The Daily Dose/November 15, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow and The Wife spend some quality time in the next county. Today’s Diary. 

While we were in the next county we had dinner at our fave Mexican joint and then went and watched some funny guys called the Harlem Wizards play basketball…This was a pretty good show…It was at the high school and I found out about them because they were staying at the hotel last week…I’d never seen the Wizards before, but I go way back with their kindred spirits, the Globetrotters because they held their winter training where I went to high school in LA and they were pretty friendly and if you paid attention you learned the secret of how Curly made his half-court shot regularly: he shot it a hundred times a day, a lesson I wasn’t really ready to learn when I was a kid. The Wizards put on a hell of a show…They were in tuff against the faculty, tho the Wizards eventually pulled away at the end because they could dunk and the teachers couldn’t.  

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
In 1777 – After 16 months of debate, the Continental Congress of the United States adopts the Articles of Confederation. It was the third item of business that day, right behind dealing with a letter from General George Washington requesting “blankets and other articles of cloathing”. The Articles, among other things, did not provide for an executive and dictated the several states be represented by no less than two nor more than seven members, and delegates were limited to serving three years in any six year period. The Articles of Confederation were replaced by the United States Constitution in 1789. 

In 1973 – Bobby Orr of the Boston Bruins becomes the first NHL defensemen to have seven points in a game in a 10-2 victory over the New York Rangers. Orr had a goal and two assists in the first period and added two goals and two assists in the third period. Orr broke the record of six that had been done five times in the past, including twice by Orr. The record for most points in a game by defenseman is now eight, done twice, most recently by Paul Coffey of Edmonton in 1986. 

In 1941 – Freddie Martin is at #1 on Billboard’s Best Selling Singles chart – it’s first American popular music chart – for the seventh of eight consecutive weeks with Piano Concerto in B Flat. It was the first of four #1 songs for Martin, all in the 1940’s and was originally composed by Tchaikovsky in 1875 and revised 1879 and 1888. Martin also recorded a version of the song with lyrics, which charted under the name Tonight We Love. A rather versatile performer, his novelty song Pico and Sepulveda – named after a Los Angeles intersection – was recorded under the name Felix Figueroa and his Orchestra. 

Quotebook
All rising to a great place is by a winding stair. 

Francis Bacon

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Nelly Bly’s real name was Elizabeth Cochran Seaman

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the NHL record for most in a game by anyone? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/November 14, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has a moderately funny exchange with a guest. Today’s Diary. 

Had a funny exchange – well, a sort of funny exchange – with a guest this morning…He came down to buy his half-off breakfast coupon for the restaurant and he had come down yesterday and I didn’t remember his name…I acknowledged this glaring hole in my hospitality and offered apologies. 

– Oh, don’t even…How many people do you see in a day???:
This is a standard response…The answer is usually two, but if they want to think I see hundreds of people every night, so be it. I was bending over a bit filling in his coupon and I stood up and made the sign of the cross in a manner that would’ve had the pope achieving and maintaining a state of arousal.
– Bless you my son…You are gracious.
– I mean, if this was a $5,000 a night palace…
– Hell, then I would know your blood type…

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 12: It’s the race for the most coveted trophy in sports: The Dan Henning Trophy, symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten supremacy. 

Here are some funny lines from this week’s NFL Bottom Ten: 

Giants earn Ed Koch Kup, symbolic of Gotham football ineptitude, with huge road loss to Jets that wasn’t secured until clutch fumble on final drive…

Falcons playing with B-10 fire, as with depth of 2019 B-10 field, even one (1) more win could spell disaster for title chances…

Focus important this week, as Browns cannot get caught looking ahead 11/24 showdown with Dolphins.

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
In 1889 – Nelly Bly, a reporter for the New York World, begins a trip to travel around the world in 80 days, an adventure inspired by Jules Verne’s 1873 novel Around the World in Eighty Days. Bly left Hoboken, New Jersey by ship and after arriving in England traveled through the Middle East and Asia before sailing to San Francisco and taking a train back to New York. It took Bly 72 days to make her journey, and she traveled and estimated 25,000 miles. 

In 1943 – Sid Luckman of the Chicago Bears establishes new NFL records for most passing yards and most touchdown passes in a game throwing for 433 yards and seven touchdowns in 56-7 win over the New York Giants. Luckman broke Cecil Isbell’s record of 333 yards in a game, established in 1942, and broke Sammy Baugh’s single-game touchdown record of six established two weeks earlier. Luckman’s touchdown record has been tied seven times, most recently by Drew Brees in 2015 while, Luckman’s single-game passing record has been topped many times, with the record now held by Norm Van Brocklin of the Los Angeles Rams, who threw for 554 yards in a 1951 game. 

In 1952 –  Al Martino has the first #1 song on the first British popular music chart, with Here in My Heart at #1 on the New Musical Express magaizne’s chart for the first of nine consecutive weeks. Over the years other sources published charts in Britain and the official British chart is now published by the Official Charts Company. Earlier, the song had peaked at #1 on Billboard’s Best Sellers in Stores chart. To date, there have been 1,359 #1 songs on the British chart and the current #1 song Dance Monkey by Tones and I, now in its sixth week at #1. 

Quotebook
No god who cared about his creation would abandon the innocent.

Cameron Todd Willingham

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Ray Mancini oringinally won the WBA lightweight title from Arturo Frias, with a first-round knock out on May 8, 1982. 

Today’s Stumper
What was Nelly Bly’s real name? – Answer next time!

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