The Daily Dose/November 11, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy 

In The News
We’ve made this point before: the real effect of the Trump Administration is not his policies or actions or utter disregard for how the presidency has historically operated. We’ll survive these. President Trump is a lot of things but he is not inherently evil, he merely lacks a long-term vision for our country or the skill to govern. This is not a bulletin. The GOP knew this when they nominated him and we knew it when we elected him. His only real talent, something he is supremely good at, is drawing attention to himself. 

No, what is really poisoning our country is his boorish behavior and his utter lack of interest in, concern for or empathy with anything other than himself. We elected a petulant nine-year-old to the presidency. Now, America’s national conversation has never been conducted in the queen’s English but, as our recent election pointed out, Americans are circling the wagon in a manner not seen, perhaps, since the slavery days.

An example is the NRA, hardly a bulletin, either, because few circle the wagons like they do. A recent post on their Facebook page equated guns and shootings with lighters and arson.

Good gravy, guys, was there nothing less sensitive available? Was the post showing the outline of an Uzi superimposed over the 2nd Amendment in for repairs? Some empathy would have been nice or, better yet, how about just shut up and stay silent for a while because the Second Amendment is not going to be repealed in the next five days.

Showing discretion and keeping quiet is seldom an option in America now, though. Civility is dead. Paced by our president, manners and courtesy have been tossed out with rinse water. All that matters now is energizing your supporters.

The shooter was another combat veteran who could not make a go of it on Civvie Street. Maybe if the NRA, everyone else in our country, stepped away from their wagons and championed ongoing mental health care for our veterans instead of our now usual partisan bickering, this would not have happened and we could have written about something else today.

Today At The Site
Sparrow lets the guy who couldn’t afford a room snooze in the lobby on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, Sparrow and Buzz start making plans to go to the holiday meal at the college’s dining room.

The kid said yeah it was and then, for reasons I’m sure he thought good, opened the box, probably to show me there wasn’t a bomb…I inspected the contents and the pizza, and accompanying breadsticks, looked really good.

“How much of this you gonna want back???…I’m just curious…”

The Thought for the Day is an encore from October of last year, former US Congressman and Oklahoma Sooner quarterback JC Watts talking about the American dream.

On This Date
In 1921 – The Tomb of the Unknowns at Arlington National Cemetary is dedicated by President of the United States Warren G Harding, the first warrior interred a soldier who had died in France in World War I, which had ended three years to the day earlier. Since 1948 the tomb has been guarded continuously by soldiers from the US Army’s 3rd US Infantry Regiment, commonly known as the Old Guard, who do not wear insignia on their uniforms so as not to outrank any of the Unknowns. The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier Guard Identification Badge is the second-least awarded qualification badge issued in the US military.

In 1944 – The New York Rangers defeat the Detroit Red Wings 5-2, ending their NHL-record winless streak at 25 games. The Rangers had last won on January 16 – the previous season – and had gone 0-21-4 during that span. The record is now held by the Winnipeg Jets – now the Arizona Coyotes – who went 0-23-7 in the 1980-81 season.

In 1973 – Eddie Kendricks is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with Keep On Truckin’. It was Kendricks’ fifth time at #1 but his first and only time as a solo act, the other four coming with the Temptations, a group he had left in 1971. The song also spent two weeks at #1 on Billboard’s R&B chart, then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart, in October.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The first officer commissioned into the United States Marine Corps was Samual Nicholas, commissioned Captain of Marines in November 1775. He is considered the first commandant of the Marine Corps.

Today’s Stumper
What is the least awarded qualification badge in the United States military? – Answer next time!

Let’s Be Friends: follow me on Facebook.

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/November 10, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

In The News
The only news now are the particulars: how many died and where. The fact there was another mass shooting in the United States is no longer news, of course, because for a while now America has averaged around two of these a month.

Why are we the only nation on Earth whose citizens regularly shoot up others? Why has our nation become a shooting gallery?

Certainly, the availability of guns is part of the reason. To deny that is folly. If there weren’t any guns there wouldn’t be any shootings. But other nations have guns and their citizens aren’t shooting their neighbors on a regular basis. Why is it happening here in America?

We have long said we have violent citizens because we have a violent government. America has been at war daily since 1989 and these are the consequences: violent citizens, a violent country, a violent world.

We think that denying this is folly, too. If America had been at peace for the past 30 years instead of at war, do you really believe mass shootings would be the regular occurrence they are now? Of course not. An America at peace for the past three decades would have produced a country that was at peace with itself and the rest of the world.

Friends, we will not have a peaceful world or a peaceful country without a peaceful America. Every single one of us – you, me, our friends in the Middle East – are entitled to see the world produced by an America at peace.

Today at the Site
At the retailer, Sparrow actually tells a woman how tasty it is to mix double stuff Oreos with hazelnut coffee creamer on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, it’s fairly busy at Hotel B and Sparrow talks about Thursday’s General Holiday. 

I made it sound like it was utterly to die for…The woman was actually intrigued by this, tho it should be noted she plainly liked me and probably would have show interest had I suggested mixing Band-Aids with motor oil…

Today’s Thought for the Day is an encore form September of last year, President John F Kennedy talking about being bold. Fresh Thought’s for the Day will return soon. 

America has a long history of being bold, with results that range from the inspiring to the tragic. 

On This Date
In  1775 – The United States Marine Corps is established by an act of the Second Continental Congress. It was the last act of the day by the Congress and followed a resolution authorizing General George Washington to invade Nova Scotia should “he should judge it practicable and expedient”. The Marine Corps was disbanded after the American Revolution and reformed again during the administration of President John Adams.

In 1963 – Gordie Howe of the Detroit Red Wings becomes the NHL’s all-time leader in goals scored, scoring his 545th goal in a 3-0 victory over the Montreal Canadiens. The old record had been held by Montreal’s Maurice “Rocket” Richard and Howe would retire with 801 goals. The record is now held by Wayne Gretzky with 894. Also in the game, Detroit goaltender Terry Sawchuk tied George Hainsworth’s all-time NHL record with his 94th shutout.

In 2018 – Bebe Rexha and Florida Georgia Line remain at #1 on Billboard’s Hot Country Songs chart for the 49th consecutive week. It is the only #1 song the chart has had this year and is the longest any single has spent at #1 on any Billboard chart. Meanwhile, 30 songs – including Meant to Be, in April – have hit #1 on Billboard’s Country Airplay chart in 2018. The current #1, She Got the Best of Me by Luke Combs, is one of three songs to spend three weeks at #1 in 2018. 

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The NBA player who has scored at least 60 points in a game the most times is Wilt Chamberlain, who did it 32 times.

Today’s Stumper
Who was the first officer commissioned in the United States Marine Corps? – Answer next time!

Let’s be friends. Follow me on Facebook

Share Gaylon! Go!

Friends, we enjoying a day off.

The Daily Dose and The Diary of a Nobody will return Saturday morning.

Thank you for understanding,
Gaylon

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/November 8, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

In The News
It has long been said that a government is nothing more than a reflection of the people it serves. This is a true statement. It’s been true here in America from before the founding of our republic when haphazard, determined British subjects formed a haphazard and determined government and that declared and then earned their independence.

It’s true today, too, when a partisan, fractured and bickering American electorate re-elected a partisan, fractured and bickering government.

It’s almost funny. In the enormous, almost unprecedented, hype leading up to Tuesday’s election some heralded the 2018 midterms as the most important midterms in American history, thought 1862 Civil War midterms still get our vote. We don’t know about you, but the day after we found ourselves sighing and wondering what all the fuss was about. Sure, the status quo was shuffled around somewhat, but nothing changed, the only think heralded was the status quo. Nothing was getting done under GOP control and the Democrats taking control of the House will certainly not change that.

Friends, our country is dying. Lost in the cacophony of the partisan strife that now attends every aspect of our American experience is the fact America took a flier on making substantive changes to the way we are governed. Nothing is going change; our two most pressing issues – perpetual war and exorbitant spending – will not be addressed. We are going to spend the next two years marking time bringing us two years closer to our country’s collapse because no nation has ever survived perpetual war and mindless spending with impunity.

America will not be the exception to that.

Today at the Site
Sparrow settles into his new gig at Hotel C, dealing a raccoon complaint on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, it was complete annihilation nationwide for his Minor Party in Tuesday’s election.

There is, of course, little I can do for you here…I am both unwilling and unable to do battle with raccoons in a ceiling, or anywhere else for that matter, and all I can really do is apologize and put you in another room…

It’s complete chaos – is there any other kind – in The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 11 with four teams enjoying bye weeks, the rest of the Bottom Ten takes the week off on the field, including Oakland, which ascends the throne after their impressive loss to San Francisco.

3. Cleveland Browns (2-6-1; lost to Kansas City 37-21) – Browns back in natural habitat – the B-10 medal stand – four (4) games into another of their patented losing streaks…B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” if NFL playoffs began today, Browns would not be in them…Next Loss: Atlanta

Editor’s Note: a subscription is required to read The Diary of a Nobody and The Bottom Ten. Click here to subscribe. Click here to read both columns as they ran during Read Free Fortnight. 

Also, rewrites on my forthcoming novel Criminals, Courtesans and Constables resumed and you can read the latest, including an updated character list, here.

Two new characters were introduced this session, The Constable, who is pursuing the main character and Constable, a cat the main character acquires for company.

On This Date
In  1519 – Aztec ruler Montezuma II welcomes Spaniard Hernando Cortez to his capital with great fanfare and an exchanging of gifts. He would later regret this, as within months he is made a prisoner in his own palace and was later killed under circumstances that are not entirely clear, resulting in the end of the Aztec empire.

In 1959 – Elgin Baylor of the Minneapolis Lakers scores 64 points in a 136-115 win over the Boston Celtics, establishing a new NBA record for most points scored in a game. The old record was 63 by Joe Fulks of the Philadelphia Warrior, done in 1949 and Baylor would break his own record the following year, scoring 64 points for the Los Angeles Lakers. The record is now held by Wilt Chamberlain, who scored 100 points in a March 1962 game.

In 1975 – I’m Sorry by John Denver is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for its only week, Denver’s third and final #1 on the country chart. I’m Sorry had also spent a week at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 in September, where it was Denver’s fourth and final #1 song.  Calypso, the B side of I’m Sorry, also received significant airplay and the record is sometimes credited as a double-sided hit.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The Billboard Hot 100 record for most consecutive #1 hits is seven, held by Whitney Houston.

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the NBA record for scoring at least 60 points in a game the most times? – Answer next time!

Let’s be friends. Follow me on Facebook

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/November 7, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

In The News
Not for the first time, Americans took a flier on making substantive changes to the way they are governed in Tuesday’s elections. People are saying this and they are saying that about what happened but let’s not kid ourselves, we marked time this election, doing nothing of substance.

Sure, the status quo was reshuffled somewhat and the Democrats took control of the House of Representatives but this means nothing because if nothing got done with the GOP in control of the White House and Congress even less than nothing will get done with the Democrats in control of the House. 

It will remain business as usual. Come January, when everyone takes office, our government will be the same partisan, fractured and bickering mess it is now. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either deluding themselves, trying to delude you or, as likely as not, both because our most pressing issues – our perpetual wars and our endless spending and debt – will not be addressed because we didn’t demand it at the ballot box. 

Our loss, too, because if these issues are not addressed America will ultimately be tossed aside the scrap heap of history, perhaps before this half century is out.

Today at the Site
Sparrow loses his Congressional race on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. 

Usually, I’d get some likes and shares and whatnot on Faceplant and Tweeter but this year, no, people were circling the wagons more than ever…The GOP incumbent won and it wasn’t particularly close, either.

Today’s Thought for the Day is an encore from this past summer, writer Dick Francis talking about taking monentous steps.

We can only plan our lives so much and there comes a time when we must, figuratively, leap in the dark to find out what nature and circumstance have in store for us. 

The NFL Bottom Ten will move Thursday, a day later than usual. Apologies are issued.  

On This Date
In 1940 – The Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapses in a windstorm, only four months after it opened. A complete analysis of the bridge’s construction is, thankfully, beyond the scope of this feature, but designers were not expecting heavy traffic, so the bridge was built rather narrow and shallow, factors which led to its collapse. The only fatality was a dog left in a car that declined rescue, preferring to attempt to bite a rescuer. A new Tacoma Narrows Bridge would open ten years later.

In 1991 – Magic Johnson of the Los Angeles Lakers announces he has HIV and retires from the NBA after twelve seasons. Johnson did not stay retired, though, he was elected a starter for the NBA All-Star Game that season, played in the 1992 Olympics, attempted a comeback with the Lakers, and later coached them, and briefly played in Europe.

In 1964 -The Supremes top the Billboard Hot 100 as Baby Love is at #1 for the second of four consecutive weeks. It was the second of five consecutive #1s for the Supremes, tying a record originally established by Elvis Presley and now good for third on the all-time list. The song also made the Supremes the first act from Motown Records to have multiple #1s on the Hot 100 and also went to #1 in New Zealand and Great Britain.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Abraham Lincoln was a Republican in the 1860 election and a member of the National Union Party, which was, to a great extent, a renamed Republican Party, for the 1864 election.

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the Billboard Hot 100 record for most consecutive #1 hits ? – Answer next time!

Let’s be friends. Follow me on Facebook

Share Gaylon! Go!