The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 1

Posted on August 30, 2023 by Gaylon

The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 1
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™ 

Game on. 

As Bottom Ten contenders and pretenders announce “we’ve got next’ in their quest for the most coveted trophy in sports – The Dan Henning Trophy, symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten supremacy – Bottom Ten fan(s) everywhere have a spring in their step because they know there will be no shortage of lousy teams this year and the 2023 race for The Dan Henning Trophy – symbolic of NFL Bottom Ten supremacy – may well be the tightest ever. 

And between the defending champion Bears, the Rams, not to mention the entire AFC South, there will be no shortage of losing streaks, upset losses, and called-back touchdowns to keep everyone on the edge of their seat(s). 

The opening week imbroglio:

1. Chicago Bears (3-14) – Defending B-10 champions, Bears have league-best ten (10) game losing streak, which B-10 pollsters respect so much they are content to let them remain in top spot until they actually win…Opening Loss: Green Bay

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The Diary of a Nobody/August 29

Posted on August 30, 2023 by Gaylon
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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, August 29, 2023

Posted on August 29, 2023 by Gaylon

The Daily Dose/August 29, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The Daily Dose is on hiatus. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has had a good couple of days in sack. Maybe too good. Today’s Diary. 

…and 15.0 hours for the week, a rather high total that already has us fretting over how the all-you-can get Tuesday Sleep Session (TSS) will go.

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 1 – And they’re off! The race for the ESPNCup begins with turnovers, missed tackles, and false starts already at a fever pitch. The Bottom Ten is free for the first couple of weeks.

B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” they’d prefer more returning starters for Wildcats, but there was such a lack of depth in 2022 and the holes should be easy enough to fill.

Commodores still struggling from turn-of-century decision to combine Athletic, Student Affairs departments, with Divinity School students replacing playbooks with catechisms to teach players to fear and love God and not jump offsides.

In order to offset home-field advantage by playing Fighting Irish in Ireland, 2024 matchup scheduled to be played in reactor compartment of USS Ronald Reagan.

———

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The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 1

Posted on August 29, 2023 by Gaylon

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 1
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™ 

Even though only a handful of games have been played, Bottom Ten pollsters are already tackling the tough questions: Can Northwestern repeat and become the first team to repeat as Bottom Ten champions twice? Can this week’s #1, New Mexico State, run the table? Will a team not ranked this week come out of nowhere to claim their share of B-10 glory? 

Also, last week it was announced the FOX Golden Checkbook had replaced the ESPNCup as the title hardware issued to the NCAA Bottom Ten champion. That has proven to be unworkable, and Bottom Ten pollsters are somewhat pleased to announce the return of the ESPNCup. 

This week’s mess: 

1. New Mexico State (0-1; lost to UMess 41-30)
Mitigating Factors: Loss to 2022 B-10 medal stand laureate puts Aggies dead center on B-10’s patented TitleTrak Radar, not that they’re ever too far away from it…Aggies start campaign 0-1 for seventh straight season, eighth of last 14, and, well, you get the idea.
FunFact: Aggies can become team to beat, literally, for B-10 title with loss to lower level team this week.  
Next Loss: Illinois State

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The Diary of a Nobody/August 28

Posted on August 29, 2023 by Gaylon
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The Daily Dose/Monday, August 28, 2023

Posted on August 28, 2023 by Gaylon

The Daily Dose/August 28, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The hiatus of The Daily Dose rolls on!

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has more printer problems at the hotel. Today’s Diary. 

This seems to be a violation of the Printer Bylaws, which state you print the entire goddamn job at once, and we weren’t able to fix this problem, either…

 

———

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The Diary of a Nobody/August 27

Posted on August 28, 2023 by Gaylon
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The Daily Dose/Sunday, August 27, 2023

Posted on August 27, 2023 by Gaylon

The Daily Dose/August 27, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The Daily Dose is on hiatus.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

It’s Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has a good day in the sack. Today’s Diary. 

We woke up at 1630 feeling pretty good and while a patented Sparrow Roll Over (SRO) wasn’t executed, we did lie there for two hours…We recall dreaming, so some of that time was spent asleep, so we feel comfortable tacking the extra hour onto our total…

———

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The Diary of a Nobody/August 26

Posted on August 27, 2023 by Gaylon

Yay for Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Saturday, August 26
Gina announced that the printers weren’t working properly at the front desk, specifying that they weren’t printing directly from The System, you had to Preview them first…(Later, Preview didn’t always work, obliging us to hit File and then print from that.)…This is a moderate pain in the arse, but nothing we can’t work around and, in finest Sparrow tradition, deferred looking into the matter until later in the shift, tho it is something we would be expected to look into and not leave for day shift.

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The Daily Dose/Saturday, August 26, 2023

Posted on August 26, 2023 by Gaylon

The Daily Dose/August 26, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

The hiatus continues. The Daily Dose will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has the latest issue with the new county building. Today’s Diary. 

The contractor working on the matter could be heard shuffling in and out all day and – because everyone can hear everything in the building – even violating the Second Commandment on occasion by using the name of the human form of the Holy Trinity in a manner inconsistent with praise…

———

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