The Drivel You Need. The Name You Trust.

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———
Click here for free chapters from all of Gaylon’s books. 
———
Gayon For Congress!
Click here to visit the official campaign website. 

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The Daily Dose/Saturday, May 18, 2024

The Daily Dose/May 18, 2024
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow mows the lawn, but the battery dies toward the end. Today’s Diary. 

The middle setting for a high lawn meant the mower had to work extra hard and she threw in the towel about three-quarters of the way thru…The delay was 45 minutes, not too bad but certainly enuff time to ensure ol’ Sparrow totally stiffened up and finishing up was completely misery…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1896 – The US Supreme Court, in a 7-1 decision, rules in Plessy v. Ferguson that the separate but equal legal doctrine is constitutional, legalizing Jim Crow laws in the South.  The case began in 1892 when Homer Plessey, a mixed-race man, boarded a whites-only train car in New Orleans in violation of Louisiana’s Separate Car Act. The lone dissenting opinion was issued by Justice John Harlan, who dissented many times in civil liberty cases during his time on the court. 

In 1897 – Bill Joyce of the New York Giants ties the major league record for most triples in a game in an 11-5 win over the Pittsburgh Pirates. Joyce had four triples, tying the record established by George Strief of the Philadelphia Athletics in the American Association in 1885 and the feat remains unmatched. The modern major league record for most triples in a game is three, done many times. 

In 1959 – Wilbert Harrison is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with Kansas City. The song spent eight weeks in the Top 10 and 16 weeks on the chart, was Billboard’s 7th-biggest song of the year, and was in its second of seven consecutive weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart. It was the first chart single for Harrison, his first of two Top 40 hits, and remains his only #1 song. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

…you can never enslave a reluctant people without first charming them. Certainly you must convince them that your way is their way and that the chains you have forged for them are necessary ornaments.
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Mickey Wright of the US has won the most LPGA Championship titles with four. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How long did John Harlan serve on the US Supreme Court? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 17

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The Daily Dose/Friday, May 17, 2024

The Daily Dose/May 17, 2024
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow makes hotcakes. Today’s Diaray. 

We are still avoiding processed sugar…so we went with what has to be the lowest wrung on the Syrup Scale (SC): the retailer’s house brand sugar-free crap. 

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1987 – The USS Stark, – a guided missile frigate – is attacked in the Persian Gulf when an Iraqi fighter jet fired two missiles into her. The aircraft ignored warnings from the Stark to identify itself and fired missiles from 22 and 15 miles away. The attack killed 37 sailors and injured 21. Iraq apologized and claimed the pilot thought the Stark was an Iranian freighter. The Stark was repaired in Bahrain before returning to the US. 

In 1998 – Se Ri Pak of South Korea wins the LPGA Championship at the DuPont Country Club in Wilmington, Delaware, shooting a final-round 68 to defeat Donna Andrews and Lisa Hackney by three strokes. It as the first of three LPGA Championship wins for Pak and her first of five major victories. Pak retired after the 2015 season with 25 LPGA tour wins and was elected to the World Golf Hall of Fame in 2007.

In 1969 – The  Broadway cast album from the musical Hair is at #1 on Billboard’s album chart – then known as the Top LPs chart – for the fourth of 13 consecutive weeks. Though the album did not produce any chart singles, a medley of two songs from the album, Aquarius and Let The Sun Shine In by the 5th Dimension, was in its 6th and final week at #1 on the Hot 100. The album also went to #2 in Australia, and it remains the last Broadway cast album to go to #1 on the Billboard album chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

…rational studies had to fight for soil and air in a jungle of superstition, intolerance, and fear.
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization, Vol. VI: The Reformation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Boston Beaneater/Braves played at South End Grounds III through the 1914 season. Braves Field opened in 1915, and in both seasons they played home games at Fenway Park. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Which golfer has won the most LPGA Championship titles? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 16

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The Daily Dose/Thursday, May 16, 2024

The Daily Dose/May 16, 2024
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

LEADING OFF: DRY, TECHNICAL MATTER: The centuries are littered with attempts by various peoples to destroy the Jews. So you’d expect Israel to have reacted strongly to Hamas’ October attack. They had every right to, and they’ve been naming the score almost since Day 1.

FunFact: If this war were an athletic event, a mercy rule would’ve been invoked early on, because Israel has been naming the score almost from the start. It has been such a route that you have to wonder what Hamas was thinking. They had to have known, or at least strongly suspected, that Israel would end up handing them their lunch.

Calling A Spade A Spade: This is no longer a war, though. War is comabt designed to gain military and tactical advantages and superiority and Israel gained that weeks ago.

The G Word: Now this war is merely an effort to slaughter as many Palestinians as possible. It is a genocide, which my dictionary defines as:

The deliberate killing of a large number of people from a particular nation or ethnic group with the aim of destroying that nation or group.

That is exactly what is going on now. We suspect Israel knows this, too, because if anyone knows a genocide when they see one, it’s the Jews because History is littered with attempts to annihilate them.

The Bottom Line: Supporting Israel means supporting their right to exist, it does not mean supporting everything they choose to do. Their war with Hamas is now nothing more than an exercise in killing as many Palestinians as possible. This is genocide and it must be stopped immediately. We’ve said this before It’s possible to condemn genocide and not be anti-Semitic. Israel has killed over 35,000 Palestinians, including no small number of women and children. We Americans share in that total and we have blood on our hands, too. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow doesn’t go on a date. Today’s Diary. 

Well, there is still one line in the water, but immediate planetary alignment is a more realistic expectation than a bite on this line…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1991 – Queen Elizabeth II of Great Britain addresses a joint meeting of Congress. The queen received three standing ovations and and numerous other interruptions during her 12-minute address and Elizabeth remains the only British monarch to address Congress. Various sources refer to the Queen addressing a joint session of Congress, but only the president addresses a joint session. Everyone else, including monarchs, addresses joint meetings. 

In 1894 – The home of the Boston Beaneaters – now the Atlanta Braves – burns to the ground following a 10-8 win over the Baltimore Orioles. South End Grounds burned down after a fire started by children playing under the right field bleachers, a fire that destroyed 117 other buildings. The Beaneaters played home games at Congress Street Grounds which had hosted Boston’s major league teams in the Players League and American Association until South End Grounds III opened on July 20. 

In 1981 – Ray Parker, Jr. & Raydio is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks with A Woman Needs Love (Just Like You Do). The song also peaked at #4 on the Hot 100 and went Top 10 pop in Canada, New Zealand, and the Netherlands. It was the seventh of eight Top 40 soul hits for the group and remains their only #1. Parker would later have a #1 pop hit with Ghostbusters.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

When their turn in the spotlight of History came, these people challenged the accepted thinking of their day.
David J Peck
Or Perish in the Attempt: Wilderness Medicine in the Lewis and Clark Expedition

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The judge in Andrew Johnson’s impeachment trial was Chief Justice Salmon P Chase. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How long did the Boston Beaneaters play at South End Grounds III? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 15

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The Daily Dose/Wednesday, May 15, 2024

The Daily Dose/May 15, 2024
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has a great day in the sack. Today’s Diary.

12.0 fabulous hours for the day and 26.0 hours for the week, an excellent figure in its own right…

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1868 – President of the United States Andrew Johnson is acquitted of assorted charges by the United States Senate. Johnson had been impeached by the House of Representatives in March on eleven charges mostly stemming from violations of the Tenure of Office Act. Johnson was acquitted by one vote, was not nominated for reeelction, and was succeeded by Ulyses S. Grant the following year. 

In 1918 – Walter Johnson of the Washington Senators ties the major league record for most innings pitched in a shutout in a 1-0 victory over the Chicago White Sox. Johnson pitched all 18 innings in the game, tying the record done three times previously, and the record still stands. Johnson gave up ten hits, walked one, struck out ten, and contributed a single during the winning rally in the bottom of the 18th. 

In 1971 – Ray Price is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the first of three consecutive weeks with I Won’t Mention It Again. It was the sixth of eight #1 country songs for Price in a chart career that spanned from 1952-92. The song also went #1 country in Canada and peaked at #42 on the Hot 100. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

There is always something else to be done. But if you want the world you must forget insignificant places…
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Soviet Union launched the first space station. Salyut 1 was launched in April 1971 and was in orbit until October. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who was the judge in Andrew Johnson’s impeachment trial? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 14

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Tuesday, May 14
The big news is the summer vest made its debut tonite, marking the first time we went to the hotel without a jacket since October…We even wore the summer ranch hat, too…Key here is not so much the temperature when we leave The Shire, but what the temperature is going to be when we leave the hotel…You must dress for the coldest temperature and we’re pretty much wusses here and demand AM temperatures to be above 40° in order to wear the vest and ranch hat…(Actually, over 45° is the preferred temperature, but after a long winter, there is some cabin fever to be dealt with.)…We seem to recall this being a bit late in the season for the vest to be making its debut, but we haven’t been keeping a spreadsheet on this vital matter and we trust/hope you haven’t been, either. 

Here’s this week’s Coke Order (CO)…The Front Desk Supervisor remains on vacation:

@$#^*&&BREQHY^&
EVFUJH&^%$@N
@#VHI&OOLLL@#%$)+_

Tragically, our pic of the original source material got eaten alive, but take ol’ Sparrow’s word for it, it was a mess, a jumble of last week’s order and cross-outs and rewrites…We were unable to make heads or tails of it and it looks like a mathematical proof in support of some new computer code…Not clear, either, was who was responsible for this…Kylie is the lead suspect because she worked today and – with Tammy on vacation – will be working when the Coke Guy (CG) comes, so maybe it’s her own, private shorthand. 

And the days of putting wifi code stickers in key packets is over!!!

I am not making that up…And the question must be asked: did ol’ Sparrow call it, or what???…Because recall when we started using the new smaller key packets earlier this week we noted the Access Code Label (ACL)  barely fit on one side…In fact, there was even a millimeter or so over overlap…This wasn’t that big a deal, except for when you didn’t get the label all the way on the packet, in which case you had Access Code Label Overlap (ACLO), which isn’t the best look to give guests…From here on out, the AGM advised, we will write the access code on the packet. 

This, of course, eliminates one of the more tedious of nite auditor duties: printing out the labels and sticking them in the packets…Actually, it was a harmless, mindless duty that could be done while binge-watching stuff, but we’ll miss being able to whine about having to do it. 

The AGM scooted early, too, hardly a bulletin since it’s still slow and there wasn’t much for one person to do, much less two…He was grateful for this, noting his wife was waiting to do the Wordle with him, and the earlier he got home the earlier this vital husbandly obligation was completed. 

Dray the Dairy Delivery Driver (D4) was by around 0450 and he was pleased to report this will be his new Lobby Arrival Time (LAT) from here on out…This is because those rats at the grocery won’t take deliveries from him until 0600 and his first delivery, at the retailer, can be done anytime, so there’s no reason to get up at zero-dark-thirty anymore…That was about all we got out of D4 this morning, tho, because right then the last remaining arrivals – a group of workers – showed up, and they had three rooms and even tho they were already checked in, they spoke little English and even with my trusty Spanglish, it took some time to tell them where they could park their trucks and where their rooms were and D4 had to get going. 

The news from the sundry stand freezer is huge: pizza has been moved from the bottom shelf to the top shelf…I am not making that up…They been laid three across on the bottom since we started here a few years ago but someone – this time there are no suspects – decided change was in order.

Pizza now occupies the right side of the top shelf, where ice cream used to be, and because there is room to stack them, you can actually get four boxes of pizza in there now, instead of the three you could get into the bottom…In theory this is a win for the consumer, but we only carry peperoni pizza, so it really it’s a wash. ..(The ice cream, by the by, has been moved to the bottom shelf, where there’s enuff room to provide ice cream for a frigate.)

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1130 Tuesday until 2330 Tuesday…12.0 fabulous hours for the day and 26.0 hours for the week, an excellent figure in its own right.  

———

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence. 

The Diary of a Nobody was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name. 

Coming soon! Gaylon’s books in actual book form!

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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, May 14, 2024

The Daily Dose/May 14, 2024
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow declines to ask a girl out. Today’s Diary. 

…any objective analysis would conclude there wasn’t any semblance of a spark…So we passed, interest and opportunity not intersecting today. 

———

Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1973 – The first US space station, Skylab, is launched from the Kennedy Space Center in Florida. Skylab would be manned by three separate three-man crews with the last crew leaving in February 1974. Skylab returned to Earth in 1979 after its orbit decayed and it burned up upon reentry, with debris landing in the western Pacific.  

In 1985 – Paul Coffey of the Edmonton Oilers establishes the NHL playoff record for most points in a game by a defenseman in a 10-5 win over the Chicago Blackhawks in Game 5 of the Campbell Conference Finals. Coffey had a goal and five assists for six points to break the record of five done several times previously, including by Coffey on April 20 and the record still stands. The Oilers would defeat the Blackhawks in six games and later defeated the Philadelphia Flyers for the Stanley Cup in five games. 

In 2005 – Gwen Stefani is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the second of four consecutive weeks with Hollaback Girl. It was the second of ten Top 40 hits for Stefani, her second of five Top 10 hits, and remains her only #1 song. The song also went to #1 in Australia, peaked at #8 in Great Britain and on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 2nd-biggest song of the year. It was the first digital download to sell one million copies in the US. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Distinctions in society will always exist under every just government. Equality of talents, of education, or of wealth cannot be produced by human institutions.
Andrew Jackson

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The major league record for most strikeouts in a game is held by Tom Cheney of the Washington Senators, who struck out 21 batters in a 16-inning game in 1962.  

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What country launched the first space station? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 13

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