The Daily Dose/December 15, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow signs some Christmas cards. They’re not his, of course. Today’s Diary. 

The hotel sends out no small number of them and the stack was well over a hundred…I got a new fountain pen recently so ol’ Sparrow was able to sign his distinctive, illegible hand in his treasured green ink…That’s a lot of Sparrows to sign, but care was taken to make sure the last signatures were as unreadable as the first ones. 

The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 16 – The race for The Dan Henning Trophy – symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten supremacy – rolls on. 

It’s now or never for Texans, as team faces must lose game this week, desperately needing to avenge Week 1 win over Jaguars to have any hope of earning B-10 title…

…game not only has two (2) teams not going to playoffs, but game officials, TV announcers assigned to this one probably not on fast track to postseason assignments, either

…never say die Bengals have lost two (2) straight and four (4) out of six (6), so B-10 pollsters keeping tabs on them out of habit…

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On This Date
History’s long march. 

In 1836 – A fire at the temporary headquarters of the US Patent Office and Postal Service in Washington, D.C. causes almost 10,000 patents issued to date to be destroyed. Though intrigue within the neighboring Postal Service caused arson to be suspected for a while, the cause was later determined to be accidental, with patents issued prior to the fire are referred to as X-Patents. An attempt to restore the original patents, mostly from retrieving duplicates from inventors, resulted in only 2,845 patents being restored. 

In 1973 – The Temple Owls and the Tennessee Volunteers establish a new NCAA record for the fewest points in a game since the abolition of the center jump after every basket in 1938 in an 11-6 Tennessee win. Temple’s six points tied the NCAA major division post-1938 record for the fewest points in a game established by Arkansas State in January 1945 and research into the pre-1938 record was inconclusive. The game was delayed several times after disgruntled fans threw things onto the court. 

In 1958 – The Teddy Bears are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the third and final consecutive week with To Know Him Is To Love Him. It was the first chart single for the group that was led by Phil Spector and remains their only Top 10 hit. The song also peaked at #2 in Great Britain, at #10 on Billboard’s soul chart and was written by Spector, who was inspired by the words on his father’s tombstone. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

If destruction be our lot, we ourselves must be its author and finisher. As a nation of free men, we must live through all times, or die by suicide.
Abraham Lincoln
1/27/1838 

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The first assist in NHL history was by Ken Randall of the Toronto Arenas, who assisted on the first goal in NHL history by Harry Meeking on March 11, 1918, in a 7-3 over the Montreal Canadiens. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

When and to whom was the first US patent issued? – Answer next time!  

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The Daily Dose/December 14, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

Editor’s Note: at over 1,500 words, this is by far the longest Diary of a Nobody entry ever. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow spends a good part of the night dealing with a guest who simply will not go away. Today’s Diary. 

My interactions with 227 started about midnight when he called demanding to know why he couldn’t make an outside call…

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Final – It started in the summer, with 130 crazy dreamers starting the quest for Bottom Ten glory and concludes today with the awarding of the ESPNCup, Tostitos Plaque, Sgt Bilko Trophy and Continental Cup. 

Vanderbilt still reeling from turn-of-century decision to merge Athletic, Student Affairs departments as music students hired as quality control assistants demand band add musical score to every play, resulting in NCAA season-record 793 delay of game penalties as audibles could not be heard.

FBS Independents first not real conference to win coveted B-10 Conference of the Year award since Confederación de Escuelas Mexicanos – Tijuana Tech, Baja California A&M, Acapulco State – took Conference of Year honors in 1957. 

With losses at both Michigan and Penn State, B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” Hoosiers set some kind of mark for Highest Average Attendance Per Loss.

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4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
History’s long march. 

In 1911 – A team of five led by Roald Amundsen of Norway become the first humans to reach the South Pole. The expedition spent four days at the pole before returning to civilization and announcing their accomplishment on March 7. It was later determined that, based on his calculations, Amundsen had come within about 2,500 yards of the South Pole which, considering the era and available equipment, was probably very good.  A group led by Englishman Robert Falcon Scott reached the South Pole a month later and died on their attempted return. 

In 1943 – Bill Cowley of the Boston Bruins establishes a new NHL record for most career assists in a 4-3 victory over the Chicago Black Hawks. Cowley had two assists, giving him 258 for his career, breaking the mark of 257 established by Frank Boucher of the New York Rangers. Cowley would retire in 1947 with 353 assists, a mark later broken by Elmer Lach of the Montreal Canadiens (408) and now held by Wayne Gretzky with 1,963. 

In 1996 – Toni Braxton is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the second of eleven consecutive weeks with Un-Break My Heart, her second and final #1 song. The song also went to #1 in five other countries, including Romania, peaked at #2 in Great Britain and was Billboard’s 81st-biggest hit of 1996 and its 4th-biggest of both 1997 and the 1990s. The song also ranked 15th on Billboard’s 60th Anniversary Hot 100 in 2018 and spent four weeks at #2 on Billboard’s soul chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Victory awaits him who has everything in order –  luck, people call it. Defeat is certain for him who has neglected to take the necessary precautions in time; this is called bad luck.
Roald Amundsen.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The NBA record for most points in a regulation game is 320 when the Golden State Warriors defeated the Denver Nuggets162-158 on November 2, 1990. It was the regular-season opener for both teams. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who had the first assist in NHL history? – Answer next time!  

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The Daily Dose/December 13, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow steadfastly refuses to give out guest information. Today’s Diary. 

Or maybe he’s stalking her and wants to kill her…That could be in play, too, which is why you don’t give out guest info like this…Of course, if the boyfriend had any brains he’d simply call me and ask for me to ring the room of guest so-and-so and I’d look it up and report she wasn’t staying here, a handy workaround usually known only to stalkers and hookers…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
History’s long march. 

In 1294 – Pope Celestine V resigns as head of the Catholic Church and ruler of the Papal States after five months in office, preferring to revert to his previous life as a hermit. Celestine was later imprisoned by his successor Boniface VIII, who feared his election as an antipope, prison Celestine died in in 1296. Celestine remains the last pope not elected by a papal conclave and was the third of six non-cardinals elected pope. 

In 1983 – The Detroit Pistons and the Denver Nuggets establish a new NBA record for most points in a game in 186-184 triple-overtime Piston victory. The mark of 370 points broke the record of 337 points established by the San Antonio Spurs and the Milwaukee Bucks in March 1982 and remains the two-highest team scoring totals in NBA history. The game was tied at 145 after regulation and the 93 total assists remain an NBA record. 

In 1975 – Silver Convention is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third and final consecutive week with Fly, Robin, Fly, the first #1 song by a German act on the Hot 100. The song also went to #1 in Canada, peaked at #28 in Great Britain and at #3 in their native West Germany. Fly, Robin, Fly also went to #1 on Billboard’s soul and disco charts and was Billboard’s 14th biggest song of 1976. It was the first chart single for the group and the follow-up, Get Up and Boogie peaked at #2 the following year. The song also won the Grammy Award for Best R&B Instrumental Performance.   

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

…the essential cause of the Roman conquest of Greece was the disintegration of Greek civilization from within. No great nation is ever conquered until it has destroyed itself.
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization, Vol II: The Life of Greece

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Washington Redskins, now the Washington Football Team was founded as the Boston Braves in 1932.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What is the NBA record for most points in a regulation game? – Answer next time!  

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/December 12, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things. 

The Sunday Bottom 5 will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

Yes, it is Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary.

The Diary of a Nobody – The hotel has its Christmas party. Today’s Diary. 

This is really the only time yours truly regrets being the nite auditor: the hotel provides rooms and ground transportation to and from and it’s a great opportunity to get smashed on free company booze with utter impunity…Unless you’re reporting for duty later that night…In that case, you have a modest amount of champagne and that’s it. 

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1985 – Arrow Air Flight 1285 – a DC-8 charter carrying US troops from Egypt to Fort Campbell, Kentucky, crashes after take off from Gander, New Foundland. All 256 occupants, including 236 members of the US Army’s 101st Airborne Division, were killed. An investigation by Canadian authorities concluded that ice on the wings caused the crash, a finding that was not believed by some. The crash remains Canada’s worst air disaster and the US Army’s deadliest peacetime air disaster. 

In 1937 – The Washington Redskins defeat the Chicago Bears 28-21 in the NFL Championship Game at Wrigley Field in Chicago. The Bears led 21-14 at the end of the third quarter, but the Redskins got two touchdown passes from quarterback Sammy Baugh to win it. The Redskins would also win the NFL title in 1947 and would later win three Super Bowls. Each Washington player received $225 for the win, about $4,250 in today’s money. The winner’s share for the most recent Super Bowl was $130,000. 

In 1981 – Earth, Wind & Fire is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the third of eight consecutive weeks with Let’s Groove. It was the seventh of eight #1 soul songs for the group and their 15th of 20 Top 10 soul hits. The song also peaked at #3 on the Hot 100 and in Great Britain and was Billboard’s 2nd-biggest soul song of 1982. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

One thorn of experience is worth a whole wilderness of warning.
James Russell Lowell

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Before becoming an astronaut, Harrison Schmitt was a geologist. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

In what city were the Washington Redskins founded? – Answer next time!  

Share Gaylon! Go!