The Daily Dose/December 20, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
A countdown of something. 

Editor’s Note: this past Thursday our Trivia feature noted Wilt Chamberlain had 45 50-point games in the 1961-62 NBA season, which is still a record. In the mood for some end-of-the-year frivolity, Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters are “pretty sure” they are more or less pleased to present a listing of five records that are unlikely to ever be broken. They are listed in no particular order. 

1. Wilt Chamberlain, Most 50-point Games, Season: 45 – 45 games is 55% of an NBA season and the record is so untouchable the next highest total by a player not named Wilt (he had 30 in 1962-63) is ten (10), by Kobe Bryant in 2006-07. 

2. John Isner/Nicholas Mahut, 70-68 final set, Wimbledon, 1st Round, 2010 – This one is almost beyond comprehension, one of those times the Sports Gods looked down and said “Let’s have some fun” and the fifth set alone would qualify as the longest match in tennis history…Record can only be broken at French Open, as other majors have instituted tiebreakers in all matches. 

3. Wilt Chamberlain II, Most Rebounds, NBA Game, 55 –  Record so unapproachable the highest total by someone not named Chamberlain or Bill Russell is 40 (Jerry Lucas, Cincinnati, 2/29/64) and the highest total this century is 31 (Kevin Love, Minnesota, 11/12/10). 

4. Johnny VanderMeer, Most Consecutive No-hitters, 2 – We are not completely ruling out someone matching this feat, but even if pitchers routinely pitched complete games nowadays – which they don’t- no one will ever pitch three consecutive no-hitters.

5. Wayne Gretzky, Most Career Assists, 1,963 – Of The Great One’s many records unlikely to be topped, this is our favorite because it’s more assists than any other player has had points…Gretzky held 40 NHL regular-season records when he retired, itself a mark that is likely never to be broken.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  The bloody coppers visit Sparrow at the hotel. 

About midnight I hear some scurrying in the lobby and I head out and see two of our fine local constables wandering around, plainly looking for something…I ask what they need and they say they’re looking for room 202…I tell them to go thru both doors and make a left and take the stairs up and as they are heading there I ask if I may be of service, which is a polite way of asking what in the fuck is going on because while it is possible – hell, likely – that yours truly will be some zero value on this call, it would be nice to know what the deal is…They declined to tell me, tho that didn’t really matter because right then an ambulance and fire trucks started pulling into the driveway and you don’t have to be Joe Friday to deduce they were called by someone in 202. 

The Regular Guys/Chapter 22  – Lenny and Ann get married, and The Regular Guys embark on a national tour. 

About a third of the way through the hype surrounding the release of The Comedy Delivery System Lenny found himself sitting at the head table of a party at Picasso, one of the very best restaurants in town.

The party was to celebrate his wedding to his long-time girlfriend, Ann Shelton. The wedding had been a small, tasteful affair at the Big Elvis Wedding Chapel officiated by an Elvis impersonator the size of a small frigate. His best man Larry and another Elvis impersonator attended Lenny; two Caesars Palace showgirls attended the bride. 

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On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 2019 – The United States Space Force is formed, the first new branch of the US armed forces since the founding of the Air Force in 1947. The purpose of the Space Force is to provide operational freedom in space for the US as well as providing assorted space operations. It is part of the Department of the Air Force and its personnel are known as guardians, much like naval personnel are known as sailors. 

In 1946 – Sugar Ray Robinson wins the vacant world welterweight boxing title, defeating Tommy Bell in a 15-round unanimous decision in Cleveland. It was the first world title for Robinson, who would later win the world middleweight title five times. It was the 16th and final fight of 1946 for Robinson, a very high total by today’s standards. Robinson had a 25-year professional career and retired in 1965 with a career mark of 173-19-6. 

Today – Mariah Carey is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first week with All I Want For Christmas Is You. It’s the second time the song has gone to #1, having spent four weeks at the top last year and early this year, making Carey the second act in Hot 100 history to have the same song go to #1 in separate chart runs. (Chubby Checker, The Twist, 1960, 1962, is the other). First released in 1995, the song has also gone to #1 in 25 other countries over the years, including Great Britain, Slovakia and Norway, and is Billboard’s 67th biggest song of 2020, a period which due to how Billboard reckons its chart year, includes its December 2019 chart run. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Death is unavoidable, but let it not be from loss of will but because your time is over.
Deng Ming-Dao
365 Tao

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.

Baby Love, You Keep Me Hanging On and Someday We’ll Be Together are the songs by the Supremes that spent the most weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart: four weeks. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

Who was the first person to defeat Sugar Ray Robinson in a professional bout? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/December 19, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off is enjoying some holiday cheer and will return after the first of the year. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  As part of the New Routine, Sparrow works out in town. Today’s Diary.  

It took a bit to get acclimated, of course, but once everything was sorted out it was easy to get the usual workout in…The only difference was the cardio room is not immediately adjacent to the weights so the new plan of doing spin bike reps between sets was out…That’s OK, tho…They have my fave stationary bike, an updated one of the type I’ve been using off and on for years, and it was fun to dive back in on it…Of course, I have squat for cardio strength now, so I started with the usual interval at a level a refugee wouldn’t find particularly challenging.

The Regular Guys/Chapter 21  – Larry produces the first Regular Guy CD. 

“What are you, an idiot?” Ray Evans asked Larry incredulously while they had lunch. “You should’ve known a Regular Guy album would’ve sold big.” 

“It’s only sold 2,000 copies, Ray,” Larry pointed out. 

“That’s because that’s all you made, doe-doe head. You stars, I swear, you can be so dense sometimes.” 

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Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1606 – Three ships of the English Virginia Company – the Susan Constant, Discovery and Godspeed – leave England on a voyage to the New World. The ships would reach Chesapeake Bay in May where the colonists founded what would eventually become the state of Virginia. The three ships are commemorated on the reverse side of the Virginia state quarter. Some sources list the date of departure as December 20. 

In 1984 – Wayne Gretzky of the Edmonton Oilers establishes a new NHL record for the fewest games needed to reach 1,000 points in a 7-3 win over the Los Angeles Kings. Gretzky had two goals and four assists for six points, giving him 1,000 points in his 424th NHL game, breaking the record of 720 games established by Guy Lafleur of the Montreal Canadiens. The record still stands. 

In 1964 – The Supremes are at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two non-consecutive weeks with Come See About Me. It was the third of five consecutive #1 songs for the group and their third of twelve #1 songs overall. The song also peaked at #1 in Canada and Singapore, at #27 in Great Britain and at #3 on the Cashbox soul chart (Billboard was not publishing a soul chart at the time). The song was written by the highly successful songwriting team of Brian and Eddie Holland and Lamont Dozier.

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Dreams will come true if you let them.
Nelson DeMille
The Gold Coast

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.

The NFL returned goalposts to the end line in the 1974 season. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

What song by the Supremes spent the most weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/December 18, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off will return after the first of the year. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  The cat bothers Sparrow while he is trying to sleep. Today’s Diary. 

It was actually only three hours or so into the sleep session that she started in on the meowing…Then she hopped on the bed and settled in on my back and while she keeps quiet there, shortly after she jumps down to the floor and starts in again…Well, heck…I wasn’t ready to get up – there were still a couple-three more hours of sleep to be had – and I certainly wasn’t going to yield to her demands so I went tactical and shut the bedroom door…She doesn’t like this and while it doesn’t completely block out her whining (even with earplugs) it does cut it down so it doesn’t wake you up. 

The Regular Guys/Chapter 20 – Lenny’s girlfriend Ann is promoted to Chief of Police. 

First Lady Rachel Rachmaninov introduced Chief of Police – Designate Ann Shelton and the mayor to the president of the United States. The mayor looked as if he were about to hemorrhage. Chief of Police – Designate Ann Shelton, accustomed to not showing what she was feeling, smiled as if she were intrigued. She looked accusingly at her friend Larry, who was beaming a smile you could drive a truck through. Ann was a fan of the president and had been angry with Lenny and Larry for visiting the then-vice president without her. 

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

On This Date
The long march to today.

In 1777 – Thanksgiving is celebrated in the United States for the first time, declared by the Continental Congress to commemorate the American’s October victory over the British in the Revolution’s Battle of Saratoga. Previously, the holiday had been celebrated at various times in the 13 original colonies and it was celebrated intermittently in the United States until it was declared a permanent federal holiday by President Lincoln in 1863.

In 1932 – The Chicago Bears defeat the Portsmouth Spartans 9-0 in the first NFL championship game and the first NFL game played indoors. Originally scheduled for Wrigley Field, the weather forced organizers to move the game to Chicago Stadium, then three years old and home to the NHL’s Chicago Black Hawks. The game remains one of the most significant in NFL history as rule modifications like moving the goalposts to the goal line, starting each play inside the hash marks and the introduction of a permanent league championship game, were adopted the following season.

 In 1965 – James Brown is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Rhythm & Blues Singles chart – for the third of six non-consecutive weeks with I Got You (I Feel Good). It was the 28th of 118 soul hits for Brown – a long-time soul chart record that is now good for fifth on the all-time soul chart list – and his third of 17 #1 soul songs.  The song also peaked at #3 on the Hot 100 and remains the biggest of Brown’s 44 Top 40 pop hits. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Action must be guided by both intellect and experience. We learn…but we must also test what we learn in the world. It is not enough to simply meditate.
Deng Ming-Dao
365 Tao

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar.

Miss You Much by Janet Jackson spent four weeks at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 during the calendar year 1989, the most of any song. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

When did the NFL return goalposts to the end line? – Answer next time!

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