The Diary of a Nobody/March 10

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Sunday, March 10
The British ski club left at 0200…They started filtering in an hour before and certainly had their share of bloody requests, mainly plastic cutlery but also the usual hot water request – this one for a beverage container for some tea – and one lady even asked if we kept “scales back there”…I thought she might have been asking for something having to do with fish, but she was looking for something to weigh her luggage with, which we didn’t have either…Honestly, I don’t think even the Beverly Hills Hotel would have that but, thinking on my feet, I was able to offer the human scale in the weight room, which was appreciated, though declined because it would be too much work.

Early on a guy came up looking to buy a Smart Water…He asked me how much they were and I had no idea, so I said two bucks, not unreasonable, and he pulls out a fiver, puts it on the counter and announces he’ll buy two…While he’s at the cooler I told him I’d sell him three for $5, another raw display of my authority, good luck stopping me…He says sure, and I go to ring it up and it turns out Smart Waters are $2.50, so I ring up two, throwing the third one in with my compliments.

The Halliburton crew does like their French vanilla creamer, as that was, again, the most used for morning muster…They used so much, in fact, I had to put more in the rack…Hazelnut was untouched and regular got modest usage and the coffee pot was about half-empty, so I suspect one or two guys are putting an awful lot of creamer in their coffee.

I’ve begun fretting over the creamer that is in the rack…There are three types, of course, and they are stacked on top of each other, for two row and we tend to replace the top level as soon as it’s used because a full rack of creamer looks better than a half full rack…But do the bottom creamers ever get used???…I don’t really think it matters because they have a half-life instead of an expiration date and I’ll be honest, I’m not really the type to go and rotate creamers in the first place because they all have to be individually placed and I don’t really do those things well, the one time I was obliged to completely fill the creamer rack it ended up looking like Stevie Wonder had filled it…I will say this, tho: replacement creamers are kept in baskets in a drawer at the coffee station and when I take them to the coffee room to be refilled I do toss those remaining in the basket back in the box, so they are rotated somewhat…It is, tho, entirely possible the bottom rows of creamers have in the rack for five years.

About 0445 a younger woman comes in and asks if we have a “vacancy with a dog” which made it sound like we have rooms equipped with dogs, which we don’t…You have to bring your own, tho we do have doggie treats at the front desk…As it was, we didn’t even have an available room for her.

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1700 Sunday until 1945 Sunday…Christ, not even three hours, barely even a nap…Regular readers of this crap know we went thru this last Sunday, too…I have no idea why…True, it was all-you-can-get-sleep Saturday and I got 9.5 hours, but the Saturday Sleep Session (SSS) has yielded good rest in the past without this nonsense on Sunday.

All I know is I slept thru Sunday Night Spaghetti…The Wife was understanding, tho.

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.

It was inspired by the 19th century British novel of the same name.

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