The Daily Dose/July 23, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has the latest from the stabbing at the hotel, plus the crew runs roughshod over morning coffee service. Today’s Diary. 

What was funny with the Halliburton crew’s coffee service this morning is that very little coffee was consumed but boy, they did blow thru the creamers, all three, too: half and half, hazelnut and French vanilla…All were pillaged, it wasn’t safe for women and children and it was only because I was a trained professional that I was able to bring some order to the matter…What the hell was going on???…Were they only drinking creamer???…If so, did they use our provided cups, or were they doing shots???…How in theeee hell to you use a dozen creamers, at least, and two drops of coffee???

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

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On This Date
In 1983 – What History now refers to as the Gimli Glider, actually Air Canada Flight 143, lands without fuel at a former Royal Canadian Air Force Base near Gimli, Manitoba. All 69 people on board survived, though ten were injured while being evacuated. Flight 143 was on it’s way from Montreal to Edmonton and plane ran out of fuel because the amount of fuel needed had been calculated in pounds instead of kilograms. 

In 2009 – Mark Bruehle of the Chicago White Sox throws the 18th perfect game in major league history, retiring all 27 Tampa Bay Rays he faces in a 5-0 White Sox victory. The perfect game was saved by a splendid defensive play by center fielder DeWayne Wise, who stole a home run from Gabe Kapler leading off the ninth inning. Wise scaled the fence in left-center field, had possession of the ball, then lost and only caught the ball on his way down. The Catch, as it is known in Chicago, is commemorated on the outfield at the spot it happened. 

In 1977 – Barry Manilow is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third and final time as Looks Like We Made It is at the top for its only week. The song as written by Will Jennings and Richard Kerr and also charted in Canada, where it peaked at #9, and in Australia, where it peaked at #91. It was Manilow’s sixth of eleven Top 10 hits and the seventh of the then-record eighteen consecutive Top 40 hits that started his career.

Quotebook
So they redefined evil…In the meantime the family on the summit was haunted by the sight of white relatives in slavery to them.
Henry Wiencek
Master of the Mountain: Thomas Jefferson and His Slaves

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Lance Armstrong and Floyd Landis are the two Americans who have Tour de France titles stripped from them.

Today’s Stumper
How many Chicago White Sox pitchers have thrown perfect games? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/July 21, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
The very best of the worst of the week that was:

1. Apollo 11 – 50th anniversary of man’s greatest adventure – a line of demarcation as triumphant as it is difinitive – now merely a stark reminder of how little America has accomplished since then…Forget going to Mars, America can no longer put anyone into space anymore.  
2. US Media – Instead of having blathering billionaire out of 2016 GOP presidential race before primaries, once-proud institution ushered him straight to the White House and our planet is the worse for it…Worse, by legitimizing lying, sexual predator, he is likely to be re-elected next year…Also, temperatures in the 90’s, in July at least, aren’t news…It’s summer, it gets hot…It happens every year. 
3. American Electorate – Thanks to our two major parties, we’ve been herded into pens labeled either Racist or Socialst…And we’re taking it…Our fractured, bickering government merely a reflection of ourselves….We deserve better than this, but we are not demanding it. 
4. Travis Arnaud – Baseball player being heralded for being first catcher ever to hit three home runs in game while batting leadoff…Pipe down, folks…This isn’t a record, merely a curiosity that should have been mentioned in game notes section and not headline. 
5. Trump Fact Check – Click here for latest misinformation from a president either unable or unwilling to tell the truth, something else we are tolerating, even though we deserve better. 

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: There’s a new item at the hotel’s sundry stand. Today’s Diary. 

The big news at the sundry stand is we are now offering a new item: iced lemon loaf cake…It’s kept frozen and, as a service to our guests of course, I tried one…It was pretty good…Not fresh-from-the-oven good, but not too far from it, either…It’s in the far right corner of the freezer, bottom shelf, and to make room for it we pushed the Hot Pockets to the left. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

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On This Date
In 1983 – The lowest temperature ever recorded in an inhabited spot, -128.6 F, is recorded at Vostok Station in Antarctica. Satellite observations have recorded lower temperatures on Antarctica, but this remains the lowest directly measured temperature at an inhabited place on Earth.

In 1892 – For the first time in major league history, two 300-game winners oppose each other in the same game as Tim Keefe of the Philadelphia Phillies defeats Pud Galvin of the St Louis Browns 2-0. This would not happen again until Don Sutton (California Angels) and Tom Seaver (Chicago White Sox) met in 1986 and has happened several times since.

In 1973 – Jim Croce is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with Bad, Bad, Leroy Brown. The song, inspired by someone Croce knew in the Army, also went to #1 in Canada and was Billboard’s second biggest song of the year. It was the first two #1s for Croce, who died before his next #1, Time In a Bottle, went to #1 in December.

Quotebook
The greatest chance that can come to man or woman is the chance to do something worth doing…The days that are happy are the hard days where effort is crowned at the end.
Theodore Roosevelt
6/1/1906

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The last major league pitcher to win and lose 20 games in the same season was Phil Niekro of the Atlanta Braves, who went 21-20 in 1979.

Today’s Stumper
What is the lowest temperature recorded in Africa? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/July 20, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
50 years ago today man landed and walked on the moon for the first time. Regardless of whatever else we accomplish, Apollo 11 will always be one of our species landmark achievements. 

Like most days times in our nation’s history, July 20, 1969 was a chaotic time. The 1960’s had seen two Kennedy brothers had been assassinated, blacks, and others, were demanding things whites weren’t prepared to give and we were mired in the battle about whether or not to fight the Vietnam War. Postage was six cents, gas was 35 cents a gallon and the average American made about $8,500 a year, roughly 42 cents, $2.43 and 58,000 in today’s money.

Apollo 11 is our earliest memory. I was three-and-a-half and still living with my parents, in an apartment in Downey, California. Like more or less everyone else, we had an old black and white TV for whom I was the remote control. If you remember Apollo 11 you are in the minority, because only about 21% of Americans can. 

Two members of Apollo 11 are still alive, Buzz Aldrin and Michael Collins, and of the twelve men who have walked on the moon, only four are still alive. Aldrin, at 89, is the oldest. Charles Duke, 83, is the youngest. 

NASA, of course, had a dozen astronauts capable of riding on Apollo 11, but we’ve always felt Deke Slayton made three good choices for the crew of man’s first lunar landing. 

Though a former Navy pilot, Neil Armstrong was a civilian when he commanded Apollo 11. He once said he would have been happy doing whatever NASA wanted him to do, but we’re pretty well read on Armstrong and we would not die of shock had he felt he was the best man for the job. Content with his place in history, and a bit dull and reticent besides, Armstrong was content to let his mission’s accomplishment speak for itself. 

Buzz Aldrin’s sheer genius at docking and other aspects of space travel made him an ideal member of the crew.  Someone, perhaps Armstrong, though we can’t remember anymore, once said Aldrin appeared to be more peeved at not being the first man to walk on the moon than he was happy to have been the second. His book Return to Earth chronicles his post-Apollo depression and alcohol battles and is a good read. 

Michael Collins, the command module pilot who stayed in orbit around the moon, isn’t going to lie to you: he said he did not have the best seat on Apollo 11, but he also admits he is completely satisfied and pleased with his role, adding he turned down an opportunity to return to and walk on the moon. His book Carrying the Fire was a good read. 

Fifty years after Apollo 11 America cannot even put humans into space anymore and it is hard to tell how History, decades and centuries down the line, will look at this. That’s an argument for other people at another time, though. Regardless of History’s  judgment, July 20, 1969, will always be remembered as a – perhaps the – landmark day in our human experience.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has a slow day at the VSO, and his stomach is still sending mixed signals. 

My stomach is still a bit tender from my Calzone gorge-fest last Monday…I came home from work rather hungry because I didn’t bring a lunch and I had a couple of sandwiches, one chicken and one peanut butter and peach jam and my stomach started objecting shortly thereafter…I don’t know why…I mean, I’ve been feeding it two sandwiches at a time since I was in diapers…It’s accustomed to it…But it was rebelling anyway.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

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On This Date
In 1969 – Man reaches another heavenly body for the first time as Apollo 11 lands on the moon. The landing was fraught with some peril. At about 30,000 feet above the lunar surface, the lunar module’s computer kept announcing it was overworked and the mission only continued because someone at mission control knew what they were doing and said it was OK to continue. The LM did not have unlimited fuel, either, and Eagle landed just a few seconds before what was known as the ‘bingo call”, when they would have 20 seconds to land or abort. Six-and-a-half hours later Neil Armstrong became the first human to walk on the moon and 20 minutes later Buzz Aldrin became the second. Neither found moving on the moon difficult, though both reported they found it useful to plan their movements a few steps ahead. The two spent two-and-a-half hours walking on the moon and all told spent 21 hours on the lunar surface. The landing happened 2,983 days after President Kennedy had called for the United States to land on the moon. 

In 1973 – Wilbur Wood of the Chicago White Sox starts both games of a doubleheader against the New York Yankees. Wood wasn’t a puzzle in either game, losing both as the Yankees swept 12-2 and 7-0, dropping Wood’s record to 18-14 for the season. Wood finished the year 24-20 and is one of ten major league pitchers since 1900 to both win and lose 20 games in a season and he remains the last major league pitcher to start both games a doubleheader. 

In 1969 – Perhaps appropriately, Zager and Evans are at #1 when man first lands on the moon, one day into the second week of their six-week reign at the top with In The Year 2525. It would be the only chart appearance for Zager and Evans, making them one of the Hot 100’s ultimate one-hit wonders: an act whose only chart single went to #1. They achieved this feat in Great Britain as well, the only act to do so in both countries.

Quotebook
We copy you down, Eagle.
Charlie Duke
Mission Control, Houston, seconds before:

Houston…Tranquility base here. The Eagle has landed.
Neil Armstrong
Commander, Apollo 11
July 20, 1969

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
519 women competed at the 1952 Helsinki Summer Olympics.

Today’s Stumper
Who was the last major league pitcher to both win and lose 20 games in the same season? – Answer next time!

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Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Friday, July 19
I spent part of the morning at the veteran service office (VSO) following up on what I was working on Wednesday, trying to help a veteran get appointments with a civilian doctor scheduled by another contractor than the one who is making them now…Recall the current contractor does not have a doctor in town and the second one does and the veteran is too frail to travel to the big city. 

Continue reading →

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The Daily Dose/July 19, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: The Sparrows hire a maid to help clean the house and later go out to dinner in the next county. Today’s Diary.

This reminded me of the time I actually broke down and hired a maid…This was back in the bachelor days in Sin City and interest and opportunity had coincided and a chick was coming over and it had been a while since a chick had come over and I seemed to recall having a clean pad would be mission-critical to scoring…The pad was my usual pigsty and it took two professional cleaners several hours – no small amount of which was spent in the bathroom – to get it even remotely presentable.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

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On This Date
In 1963 – Joe Walker, a NASA test pilot, flies the hypersonic, rocket powered X-15 aircraft to an altitude of 347,800 feet, well high enough to qualify as human spaceflight, making Walker, a former US Air Force pilot, the first civilian in space. The flight took place over southern California and lasted 12 minutes. Walker would duplicate the feat the following year becoming the first human to reach space twice and he died in 1965 in a midair collision. 

In 1952 – The Games of the 15th Summer Olympics begin in Helsinki, Finland. 69 nations sent 4,955 athletes who competed in 17 sports. Among other feats, Bob Mathias of the United States became the first athlete to defend his decathlon title and the US basketball team defeated the Soviet Union, making their first Olympic appearance, 36-25 in the gold medal game. Helsinki had originally been awarded the 1940 Summer Games, replacing Tokyo, which were ultimately canceled due to World War II, and remains the northern-most city to host the Summer Games. 

In 1980 – Billy Joel is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me. The song was Joel’s 13th chart single, his 11th Top 40 hit, his 4th Top 10 hit and his first #1. The song also went to #1 in Canada and was Billboard’s 9th biggest hit of 1980. To date, Joel has had two other #1 songs on the Hot 100:  Tell Her About It (1983) and We Didn’t Start the Fire (1989).  

Quotebook
Great events make me quiet and calm; it is only trifles that irritate my nerves.
Queen Victoria

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Nadia Comaneci won the following gold medals at the 1976 Montreal Olympics: individual all-around, uneven bars and balance beam.

Today’s Stumper
How many women competed at the 1952 Helsinki Summer Games? – Answer next time!

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