The Daily Dose/September 11, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

HERE WE GO: The great lesson of life is the years pass. We can use this time to either try and make some things happen for ourselves or we can fart around and watch them pass. So it is hardly a bulletin that today is the 20th anniversary of 9/11. 

Get Your Official Daily Dose Policy Right Here: The great lesson of History is that American meddling in the affairs of other countries seldom yields a dividend and the 9/11 attacks should never have happened.

Fly In The Ointment: One, had we not been butting in in the Middle East members of al-Qaeda would have had no reason to fly airplanes into our buildings. 

Batting Second: Two, as the official 9/11 report and other research has made clear, America had sufficient information to know about the attacks – like, for example, Arab students taking flying lessons in Arizona blowing off their landing lessons. America, however, didn’t know what it knew. Lots of people had lots of information, but no one person knew everything and we were unable to stop people from flying airplanes into our buildings. 

Warm, Personal Remembrance: We were living in Las Vegas at the time and without a TV we found out about the attacks, after sleeping through them, on a message board we hung out at. The first TV coverage we saw was at the gym and our jaws dropped as much as yours did. We also remember umpiring some youth baseball that night because fall baseball in Las Vegas is more important than stopping to reflect on great and historical occurrences. 

Stop Us If You’ve Heard This Before: America has been at war continuously since invading Panama in 1989 and we don’t think you can argue with this statement: 

If America had been at peace every day since 1989 instead of at war every day, 9/11 would not have happened, ISIS would not exist and we would not have been in Afghanistan in the first place. 

The Bottom Line: The only dividend war provides is more war. It’s time to see the world produced by an America at peace, an America that gives other nations the dignity of conducting their affairs without US interference. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has the end-of-the-week update from The Portfolio. Today’s Diary. 

The penny weed stock was up almost two-tenths of a cent today, which made me $3.01, tho it’s down about ten bucks since I bought in…Just for funsies, I did some research into what percentage of the company my 2,150 shares gets me and it turned out there are over 271 million shares out there, so my percentage is/isn’t squat, tho I don’t suppose ol’ Sparrow’s percentage of ownership isn’t interesting to anyone but ol’ Sparrow. 

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It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
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On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1789 – Alexander Hamilton takes office as the first treasury secretary of the United States. Hamilton’s influence lead to the creation of, among other things, the US Mint and what would eventually become the US Coast Guard and his influence on American government remains profound. Hamilton served for six years and died after being shot in a duel with then-Vice President Aaron Burr in 1804. 

In 1912 – Eddie Collins of the Philadelphia Athletics establishes a new modern major league record for most stolen bases in a game in a 9-7 victory over the Detroit Tigers. Collins had six stolen bases, breaking the record of five that had been done four times previously, including once by Collins on May 18. Collins would match the feat on Sept 22 and the mark has been equaled three times since. The all-time record is seven, done twice, by George Gore of the Chicago Cubs in 1881 and Billy Hamilton of the Philadelphia Phillies in 1894. 

In 1965 – James Brown is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Rhythm and Blues Singles chart – for the fifth of eight consecutive weeks with Papa’s Got a Brand New Bag. It was the second of 17 #1 soul songs for Brown and his 27th of 119 soul hits. The song also peaked at #8 on the Hot 100, at #25 in Great Britain and won the Grammy Award for Best Rhythm and Blues Recording. In 1969, a version by Otis Redding peaked at #10 on the soul chart and at #21 on the Hot 100. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

I understood that I had to go. I had to meet my fate.
Ernst Weiss
Georg Letham, Physician and Murderer

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Guns N’ Roses had two #1 albums on the Billboard 200 chart: Appetite for Destruction (four weeks, 1988) and Use Your Illusion II (two weeks, 1992). 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How many secretaries of the treasury have later served as chief justice of the United States? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/September 10, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off is appearing intermittently while we work on a project.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow loses his mind. Today’s Diary. 

The cabin got – get this – a Level III cleaning today…I am not making that up…Dishes, laundry and vacuuming made it a Level II cleaning, of course, but yours truly also got a trash bag and threw out not only stuff that accumulated around the house, including my desk, but yours truly also cleared out the refrigerator of crap that was no longer being used, of there was no small amount of…The truth is the frig was starting to smell a bit and no wonder because some of the stuff had expiration dates from last decade. 

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1846 – American Elias Howe is award US patent #4,750 for the lockstitch sewing machine. Howe came up with the idea for his sewing machine while apprenticing with a precision instrument repairman, though it took several years, including a five-year (1849-54) lawsuit against Issac Singer, before he began making any money off his patent. Despite ill health, Howe served as regimental postmaster with the 17th Connecticut Volunteer Infantry during the Civil War. 

In 1972 – Yugoslavia wins the first Olympic team handball gold medal, defeating Czechoslovakia 21-16 at the Munich Summer Games. It was the first of two gold medals for Yugoslavia – which broke up in 2003 – and South Korea’s silver medal in 1988 remains the only men’s medal won by a non-European country. The US lost to Denmark in the 13th-place game at Munich and women began playing Olympic team handball at Montreal in 1976. 

In 1988 – Guns N’ Roses is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with Sweet Child o’ Mine. It was the second chart single for the group, their second of four consecutive Top 10 hits – and second of six overall – and remains their only #1 song. The song also peaked at #6 in Great Britain and was Billboard’s 5th-biggest song of the year. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

The last and most important freedom left to a man is the freedom to be his own master.
Ernst Weiss
Georg Letham, Physician and Murderer

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The New York Jets, New England Patriots, Buffalo Bills, Denver Broncos and the Los Angeles Chargers are the original AFL teams still active in their original cities/geographical areas. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How many #1 albums has Guns N’ Roses had in the United States? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here. 

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The Daily Dose/September 9, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off is appearing intermittently while we work on a project. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow gets a call from his friend Jeffrey and they talk about their spades game from this past April. 

Yours truly also advised him that had I been allowed to go 10-for-2, he would have gone down harder than a whore with the fleet in, an original, funny line yours truly came up with ages ago…Unfortunately, between his inebriated state and a mediocre phone connection, Jeffrey was very confused by this line, understanding “whore” but not really comprehending “fleet”. 

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1839 – John Herschel of England takes the first glass plate photograph, a shot of his father’s 40-foot telescope at Slough, England, a process so groundbreaking and useful it was used in astronomy until the 1930s. Herschel was also an eminent astronomer and mathematician who also invented blueprints and coined the term photography. The first photograph in history had been taken in 1826 or 1827 in Paris, where light had been etched onto bitumen spread over pewter. 

In 1960 – The first American Football League (AFL) game is played when the Denver Broncos defeat the Boston Patriots 13-10 in Boston, the league’s first points coming on a Gino Cappelletti field goal. The Houston Oilers defeated the San Diego Chargers 24-16 for the first AFL title and the league began sending its champion to the Super Bowl following the 1966 season and merged with the NFL following the 1969 season. 

In 1967 – Ode to Billy Joe by Bobbie Gentry is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third of four consecutive weeks. It was the first chart single for Gentry, her first of four Top 40 hits and remains her only #1 song. The song is one of the few that made the Top 40 on all three major Billboard singles charts, peaking at #8 on the soul chart and at #17 on the country chart. The song also peaked at #13 in Great Britain, was Billboard’s third-biggest song of the year and it returned to the Hot 100 in 1976, peaking at #54. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Most terrible of all was that…I had no hope of hope anymore.
Ernst Weiss
Georg Letham, Physician and Murderer

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Margaret Court finished second at the US Open once, in 1963 when she lost to Maria Bueno of Brazil 7-5, 6-4

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Of the eight original AFL teams, how many are still active in their original cities/geographical areas? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here. 

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/September 8, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off is appearing intermittently while we work on another reader-depleting project. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – At the hotel, Sparrow makes one of his famous tough calls. Today’s Dairy.

Regular readers of this crap are aware of my raw powers as nite auditor: I am empowered, even expected, to make this decision; no member of management is expecting a call from me on this one so, after staring at morning coffee service in my usual fashion – crossly with my hands on my hips – yours truly decides to toss the old stirrers and start fresh with the new, larger ones.  

The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 2 – The Interregnum Poll – It’s the American classic, necessitated by the pros starting a week later than the colleges, as always featuring The Jim Hanifan Memorial Medallion – symbolic of NFL preseason ineptitude – plus the usual witless social commentary the country has come to know and tolerate. – The Bottom Ten is free through the Week 3 surveys. 

8. Interregnum – Archaic word that usually describes a gap in something, makes only US appearance outside of time between presidential election, inauguration…From Latin ‘inter” (among, between) and ‘regnum’ (reign)…B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” knowledge of this sort is why they don’t get too many dates. 

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1923 – Nine US Navy destroyers run aground on the California coast north of Santa Barbara, with seven of the ships sinking and 23 sailors dying. The ships were part of a 14-ship flotilla going from San Francisco to San Diego and were traveling in foggy conditions and had not had a fixed position for over ten hours. History refers to the incident as the Honda Point Disaster and it remains the largest peacetime loss of US Navy ships. 

In 1973 – Margaret Court of  Australia wins the US Open tennis tournament, defeating Evonne Goolagong 7-6, 5-7, 6-2. For Court, it was her fifth US Open title and her 24th Grand Slam singles title – a total that includes both Open era and pre-Open era wins – a total that remains a record for both genders. Court also won 19 Grand Slam doubles titles and 21 Grand Slam mixed doubles titles and her 64 combined Grand Slam titles are also a record for both genders. 

In 1979 – The Knack is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third of six consecutive weeks with My Sharona. It was the first chart single for the group, their first of three Top 40 hits and remains their only #1 song. The song also went to #1 in Australia and Canada and peaked at #6 in Great Britain. It was Billboard’s biggest song of the year, its 15th biggest of the decade and ranked 95th on their 60th Anniversary Hot 100 in 2018. The song re-entered the Hot 100 in 1994, peaking at #91. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

No one who has not experienced it could imagine the boundless exhaustion and enervation produced by being constantly face to face with oneself.
Ernst Weiss
Georg Letham, Physician and Murderer

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Vincent Matthews of the US won two Olympic gold medals: 4×400-meter relay at Mexico City in 1968 and the 400-meters at Munich in 1972. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How many times did Margaret Court finish second in the US Open? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here. 

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/September 7, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

Leading Off is appearing intermittently while we work on a project. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow continues his whining. Today’s Diary. 

Proof that ol’ Sparrow will whine about absolutely anything – as if further proof were required – can be found in the fact that he was whining about how warm it was getting and the jacket and gloves he’d worn weren’t really needed…On the plus side, tho, a modest sweat was worked up. 

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 2 – Perhaps the deepest Bottom Ten field ever chases the most coveted trophy in sports: the ESPNCup – symbolic of NCAA Bottom Ten supremacy. – The Bottom Ten is free through the Week 3 surveys. 

Navy hampered by pregame Navy Secretary speech urging defense to “not tackle until you see the backs of their jerseys”…

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1812 – The French, led by Napoleon, and the Russians engage in the Battle of Borodino about 60 miles west of Moscow. Part of France’s invasion of Russia, the battle ended with a French victory and the French occupied Moscow later in the month. Napoleon, though, had problems feeding his army and ended up retreating, a move that itself caused significant losses and the invasion ended in December with a Russian victory.  

In 1972 – Vince Matthews of the US wins the 400-meters at Munich Summer Olympics in 44.66 seconds, defeating fellow American Wayne Collett. As a protest against the struggles of Black Americans, both Matthews and Collett acted casually on the medal stand, chatting, not facing the flag and generally acting disinterested. Both were expelled from the Games, leaving the US unable to field a 4×400 relay team. 

In 1974 – Barry White is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of three consecutive weeks with Can’t Get Enough of Your Love, Babe. It was the second of six soul #1s for White and his fifth of 14 soul Top 10s. The song would later spend one week at #1 on the Hot 100 and also peaked at #8 in Great Britain and in 1993 a version by Taylor Dayne peaked at #20 on the Hot 100. In 1973, White’s Love Unlimited Orchestra also hit #1 on the Hot 100 and #10 on the soul chart with Love’s Theme. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

“I couldn’t stand there and sing the words because I don’t believe they’re true. I wish they were. I believe we have the potential to have a beautiful country, but I don’t think we do.”
Wayne Collett
US Olympian
9/7/72

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The first British act to have a #1 song on the Hot 100 was Mr Acker Bilk who spent one week at #1 in 1962 with Stranger on the Shore.  

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How many gold medals did Vincent Matthews win in his career? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here.  

Share Gaylon! Go!