The Daily Dose/May 28, 2017

Notes from around the Human Experience…

HUT, HUT HIKE: The NFL farted around with its overtime procedures recently, changing the length of an overtime period from 15 minutes to ten minutes.

FYI: The change is cosmetic. In reality, the NFL did nothing because NFL games can still end in a tie. In fact, the likelihood of a tie game has probably increased, since overtime periods are now shorter, giving teams less time to score.

Some people with more time on their hands than us estimated that as many as three NFL games each season could now end in a tie. The NFL disputes this, saying a shorter overtime period will result in more aggressive play calling, which will result in fewer tie games. Since it is good not to believe anything the NFL says, we’re trusting our instincts and and saying this change will lead to more tie games.

Dry, Technical Matter: For a long time overtime in the NFL was sudden death: the first team to score won. Sometimes it still is, but sometimes it isn’t. If Team A scores a touchdown on the first possession of the overtime, or if the defense musters a safety on the first possession, the game is over. If neither team scores on the first possession, the game becomes sudden death again.

Do You Wonder Why You Don’t Get Invited To More Parties?: However, if Team A scores a field goal, on the first possession, Team B gets the chance to possess the football. If Team B also scores a field goal, the game becomes sudden death again. If Team B scores a touchdown, though, they win.

Yay! Problem Solved!: We appreciate the argument that overtime is hard on the players, however it is silly that NFL games can still end in a tie. If the NFL does not want to resort to a field goal kicking contest, here is a way to determine a winner that generally will not take a lot of time.

Team A starts with the ball at the 50-yard line and the two teams play under normal rules, except there isn’t a clock or field goals. If Team A scores a touchdown, Team B gets the ball on the 50-yard line. If they score a touchdown and the game is tied, play continues. If one team leads after each scored a touchdown, the game is over.

If Team A doesn’t score, however, Team B gets the ball where Team A’s drive ended. If they advance past the 50-yard line, they are awarded what we are calling a scrimmage point and win the game. If Team B does not advance past the 50-yard line, Team A is awarded the scrimmage point and wins the game.

The Bottom Line: This would likely result in less wear and tear on players and it would ensure that every NFL game had a winner!

Oh, What The Hell: The Archbishop of Canterbury, Thomas Cranmer, declares Henry VIII’s marriage to Anne Boleyn to be valid on this date in 1533. The two had married secretly earlier in the month.

It was a busy week for the Archbishop, who plainly knew which side his bread was buttered on. A few days earlier he had annulled Henry’s marriage to his first wife, Catherine of Aragon, who had declined to produce a male heir. after Pope Clement VII got his shorts in a knot and refused to do so.

Fly In The Ointment: Later, Henry would tire of Anne and have her executed in 1536.

Great Moments In Screwing The Indians: President Andrew Jackson signs the Indian Removal Act on this date in 1830. The law authorized the government to negotiate with Indians for their territory, in exchange for land in beautiful Oklahoma.

Some tribes, like the Choctaws in Mississippi, signed treaties with the government while others, like the Seminoles in Florida, leading to war and forcible relocations.

Maybe The Neighbors Could Take Some Of Them: The Dionne quintuplets are born near Callander, Ontario on this date in 1934. They were the first quintuplets in history to have all five babies survive infancy.

The girls were born two months early and while individual weights weren’t recorded, they weighed a combined 13 pounds, six ounces and initially were kept in wicker baskets.

Oh Yeah: Two of the quintuplets, now 83, are still alive.

Up, Up And Away: West German pilot Mathias Rust, then 18, lands a private plane on Moscow’s Red Square on this date in 1987. Rust had taken off from Helsinki earlier that day and told fight controllers he was flying to Stockholm before immediately heading east and turning off his communications equipment.

Originally Rust planned to land inside the Kremlin but decided, probably wisely, that this would give the evil Russians the opportunity to kill him – or worse – and deny anything had happened.

Rust was arrested, convicted of hooliganism, disregarding aviation laws and breaching the Soviet border and was sentenced to four years in prison, though he was released the following year as a goodwill gesture.

Thought For The Day: Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. – Winston Churchill

Answer To The Last Trivia Question: The Chrysler Building replaced 40 Wall Street as the world’s tallest building.

Today’s Stumper: How many wives did Henry VIII have? – Answer next time!

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