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Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables – $3.99
A bloke runs courtesans in and out of palaces and 5-star hotel suites and runs afoul of the constables. Notable for unnamed protagonist, two lines of dialogue.
The Regular Guys – $3.99
Lenny and Larry, two comedians with careers going nowhere, team up to become the biggest act in show business.
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: A Vegas Memoir – $3.99
Join the graveyard crew of the Monte Carlo Security Department on the Las Vegas Strip. To get any closer to the action, you’d have to clock in and go to work yourself.
We The People: Making America America Again – $2.99
Gaylon, a past Libertarian nominee for the United States Senate and House, shows there is nothing wrong with our country that cannot be solved by concerned and conscientious citizens.


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The Daily Dose/Wednesday, June 26, 2019

The Daily Dose/June 26, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off is enjoying some time off and will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodySparrow manages to get the trash picked up despite forgetting to put it out when he got home from work. Today’s Diary.

I was lucky to get our trash picked up today…Like last week, I forgot to put it out, but I saw the trash guys still on the route on the way to the gym late this afternoon, so I stopped and  asked if they’d gotten to Maple Street yet…They yes but added they’d be happy to drive by again, so I turned around and sped back to The Shire to put the can out and I am pleased to report they did, indeed, swing by and empty it…Later, I told The Wife we should probably put a can of coffee or something out for them next week. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.


On This Date
In 1409 – The Roman Catholic Church finds itself with three popes – two more than usual – after Pope Alexander V is elected by the Council of Pisa in Pisa, Italy. He joined popes Gregory  XII in Rome and Benedict XIII in France. Known to History as the Western Schism, it began in 1378 when France got its shorts in a knot and began electing its own pope and really wouldn’t end until the middle of the following century. Alexander V would serve until his death 307 days later, Gregory XII until 1415 while Benedict XIII maintained his claim until his death 1423, and today is not regarded by the Church as a legitimate pope.

In 1970 – Frank Robinson of the Baltimore Orioles ties the major league record with two grand slam home runs as the Orioles defeat the Washington Senators – now the Texas Rangers – 12-2. The home runs came in the fifth and sixth innings and were Robinson’s only hits that night. Robinson became the seventh major league player to accomplish the feat, which has now been done 13 times, the last by Josh Hamilton of the Texas Rangers in 2009.

In 1961 – Gary U.S. Bonds is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 with Quarter to Three for the first of two consecutive weeks. Bonds was born Gary Anderson and his stage name was given to him by his producer Frank Guida, who hoped the name would be confused with public service announcements running at the time for actual US government bonds. It was Bonds’ second of seven Top 40 hits (from 1960 through 1982) and remains his only #1 song. Quarter to Three also peaked at #3 on Billboard’s soul chart.

Quotebook
“…but I expect you know best, as usual.”
“I do – When I know anything.”
J.R.R. Tolkien
The Lord of the Rings
Bilbo and Gandalf

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The United States Congress has not declared war since it decided to smack around Bulgaria, Romania and Hungary on June 5, 1942.

Today’s Stumper
Who were the first National and American league players to hit two grand slam home runs in one game? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 25

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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, June 25, 2019

The Daily Dose/June 25, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off is enjoying some time off and will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: It’s the latest from the hotel, plus it’s a leisurely day at the VSO. Today’s Diary.

The Halliburton crew works two shifts, twelve hours each, 5-to-5, and a couple of guys on the graveyard crew have started buying two breakfast coupons for the restaurant instead of one…They cost $10 each and have a $20 value in the restaurant and I could see growing boys coming off a graveyard shift in the oil fields requiring two vouchers…The restaurant is not cheap and even a regular appetite could set you back $18 or so and if you’re coming off twelve hours at the job site you could easily spend more than $20 and even if you don’t use the entire $40, you’re still saving a couple of bucks, key when you’re only making $50-$60 an hour, plus per diem. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.


On This Date
In 1950 – The Korean War begins when North Korea, after numerous border skirmishes, invades South Korea. On June 27 the United Nations (UN) recommended its member states provide military assistance to South Korea and later that day President Harry Truman authorized the use of US troops. Congress authorized funding for US involvement in August, though it did not declare war. 21 countries contributed to the UN effort, although 90% of the troops came from the United States. A military stalemate, an armistice was signed in July 1953, though the Koreas have yet to sign a peace treaty and remain formally at war. 

In 1999 – The San Antonio Spurs win their first NBA title defeating the New York Knicks 78-77 in Game 5 of the NBA Finals. Since this series, the Spurs have won four other titles – most recently in 2014 while this marks the last Knicks appearance in the Finals. It remains the latest date on which an NBA game has been played and this was the last Finals series where neither team scored 100 points in a game. 

In 1955 – Bo Diddley is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Rhythm and Blues Best Sellers chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks with Bo Diddley. Though Didley’s influence on rock and roll, especially its evolution from blues, is difficult to underestimate, he had indifferent chart success. He did place ten songs on Billboard’s soul chart, but he only had a handful of Hot 100 hits and only one of his albums hit the album chart. Diddley was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1987 and he died in 2008 at the age of 79. 

Quotebook
…and Stephen Douglas would still be alive. It was Chase’s view that men who get what they want in the world seldom die, prematurely, of pneumonia in Chicago.
Gore Vidal
Lincoln

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Before Isner/Mahut in 2010, the longest professional tennis match in history came in the first round of the 2004 French Open when Fabrice Santoro defeated Arnaud Clement 6-4, 6-3, 6-7, 3-6, 16-14 in 6 hours, 33 minutes.

Today’s Stumper
When was the last time the United States Congress declared war? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 24

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The Daily Dose/Monday, June 24, 2019

The Daily Dose/June 24, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodySparrow uses cleanser for the first time since Reconstruction. Today’s Diary.

Recall we had it last week, but I forgot to take Sparrow’s Top Secret Sausage Blend (STSSB) out of the freezer so the sauce only had ground beef in it, but tonight we were back to normal…I had the STSSB cut into their usual chunks and frying when The Wife got home from work and it was better than ever…Well, that may be an exaggeration, especially with my limited cooking skills, but it is tuff to beat a family Sunday dinner tradition…Heroically, if you ask me, I also did the dishes and even got the cleanser out to clean the stove, an occurrence on par with planetary alignment.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.


On This Date
In 1622 – The Battle of Macau, fought between Dutch and Portuguese forces, is fought, part of the Dutch-Portuguese War. The battle resulted in a decisive Portuguese victory, as the Dutch tried to gain control of Macau. The Dutch-Portuguese War was fought from 1602-63 and the Battle of Macau remains the only major battle fought between European powers on the Chinese mainland.

In 2010 – The longest match in the history of professional tennis ends as John Isner defeats Nicolas Mahut 6-4, 3-6, 6-7, 7-6, 70-68 in the first round of Wimbledon. The match had begun on June 22, continued on June 23 and the entire match took 183 games and 11 hours, 5 minutes, both records. In fact, at 138 games and 8 hours, 11 minutes the fifth set alone would have qualified for the longest match in history. Isner later would lose his second round match in just 73 minutes and withdrew from the doubles tournament, while Mahut lost his doubles match the following day.

In 1967 – Groovin’ by The Young Rascals is at #1 in Billboard’s Hot 100 for its second consecutive week and fourth and final week overall. The song had spent two weeks at #1 before being replaced by Aretha Franklin’s Respect for two weeks. The song also went to #1 in Canada, peaked at #3  on Billboard’s soul chart and was Billboard’s ninth biggest song of the year. It was the second #1 for the group, following 1966’s Good Lovin’ and the group would become The Rascals in 1968, hitting #1 again with People Got to be Free. 

Quotebook
There is not much sense in setting one’s foot upon the road and not traveling the fullest possible distance.
James Madison

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
1960 was the calendar year where the men’s 200-meter world record was broken or tied the most times. It was done five times, three times by Ray Norton and once each by Peter Radford and Stone Johnson.

Today’s Stumper
Before Isner and Mahut lost their minds, what was the longest match in the history of professional tennis? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 23

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The Daily Dose/Sunday, June 23, 2019

The Daily Dose/June 23, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
The very worst of the week that was:

  1. Free College – Beware of Democrats bearing gifts, as several 2020 presidential hopefuls trot out plan to woo, bribe younger voters…Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” it’s not government’s job to provide free college degrees, and who’s going to pay for it anyway? 
  2. Santa Anita Iconic LA-area track bravely hanging on until meet ends today, despite 30 deaths since opening Dec. 26…Total eight more than previous high this decade…No one knows why, either, with tracks all over US panting to host Breeder’s Cup after organizers ditch Santa Anita later this summer. 
  3. Presidential Conference Call – Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters signed up for conference call Tuesday with president of the United States, VA Secretary…Pollsters “more or less” certain invite had to with gig as county veteran service office, and that president, VA secretary don’t want to discuss Bottom Ten prospects for coming season. 
  4. NBA/NHL Drafts – Dear News Outlets: we’re mindful you have to have content every goddamned minute of the day, but from pre-draft first looks to ranking of prospects from mid-major Catholic schools named after 12 disciples to mock drafts for next five years, we have more than enough coverage.
  5. Illegal Immigrant Roundup – President Trump temporarily drops plan to arrest and deport every single illegal alien in country, which Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters are “pretty sure” wasn’t particularly practical to begin with…Perhaps we could let them stay and put them to work legally, without a path to citizenship…They could still build a life here, though they would be denied passports and the franchise, and the right to sponsor relatives, but who wants to bring relatives to this god-forsaken country right now, anyway?

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodyThe rains continue. Today’s Diary.

The rains are starting to take their toll…Not only is there some flooding around the area, but the gym had standing water in it when I was there tonight…I’m not Mr Flooring, but I’d say about half of the floor had some water on it…Most of it was located in areas that didn’t alter ol’ Sparrow’s workout, but it did affect one exercise, the tricep rope pullover…This involves standing with one foot well in front of the other and leaning forward and pulling a rope over your head…Now that I think about it the actual exercise wasn’t affected, but getting into and out of position required more care than I thought was prudent, so I stopped doing it after one set…I had a good workout otherwise: excellent strength, tho perhaps working out in a cold, damp basement wasn’t straight out of the Good Health Handbook. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

On This Date
In 1973 – A fire at a house in Hull, England kills a six-year-old boy. Initially ruled an accident, it was later determined to be the first in a series of deadly fires set by Bruce Lee, born Peter Dinsdale. Over the years Lee would kill 26 people in eleven fires, all thought to be accidents until his confession following his arrest in December 1979. Lee would plead not guilty to 26 counts of murder, but guilty to 26 counts of manslaughter and to eleven counts of arson. Now 58, Lee is serving a life sentence.

In 1996 – Michael Johnson breaks the 200-meter world record at the US Olympic Trials in Atlanta, running the race in 19.66 seconds, breaking the mark of 19.72 seconds established by Italy’s Pietro Mennea in 1979. Johnson would break his own record six weeks later at the 1996 Atlanta Summer Games, winning the gold medal with a time of 19.32 seconds and the record has been held since 2009 by Usain Bolt with a time of 19.19 seconds.

In 1973 – The Spinners are at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Best Selling Soul Singles chart – with One of a Kind (Love Affair). It was the third consecutive #1 hit for the group on the soul chart following Could it be I’m Falling in Love and I’ll Be Around was their third of six soul chart #1s. The song also peaked at #11 on Billboard’s Hot 100.

Quotebook
Oh, governor, I don’t matter. I am done for anyway. I was chosen to do a certain work, and I must do it, and then go.
Gore Vidal
Lincoln

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
England has won the World Cup once, in 1966, defeating West Germany 4-2 in extra time.

Today’s Stumper
Since 1951, what calendar year has seen the 200-meter world record broken the most times? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 22

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The Daily Dose/Saturday, June 22, 2019

The Daily Dose/June 22, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off:
This past Thursday an American drone, flying about 20 miles off the coast of Iran, was shot down by an Iranian surface-to-air missile. President Trump so far has declined to retaliate, wisely if you ask us. Lt General Joseph Guastella, commanding general of the US Air Force Central Command, called the attack:

Dangerous and escalatory…

Adding that:

This attack is an attempt to disrupt our ability to monitor the area following recent threats to international shipping and the free flow of commerce.

These statements are funny and you can believe them if you want. We don’t. It’s the typical government claptrap you would expect under the circumstances. One, it’s only dangerous and escalatory if we allow it to be. Let’s be honest, if their drones are flying around within 20 miles of the US coast, we’d probably shoot them down, too. And two, we would be surprised if the mission had anything to do with the free flow of commerce. It was a spying mission.

For many years America has been nothing more than this planet’s bully, willing and able to stick its nose wherever it saw fit. The result is a violent world. This should not be a surprise: violence begets violence and the only dividend America’s wars have produced is more war.

Friends, war and infernal US meddling is not working: we are not going to have a peaceful world without a peaceful America. We are not even going to have a peaceful America without a peaceful American government.

The years have shown the misery and destruction an America at war causes. We see it every day. The time has come for an America at peace. The time has come for you and me – we the people of the United States and of the world – to see the world that would be produced by an America at peace.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodySparrow has some laffs at the retailer with Mamadou, and it’s a rather slow day at the VSO.

Then I registered for a conference call with the president of the United States and VA secretary…I am not making that up, either…It’s next Tue morning and while I won’t be at the office, I can do this from home…I don’t have anything in particular to ask either man, but how often do you get to participate in a conference call with the president of the United States???

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

On This Date
In 1633 – Italian astronomer Galileo is found “vehemently suspect of heresy” by the Catholic Church for having the nerve to insist that the earth and other planets rotate around the sun. The Church, which believed the earth was the center of the universe, had been pestering Galileo since 1616 when it conducted its first inquisition against him. Galileo was sentenced to prison, which the following day was reduced to house arrest, where he died in 1642. In 1758 the Catholic Church would rescind its ban on books advocating heliocentrism, tho0ugh Galileo’s books weren’t formally removed from the list of banned books until 1758.

In 1986 – Argentina defeats England 2-1 in the quarterfinals of the World Cup, a match that produced two of the most famous goals in soccer history. At the 51 minute mark, Argentina’s Diego Maradona gave his country a 1-0 lead by scoring a goal with his hand – known to History as the Hand of God Goal – a violation of the rules not seen by referee Ali Bin Nasser of Tunisia. Four minutes later Maradona dribbled his way from his team’s zone through several English defenders for a goal History knows as the Goal of the Century. Later, Argentina would defeat West Germany 3-2 for the championship, while Bin Nasser never again worked the World Cup.

In 1963 – Sukiyaki by Kyu Sakamoto is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the second of three consecutive weeks, the first Asian to hit #1 in America. The song also went to #1 in Norway, Australia, Canada, and his native Japan and remains Sakamoto’s only Top 40 hit in America. While exact figures aren’t available, Sukiyaki is estimated to have sold over 13 million copies worldwide and is generally regarded as one of the 20 biggest selling singles in history. Sakamoto was one 520 people who died in the 1985 crash of Japan Airlines Flight 123.

Quotebook
When the time comes for truth to speak, it may choose an unfamiliar tongue; the task is to heed what is said.
Robertson Davies
The Lyre of Orpheus

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Medley by Stars on 45 interrupted a nine-week run at #1 by Bette Davis Eyes by Kim Carnes.

Today’s Stumper
How many times has England won the World Cup? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/June 21

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