cookie is a sugar cookie and the ice cream has added sugar and the whole shebang has 23 grams of sugar, something that’ll spike your blood sugar just writing about it. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

I’m not a jack of all trades…I’ve mastered myself.
Wes Watson

———

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 5

Of course, it’s Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary. Enjoy. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Saturday, June 5
Amy is off to the early lead in the June reward club signup race at the hotel, leading Assistant Front Desk Manager Q 3-to-2 after the first few days…I took advantage of the opportunity to jab the knife in a little further that Q’s reign as monthly signup champion is probably coming to an end, what with Amy moving to five PM shifts a week now, instead of three. 

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The Daily Dose/Saturday, June 5, 2021

The Daily Dose/June 5, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is working on a project and most elements of The Daily Dose – Leading Off, The Sunday Bottom 5, On This Date, Some Philosophy Crap, Trivia – are either on hiatus or running intermittently. Your full-service Daily Dose will return, probably later this spring, though perhaps in the summer.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

Q: Is it Read Free Fortnight (RFF) at The Diary of a Nobody?
A: Yes, it is Read FreeFortnight (RFF) at The Diary of a Nobody.

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow waters the grass at The Shire. Today’s Diary. 

The fly in the ointment, tho, is with the new weed store going up next door you just can’t put the big sprinkler on and turn it up full blast because you’ll water a good portion of the construction area…

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Tom looked in vain among the gang, as they poured along, for companionable faces. He saw only sullen, scowling, imbruted men…the strong pushing away the weak,—the gross, unrestricted animal selfishness of human beings, of whom nothing good was expected and desired…
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Uncle Tom’s Cabin

———

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
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The Diary of a Nobody/June 4

Read Free Fortnight (RFF) continues at The Diary. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Friday, June 4
There was some moderate action at the veterans service office (VSO) today…There were two messages waiting for me, one from Mr C and one from Mrs P…Regular readers of this crap may – or they may not – recall that Mr C is the gent living in a trailer without running water whose brother originally contacted me, while Mrs P is the widow whose late husband had originally been turned down for a claim the VA now routinely approves. 

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The Daily Dose/Friday, June 4, 2021

The Daily Dose/June 4, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is working on a project and most elements of The Daily Dose – Leading Off, The Sunday Bottom 5, On This Date, Some Philosophy Crap, Trivia – are either on hiatus or running intermittently. Your full-service Daily Dose will return, probably later this spring, though perhaps in the summer.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

Despite the fact it’s Read Free Fortnight (RFF), today’s entry is reserved for subscribers.

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow’s in the big city and goes to the ballgame. Today’s Diary. 

The big news is ol’ Sparrow found a stand where they sold – and I am not making this up – a bratwurst with cream cheese on it!!!…Again, I am not making this up…Temporarily flummoxed, I stood there staring at the menu for a few seconds like a dolt because this is something yours truly should have thought of ages ago…

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Nourish your mind. Rest in the position of doing nothing, and things will take care of themselves. Never ask the names of things, do not try to figure out the inner workings of nature. All things flourish of themselves.
Gore Vidal
Creation

———

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 3

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