The Daily Dose/Saturday, March 8, 2025
The Daily Dose/March 8, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
USA! USA!: A private spacecraft called Athena landed on the moon Thursday, the second civilian spacecraft landing on the moon this week. Athena touched down near the lunar south pole after its Feb 27 launch.
Fly In The Ointment: No one is entirely sure how the spacecraft is oriented. It could be, as designed, standing straight up, or it would be on its side.
Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury: We have a couple of questions. 1) Why is it taking so long to get to the moon nowadays? Apollo made it in three days.Now it’s taking a week. 2) Who the hell cares?
Dry, Technical Matter: For our money, continued trips the moon are pointless. We put humans on it over 50 years ago and we have never seen the purpose of going back. Been there, done that, to use a catchphrase. It’s akin to a mountain climber rejoicing over returning to the base camp of a mountain he has already summited. Or going back to a small mountain when there is still Everest to climb
Boy, You’re Grouchy Today: We’re not even all that thrilled with returning humans to the moon, not that anyone should think Artemis is going to land there anytime soon. It is already six years behind schedule and those who believe the 2027 lunar landing date will be met are high, legally in more and more states.
The Bottom Line: This nation could’ve had men on Mars forty years ago if we’d wanted to. But we didn’t want to. America stopped dreaming within a generation or two of TV becoming the focal point of American life, and our country and our planet are the lesser for it. A pond that gains no new water eventually dies out, and friends, America is dying out. We haven’t done anything great since Apollo and we elected a president whose self-named university was a boiler room and who believes the moon is part of Mars. We could land on the moon a thousand more times and it wouldn’t do us any good.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow does battle with a vending machine. Today’s Diary.
The first sack got stuck on its own and we forked over for another sack, a desperate – and futile – attempt to liberate the first one…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1979 – The CD – a joint development of Philips and Sony – is demonstrated publicly for the first time in the Netherlands. The first CDs were released in Japan in 1982 and by 1991 were outselling LPs and cassettes, and by 2001 accounted for over 90% of all music sales. The first act to sell a million CDs was Dire Straits in 1985, and the first Beatles CDs were released in 1987. A CD is 1.2 millimeters thick and 4.7 inches in diameter.
In 1900 – The National League decides to contract from twelve teams to eight teams for the coming season. Baltimore, Cleveland, and Washington would return to the major leagues in 1901 as part of the American League, while Louisville returned to the minor leagues. The National League had been at twelve teams since the 1891 season and remain at eight teams until the 1961 season.
In 1969 – Sly & the Family Stone is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the fourth and final consecutive week with Everyday People. It was the second of nine Top 40 hits for the group, their second of five Top 10 songs, and their first of three #1s. The song also peaked at #36 in Great Britain, had earlier spent two weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 5th-biggest song of the year.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
This species could have been so great, and now everybody just wants a new Salad Shooter or sneakers with lights in them. This is what we’ve settled for.
George Carlin
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
Ezzard Charles had a career professional boxing record of 95-25-1.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What was the last major league game played by a Louisville team? – Answer next time!
The Daily Dose/Friday, March 7, 2025
The Daily Dose/March 7, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALLGAME: The headline caught our, but regular readers of this crap know this sort of headline always does:
MLB’s unbreakable records: Will anyone touch Joe DiMaggio’s hitting streak? Barry Bonds’ home run total?
Here We Go: Regular readers of this crap know the big league record book is one of our all-time favorite reads, so we dove right in. The writer had about two-dozen marks on his list, though some didn’t belong on the list simply because the game was played differently in the 19th century. .
Dry, Technical Matter: For example, teams had fewer pitchers, and they threw every other game or so, finishing what they started. So, among other records, Cy Young’s 749 complete games and Old Hoss Radbourn’s 60 wins in 1884 are exempt from consideration.
Take Me Out To The Dry, Technical Matter: Our own theory is that if someone did something once, someone can do it again. For example, some like to herald Cal Ripken Jr’s record of 2,632 consecutive games played as being unbreakable, but we don’t think so. We don’t think it will be broken, but it could be. Same with Barry Bonds’ 762 career home runs and Ty Cobb’s career .366 batting average: we wouldn’t make a futures bet on them being broken – and you shouldn’t either – but we don’t think they’re unbreakable.
Write This Down: For our money, there are only two unbreakable baseball records: Ted Williams’ career on-base percentage of .482 and Johnny Vander Meer’s consecutive no-hitters. A .482 on-base percentage means you are getting on base 96 times out of a hundred plate appearances. Someone might match Vander Meer’s accomplishment, but no one will ever pitch three consecutive 9-inning no-hitters.
The Bottom Line: We can add these two marks to the two other individual sports marks we think will last forever: Wilt Chamberlain’s 55 rebounds in an NBA game and the 70-68 fifth set John Isner and Nicholas Mahut played at Wimbledon in 2010. Fifty-five rebounds is a lot; it’s a rebound every minute plus rustling up seven more. Tiebreakers are now used for all sets in all professional tennis tournaments now, so the Isner/Mahut record is safe, but even if there weren’t tiebreakers for final sets in tennis majors, that record would be safe forever.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow meets the new guy. Today’s Diary.
Afterward, he opens the door and we say “Who the hell are you???” a pretty funny question under the circumstances…
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1965 – Several hundred civil rights marchers are attached by Alabama state and county authorities at a bridge crossing the Alabama River at Selma, Alabama. The marchers had started in Selma and were marching on US Hghway 80 when they encountered the authorities, who beat them with nightsticks, while others fired tear gas and charged the group on horseback. There were no deaths, but 17 marchers were hospitalized, while 50 more were treated for lesser injuries. History refers to the event as Bloody Sunday.
In 1951 – Ezzard Charles retains the world heavyweight boxing title with a 15-round unanimous decision over Jersey Joe Walcott at the Olympia in Detroit. It was the second of four meetings between the two fighters, all title bouts: In 1949 Charles won a unanimous decision for the vacant title, and Walcott would beat Charles for the title in July and would retain it in June 1952.
In 1981 – Yarbrough & Peoples is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the second of five consecutive weeks with Don’t Stop the Music. It was the first of five Top 10 soul hits for the duo and their first of two #1s. The song also went Top 10 pop in Canada and Great Britain and peaked at #19 on the Hot 100. Cavin Yarbrough and Alisa Peoples had met while taking piano lessons as kids in Dallas and married in 1987.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
Absence diminishes commonplace passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and kindles fire.
Duc De La Rouchefoucauld
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
Billboard’s #1 song of 1993 was I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston, which spent a then-record 14 weeks at #1 in 1992 and 1993.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What was Ezzard Charles’ career record? – Answer next time!
The Daily Dose/Thursday, March 6, 2025
The Daily Dose/March 6, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
HERE WE GO AGAIN: President Trump addressed Congress Tuesday night, and it was the same nonsense we’ve put up with since he announced for the GOP nomination in 2015: self-serving, gnorant, witless blather riddled with lies and inaccuracies. It is all Trump is capable of, like is blather of taking over Greenland.
Fly In The Ointment: And everyone knows it, too. You know it, I know it, your aunt in Duluth knows it, but nobody has ever been able to tell Trump “no, enough, you’re wrong, this is not the way things are”. He is a bully and most people are afraid of bullies.
USA! USA!: We all deserve blame for this. Instead of calling a spade a spade and telling Trump not to bother us, the American public – seven decades into TV and fast food being at the center of American life – is as witless as he is. We embraced him and so did the media.
#Oopsies: Let’s be honest, a media paced by Walter Cronkite, Woodward and Bernstein, and any of a dozen other journalists of the era would’ve dismissed Trump before the weekend. Today, the media’s primary job is to tell their target audience what they want to hear and not report substantive issues that might go against their grain. Trump meant ratings and clicks, so instead of dismissing a man of zero intellectual substance who had no business running for president, he was ushered into the primaries, the nomination, and the White House.
The Bottom Line: The only question is how much damage he can do in four years. Our guess is the damage will be mitigated because Trump’s utter lack of a big picture vision for both himself and his country will mean a lack of tangible results: he lives and governs off the top of his head, doing whatever he feels will garner him the most attention. But who knows? We elected a dunce and we are going to have to live with the results.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow oversleeps. Today’s Diary.
…we had no time to workout at all, unless all we wanted to do was do one medicine ball twist and walk around the basketball court once before heading home.
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 456 – Forty-two Byzantine officials who had been kidnapped seven years earlier are executed by Islamic leaders in Samara, now in central Iraq. The officials were taken hostage following the sack of Amorium in western Turkey and the Islamic caliphate had hoped to get a ransom for the hostages, but with no hope of that, they were executed after refusing to convert.
In 1919 – The Montreal Canadiens win the NHL championship, defeating the Ottawa Senators 4-2 to win the best-of-7 series in five games. It was the first of 24 NHL titles for the Canadiens and the only one that did not involve winning the Stanley Cup. The Canadiens played the Seattle Metropolitans of the Pacific Coast Hockey Association for the Stanley Cup, but the series was canceled after five games due to the Spanish flu epidemic.
In 1993 – Peabo Bryson and Regina Bell are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with A Whole New World. The song also peaked at #8 in Great Britain, at #21 on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 18th-biggest song of the year. The song was played over the closing credits of the movie Aladdin and won the Grammy Award for Best Pop Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group. Another version in the film by Brad Kane and Lea Solanga won the Academy Award for Best Original Song. It remains the only #1 song for both Bryson and Belle.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
I can be silenced, not by enemies, not by authority – but by my own comfortable indifference.
Morris West
The Clowns of God
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
Kobe Bryant scored the most points in an NBA game by someone other than Wilt Chamberlain, 80, in January 2006. He broke David Thompson’s record of 73, established in April 1978.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What was Billboard’s #1 song of 1993? – Answer next time!
The Daily Dose/Monday, March 3, 2023
Friends,
We are taking a couple of days of. Sparrow sends greetings, and looks forward to boring you again before the week is out.
Thank you for reading,
The Daily Dose/Sunday, March 2, 2025
The Daily Dose/March 2, 2025
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things.
1. Donald Trump – Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “strongly suspect” Trump’s next geographical edict will change name of country to People’s Republic of Amerika.
2. Volodymyr Zelenskyy – Ukrainian president berated in Oval Office by President Trump for forcing Russia to invade it three (3) years ago, tho Zelenskyy’s motive remains unclear …Zelenskyy earns further US ire by refusing to drop second “y” from end of last name.
3. People’s Republic of Amerika – The new 3-hole staple, replacing USA! USA! as we slide into a Trump/Musk dictatorship…Amerika completely off its rocker now, siding with Russians, alienating old allies, and smacking around a good man trying to save his country.
4. 2026 Midterm Elections – Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” elections will go off as scheduled, but not entirely sure and, be honest, you probably aren’t entirely sure either, as Amerika might be a nice little dictatorship by then.
5. Donald Trump Fact Check – Click here for Trump’s lies and inaccuracies from this week’s Cabinet meeting…Courtesy of CNN.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has the latest morning coffee service news from the hotel. Today’s Diary.
…not only new brands of French vanilla and hazelnut creamers BUT – and hold on to your hats here – new brands of cups and lids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
———
Would you like 4Ever & Ever access to Gaylon’s crap?
Of course you would.
Click here. It’s only $24.99.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.
In 1972 – Pioneer 10 is launched by the United States at Cape Canaveral, Florida on a mission to fly by Jupiter. The spacecraft took seven months to make the trip and made its closest approach to Jupter (82,178 miles) on December 3. Radio occlusion data -297° F and -261° F. The spacecraft crossed Pluto’s orbit in 1983 and it’s last signal to Earth was received in January 2003 at a distance of 7.5 billion miles from Earth.
Editor’s Note: due to time constraints, the next two entries ran last year.
In 1962 – Wilt Chamberlain of the Philadelphia Warriors establishes a new NBA record for most points in a game in a 169-147 win over the New York Knicks in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Chamberlain had 100 points, breaking the record of 78 points he had established the previous December 8 and the record still stands. It was the third time Chamberlain had set the NBA’s single-game scoring record and the 316 combined points established a new NBA record for most points in a game, a mark now held by the Detroit Pistons and the Denver Nuggets (370, 12/13/83).
In 1974 – Bob Dylan with The Band is at #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the third of four consecutive weeks with Planet Waves. It was the eighth of 22 Top 10 albums for Dylan and his first of five #1 albums for and remains the only appearance at #1 on a Billboard chart for The Band. The album produced two chart singles, neither of which made the Top 40.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
He was not so unreasonable-usually- as to demand both freedom and the fruits of popular slavery.
Sinclair Lewis
Arrowsmith
Answer To The Last Trivia Questions
Knowledge is power.
Steve Yzerman of the Detroit Red Wings holds the NHL record for most assists by a player who spent his career with one team with 1,063.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
What is the most points scored in an NBA game by someone not named Wilt Chamberlain? – Answer next time!
The Diary of a Nobody/March 1
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Saturday, March 1
The big news is we walked out of the house without our uniform, shirts, and vest…We did remember our tacky red tie, but without the uniform shirts they did us some zero good…It’s tragic, too, because everything had been washed and was put over the backs of a kitchen chair expressly so they would not be forgotten…So we had to make due with our black, dryfit t-shirt…Fortunately, it was freshly washed, and we had our name tag, and we look pretty good with it tucked in, so it all worked out.