The Daily Dose/November 11, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Editor’s Note: today’s Leading Off item originally ran – with a few minor changes – on Veterans Day 2017. It was rehashed in 2019 and is offered again today and regular readers of this crap know the possibility of seeing it again in 2022 cannot be entirely dismissed. 

TEN HUT!: You know, honestly, we cannot remember Veterans Day being the big deal it is today while growing up. And we come from a family of many veterans.

9/11 changed that, of course, because since 9/11 – when first responders became heroes – the reverence for veterans has grown, too. We are routinely thanked for our service now, which never used to happen before 9/11, and on Veterans Day we could scam complimentary meals left and right if moved so to do.

FunFact: We generally don’t go out of our way to do that, though. On the other hand, we don’t throw a tantrum if we’re not presented with a check.

What A Surprise, Dry, Technical Matter. November 11 has been an American holiday since 1938, born out of the earlier celebrations of the armistice that ended the major fighting in World War I  at 11 am on November 11, 1918. Originally known as Armistice Day, it became Veterans Day in 1954.

War Is Hell: Fighting continued right up until the eleventh hour, too. Some units didn’t want to make themselves vulnerable by yielding an advantage while some didn’t want to have to haul their ammo away why others wanted the best possible position should fighting start again. In all, over 2,700 men died on November 11, including a Canadian two minutes before peace took effect and an American at 10:59.

USA! USA!: Life in the service was pretty routine for most of us. Personally, we served on an old diesel submarine, the USS Blueback, the last diesel combat submarine in the United States Navy. We’re still pretty young and if we get regular exercise and watch between-meal treats we one day we might well be the last diesel boat veteran in this country.

Fly In The Ointment: Some, of course, did not serve routine tours. Some died in the service of their country and some contributed exploits we are still talking about today. Some are not entirely pleased with their service and too many are homeless and each day an average of 22 vets will kill themselves, choosing to continue their service on heaven’s parade ground.

The Bottom Line: Looking back at honorable service to your country is one of life’s great prizes. We are the son, brother, grandson, cousin and nephew of veterans and we hardly have an exclusive on that. You’re welcome. It was our privilege. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – At the hotel, the keyboard at the back office desk is a mess. Today’s Diary. 

…it looked like it had been used as a serving platter…Not only were there crumbs all over the place, but there was some gunk on the keyboard which is bad for morale because it’s good policy to be suspicious of gunk on a keyboard…

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On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1911 – A freak weather phenomenon causes many cities in the US Midwest to experience record highs and lows on the same day. In Springfield, Missouri the temperature went from 80 degrees at 3:45 pm to 40 degrees in 15 minutes and would fall to 13 degrees at midnight. In Rock County, Wisconsin a blizzard followed a tornado within an hour and in Chicago people died of both heatstroke and cold. History refers to the episode as the Great Blue Norther or 11/11/11. 

In 1981 – The Minnesota North Stars become the second NHL team since the red line was implemented in 1943 to score 15 goals in a game in a 15-2 win over the Winnipeg Jets. After a Jets goal at the 5:02 mark in the second period made it 4-2, the North Stars scored the final eleven goals. The only other teams to score at least 15 goals in a game are the Detroit Red Wings (15; 1/23/44) and the Montreal Canadiens (16; 3/3/1920)

In 1978 – Chaka Khan is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as Hot Soul Singles Chart – for the first of three consecutive weeks with I’m Every Woman. It was her first solo hit after several years with the group Rufus and was her first of six #1 soul songs. The song also peaked at #21 on the Hot 100 and at #11 in Great Britain and in 1993 a version by Whitney Houston peaked at #4 on the Hot 100 and at #5 on the soul chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

I have always thought that one man of tolerable abilities may work great changes, if he first forms a good plan, and makes the execution of that same plan his sole study and business.
Benjamin Franklin
Autobiography

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The NHL record for the most tie games in a season is 24, by the 1969-70 Philadelphia Flyers. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was Chaka Khan’s biggest hit on the Hot 100? – Answer next time!  

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The Daily Dose/November 10, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow continues to sleep very well. Today’s Diary. 

Not only is yours truly sleeping longer as of late, but I’m also falling asleep more quickly, too…God bless all of you.

The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 11 – The race for the most coveted trophy in sports The Dan Henning Trophy – rolls on.

Bears show mastery of sportsmanship fundamentals with key taunting penalty to extend Steeler drive that led to field goal…

Sensibly playing to lose on the road, Vikings blow 17-3 lead…

Dolphins prove old NFL adage that on any given Sunday pretty much anyone can smack around the Houston Texans…

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Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1674 – What is now part of the east coast of the US – then known as New Netherland – becomes British territory after being surrendered by the Dutch. The surrender was part of the Treaty of Westminster, which ended the 3rd Anglo-Dutch War that resulted had actually resulted in a Dutch victory, with logistical reasons causing the Dutch to surrender what eventually became parts of New York, New Jersey, Delaware, Connecticut, Pennsylvania and Rhode Island.

In 1942 – The New York Rangers defeat the Chicago Blackhawks 5-3 in the NHL’s last overtime game for over 40 years. The league decided to abolish overtime – then a single 10-minute period – due to wartime travel restrictions. Overtime returned for the 1983-84 season when a 5-minute, sudden-death period was introduced, with the first overtime gams coming on Oct 10, 1983, between the Detroit Red Wings and Winnipeg Jets and the Minnesota North Stars and the Los Angeles Kings. Both games ended in ties. 

In 1958 – Conway Twitty is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two non-consecutive weeks with It’s Only Make Believe. The song also went to #1 in Canada and Great Britain and peaked at #12 on Billboard’s soul chart. It was the first of nine Top 40 pop hits for Twitty, his first of three soul hits and remains his only #1 song on the Hot 100. Twitty would not start hitting the country chart until 1966.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Our knowledge is a receding mirage in an expanding desert of ignorance.
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization, Vol. VI: The Reformation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Union Civil War general whose name inspired a euphemism for prostitute was Major General Joseph Hooker. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Which team holds the NHL record for most ties in a season? – Answer next time!  

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/November 9, 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

OH HELL: Regular readers of this crap know our fascination with Billboard chart trivia, so it should not come as a shock to anyone whatsoever that today’s On This Date segment features a tidbit about Jan Hammer being at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with Miami Vice Theme.  

Dry, Technical Matter: As we gleefully note (along one other tasty morsel) this song represents Hammer’s only Hot 100 hit, making him one of 14 ultimate one-hit-wonders (OHW): acts whose only Hot 100 entry went to #1. 

Please, Shoot Me Now: And Hammer is an almost interesting field test for what does and what does not constitute an OHW because he had a follow-up hit on Billboard’s adult contemporary chart, but entries on other charts do not affect Hot 100 OHW status because who cares about the adult contemporary chart? It rates songs your aunt in Reno listens to. 

Yeah, This Is Interesting: There are other rather dull factors, too. For example, a #1 song under your own name plus a Hot 100 appearance where you get co-billing will keep you off, too (Vangelis, Jon & Vangelis), though being part of a studio ensemble you are a while charting on your own (Hollywood Argyles, The Heights) will not.

Are You Getting A Tension Headache, Too?: Also, the same song charting in two different chart runs (Sheriff, When I’m With You, #61, 1983,#1 1989) will keep you off, as well. 

The Bottom Line: We know this fascinates you as much as it does us, maybe more, so count on us to keep you updated on this vital tidbit. And remember it is possible to earn your way off this list, too. Olivia Rodrigo was actually the 15th OHW this past year, but only for a couple of weeks until her follow-up song charted. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – At the hotel, Sparrow has a couple of walk-ins. Today’s Diary. 

The first was a guy who seemed pretty odd…Not turn him away, we’re sold out odd, but odd enuff so where you wouldn’t be completely shocked to read about him in the papers one day…

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 11 – With both unvictoried Arizona and UNLV winning, the race for the ESPNCup – symbolic of Bottom Ten excellence – gets even tighter.

Loss to new major division team???…Check…Multiple blowout losses???…Check…Loss to Duke???…Check…

Forget B-10 Team of Quarter Century honors, Jayhawks can make strong case for B-10 Team of Half-Century honors by claiming second B-10 title this year…

A Lutheran school, coaching staff fears player’s Lutheran-esque habit of saying “go in peace, serve the Lord” before every tackle taking away edge required in sport that involves hitting fellow human beings.

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Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1862- Major General Ambrose Burnside takes command of the Army of the Potomac in the American Civil War. Burnside replaced Maj. Gen. George B McClellan who had taken command a year earlier. Burnside served until the following January when President Abraham Lincoln accepted his resignation. The term sideburns derives from his distinctive facial hair. 

In 1985 – Garry Kasparov of the Soviet Union defeats countryman and defending champion Anatoly Karpov in the final match of the world chess championship in Moscow. Kasparov won the best-of-24 series 5-to-3 with 16 draws. The two had met in the finals the previous year with the match abandoned by the world governing body with Karpov leading 5-to-3 with 40 draws in a first-to-6-wins format. Kasparov would win the world title six times through 1995, the same number Karpov won through 1998. 

In 1985 – Jan Hammer is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with Miami Vice Theme. The song also peaked at #5 in Great Britain and at #10 on Billboard’s soul chart. Hammer had no other Hot 100 hits and he remains one of 14 ultimate one-hit wonders: an act whose only chart single goes to #1. It was the last instrumental #1 song on the Hot 100 until 2013 when Harlem Shake by Baauer, who is also an ultimate one-hit wonder, spent five weeks at #1. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

The church forgot the poverty of the Apostles in the needs and expenses of power.
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization, Vol. VI: The Reformation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Three NFL kickers have kicked field goals of greater than 60-yards twice: Matt Prater. Justin Tucker and Brett Maher. Maher is the only one to do it three times. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Which Union Civil War general’s penchant for womanizing led to his name becoming a euphemism for a prostitute? – Answer next time!  

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/November 8, 2021
By Gaylon Kent  – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

Leading Off will return. Promise. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow microwaves some popcorn for a guest. Today’s Diary. 

The only problem was I had no idea how long to nuke it (as we used to say in the Navy) for but the dude dismissed my ignorance, noting that reading directions was unnecessary, that three minutes would do it.

It did, if your goal was to create charcoal briquettes…Even before it was done there was some smoke in the back office – not to mention a strong smell – and you needed a gas mask after opening the microwave’s door…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1519 – The fall of the Aztecs begins when Spaniard Hernan Cortez is welcomed into the city of Tenochtitlan by its leader Montezuma, who chose to welcome him as an ambassador rather than wage war. Cortes had landed in Mexico in April and would later lay siege to the city, which also exposed the Aztecs to diseases from which they had no immunity. Cortes would later found Mexico City on the site. 

In 1970 – Tom Dempsey of the New Orleans Saints establishes a new NFL record for the longest field goal in a 19-17 win over the Detroit Lions. Dempsey’s kick came as time expired and broke the record of 56-yards established by Bert Rechichar of the Baltimore Colts in 1953. The mark was broken in 2013 by Matt Prater of the Denver Broncos (64 yards) and the record is now held by Justin Tucker of the Baltimore Ravens, who had a 66-yard field goal this past September 26. 

In 1969 – The Beatles are at #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the second of ten non-consecutive weeks with Abbey Road. It was the band’s 13th of 16 #1 albums in the US and their last recorded with all four members in the studio. The album went to #1 in many other countries, including Norway and Great Britain, was Billboard’s 4th-biggest album of 1970 and is at #130 on the current Billboard 200 chart. The famous album cover of the band walking across the street was taken with the photographer standing on a ladder while a constable held up traffic for a few minutes. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

…it is not possible to rebel against the fact of nature…There is nothing but the always-so.
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The NFL record for fewest points in a shutout victory is two, done five times, most recently in 1938 when the Chicago Bears defeated the Green Bay Packers 2-0. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who are the only NFL players to kick field goals of at least 60-yards multiple times? – Answer next time!  

Share Gaylon! Go!