The Daily Dose/Saturday, July 29, 2023

The Daily Dose/July 29, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

HEY BATTER, BATTER…SWING: The Los Angeles Angeles decided this week to keep Shohei Ohtani, the best player on the planet, for the rest of the season, in the hope that the Angels will make the playoffs. They really had no choice in the matter. To have traded him would not have been keeping faith with their fans. 

Stop Us If You’ve Heard This Before: Almost interesting is the fact we would’ve been saying the Angels had no choice had they decided to trade him. Sure, the Angels are in the thick of the American League wild-card race, and they’re not completely out of the American League West title hunt, either, but let’s be honest, they’re the Angels for crying out loud. They haven’t been in the playoffs since being swept by Kansas City in 2014, so in the six seasons Otani and the second-best player in the world, Mike Trout, have played together, they’ve appeared in zero (0) playoff games and they probably aren’t going to start now. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Sure, maybe the Angels catch fire, make the playoffs, and win the World Series. Probably they don’t, though, and probably Ohtani goes somewhere else at the end of the season, leaving them nothing except a compensatory draft pick. 

The Bottom Line: This was a tough call. On the one hand, the only pennant you can win is this year’s, and if you trade Ohtahni you’re telling your fans the towel has been thrown in on 2023. Still, though, the Angels could’ve traded Ohtani for enough prospects to give their fans something to look forward to in the next few years…Either way, they had no choice.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow encounters some first-world problems. Today’s Diary. 

Then we go out to the hot tub and the goddamned jets aren’t turned on…Again…For the second week in a row…Now, to the lifeguard’s credit he got right on it but still, ol’ Sparrow was obliged to sit in non-bubbling water for at least 60 seconds…

———

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———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1976 – David Berkowitz, known to History as the Son of Sam killer, shoots his first victims, two young women, one of whom dies. The shootings occurr in the Bronx and were the first of eight shootings attributed to Berkowitz. Berkowitz was arrested in August 1977, after a follow-up investigation for a parking ticket he had been issued. Berkowitz pled guilty and remains incarcerated in southern New York, regularly declining to apply for parole. 

In 1948 – The London Summer Olympics open at Wembley Stadium. They were the first Summer Olympics since 1936 due to World War II and they are known as the Austerity Games because no new facilities were built. Athletes from 59 nations participated, with the US winning the most gold (38) and overall (84) medals. It was the second of three Summer Games held in London (1908, 2012), a club that will later be joined by Paris and Los Angeles. 

In 1967 – The Doors are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the first of three consecutive weeks with Light My Fire. It was the first of seven Top 40 hits for the group and their first of two #1s. The song also went to #1 in Ireland (1991), peaked at #49 in Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 6th-biggest song of the year. In 1968 a version by Jose Feliciano went to #3 on the Hot 100 and in 1979 a version by Amii Stewart peaked at #69. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

We are always getting ready to live, but never living.
Ralph Waldo Emerson 

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Of the ten teams in the NFL in 1933, the New York Giants, Philadelphia Eagles, Pittsburgh Pirates/Steelers, Green Bay Packers, and the Chicago Bears are still in the same city. The Boston Redskins are now the Washington Commanders, the Portsmouth Spartans are the Detroit Lions, the Chicago Cardinals are the Arizona Cardinals, and the Brooklyn Dodgers and Cincinnati Reds folded. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was Billboard’s #1 song of 1967? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/July 28

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The Daily Dose/Friday, July 28, 2023

The Daily Dose/July 28, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off will return. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow’s at his car about to head to the gym when he hears a raised voice nearby. Today’s Diary. 

Call us ‘fraidy cats if you want, but our own working hypothesis is raised voices at 0130 must be treated with caution and respect…

———

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———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1854 – The US Navy commissions its last all-sail warship, the USS Constellation, in Norfolk, Virginia.  The ship’s first period of service was short, until 1871, and spent mainly in the Mediterranean and Africa. The ship was decommissioned and recommissioned several times over the years, was decommissioned for good in 1955, and is now a museum ship in Baltimore. She was the second of five ships with the name with the latest, a frigate, expected to begin service in 2025. 

In 1933 – The NFL announces that it will split into two five-team divisions for the coming season, with New York, Brooklyn, Boston, Philadelphia, and Pittsburgh in the Eastern Division and the Chicago Bears, Portsmouth (Ohio), Green Bay, Cincinnati, and Chicago Cardinals in the Western Division. The change was spurred, in part, by the success of the 1932 playoff game to break a season-ending tie for first place. The Bears would beat the New York Giants 23-21 in the first NFL Championship Game in December and today the NFL has eight divisions in two conferences. 

In 1979 – Donna Summer is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third of five consecutive weeks with Bad Girls. It was the sixth of 14 Top 10 hits for Summer and her third of four #1s. The song also went to #1 in Canada, peaked at #14 in Great Britain, went to #1 on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 2nd-biggest song of the year. The song was from the album of the same name, which was in its fifth of six non-consecutive weeks at #1 on Billboard’s album chart.

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Lost in the cacophony of Oprah and O.J. are those classical values that once made a Saturday afternoon track meet so appealing. Of running for the love of competition, of throwing a javelin for applause and an olive wreath. Of sweating for hours on a lonesome track at dusk for the chance of maybe one day hearing the anthem. Of honor and glory and the spirit of victory, not the spoils.
Mark Zeigler
The San Diego Union-Tribune
6.20.95

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The first country the US established diplomatic relations with was France, in 1778, and the most recent was South Sudan in 2011. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Of the ten teams in the NFL in 1933, how many are still in the league in the same city? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/July 27

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The Daily Dose/Thursday, July 27, 2023

The Daily Dose/July 27, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

HERE WE GO AGAIN: Yesterday here we talked about the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST) and its prospect of finding evidence of other life in the universe. It’s advanced enough so this is hardly out of the question and got us thinking about, among other things, how such discovery might happen and some of the other questions that will remain unanswered. 

Thank You, Carl Sagan: We strongly suspect the JWST won’t catch an alien waving at it from a flying saucer. In fact, it may not discover an actual life form at all, merely evidence of one. For example, the JWST is already detecting water vapor in a star system’s inner disk less than 100 million miles away from a sun and when you consider Earth is 93 million miles away from the sun, well, you do start to wonder. 

Dry, Technical, Matter: Now, we’re not Mr Science, but our thinking is the discovery would be something along these lines. Or maybe JWST does take pictures of flying objects around a planet. Or maybe it finds nothing at all. 

Well, That Helped: Regardless, other questions will remain. The telescope’s mission is to take pictures of stars and other matter close to the formation of the universe, and it probably is not capable of telling if the universe ever stops and even if it did, it would probably be unable to tell us what is on the other side. And it is unlikely to shed any light on what there was before creation/the big bang. 

Oh Yeah: And we probably shouldn’t hold our breath waiting for snapshots of entrances to heaven and hell. Whether this is because they don’t exist or they are not to be found can be discussed later. 

The Bottom Line: Our latest search for knowledge – time immemorial’s irresistible revolution – may or may not provide the ultimate insights. It probably won’t, honestly, but the prospect that it might is enough to keep us exploring. And it’s fun to ponder. Or at least we think it is, which may be why we don’t get invited to many parties. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow tells a guest no one has turned in a phone. Today’s Diary. 

He seemed surprised and said, well, someone will probably be by in the next “few minutes” to turn it in, saying this in a manner that indicated the entire hotel should immediately go on full tactical alert…No one had turned the phone in by the time I left…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1789 – The first federal agency under the new US Constitution is formed when President George Washington signs legislation forming the Department of Foreign Affairs. The department would be renamed the State Department in September, with John Jay serving as interim secretary until Thomas Jefferson got around to taking office the following March. Today the US has diplomatic relations with 171 countries and roughly 75,000 employees. 

In 1919 – Joe Wilhoit of the Wichita Jobbers of the Class-A Western League establishes a new professional baseball record for the longest hitting streak in a game in a 14- 1 win over the Tulsa Oilers. It was the 46th consecutive game with a hit for Wilhoit, breaking the record of 45 established by Jack Ness of the Oakland Oaks of the Pacific Coast League in 1915 and Wilhoit would eventually hit in 69 consecutive games, a record that still stands. Some sources say this was the 50th consecutive game with a hit for Wilhoit, however, three Wichita newspapers all have it as his 46th.

In 1940 – Billboard magazine publishes its first pop music chart with Tommy Dorsey and his Orchestra with Frank Sinatra and the Pied Pipers at #1 on the National Best Selling Retail Records chart for the first of twelve consecutive weeks with I’ll Never Smile Again. The survey had ten spots, with Mitch Ayers and His Fashions In Music at #10 with Make-Believe Island, Ayers only appearance on a Billboard pop music chart.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Not daring to put myself ahead of everybody
I can take the time to perfect my abilities.
Lao Tzu
The Tao Te Ching #67

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Clint Eastwood’s only Hot 100 song was Make My Day, with T.G. Sheppard, which peaked at #62 in March 1984.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was the first and the most recent country the US established diplomatic relations with? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/July 26

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The Daily Dose/Wednesday, July 26, 2023

The Daily Dose/July 26, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

A LONG TIME AGO, IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR, AWAY: We don’t like to throw the words “awesome” or “amazing” out there too often because – much like the exclamation point – they are overused to the point of meaninglessness nowadays. But they’re appropriate to describe the images coming back from the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST). 

Dry, Technical, Matter: The JWST was launched in 2021 and stands post in solar orbit 930,000 miles from Earth, its namesake the administrator of NASA in the 1960s. Its big-picture mission is to search for light from the earliest days of the universe and like all good explorers the JWST is finding what’s there. 

Uh-Oh: There may well come a time when it will answer one of the two or three questions that matter: is there someone else out there? An affirmative answer will then bring up another fundamental question: what now? 

Holy Living Crap: Well, us humans being human, after putting our soiled pants in the wash, we’ll probably jump to conclusions and provide knee-jerk reactions. It will be the landmark day in human history, the line of demarcation separating everything before from everything that follows and we probably won’t take it very well. 

More From The Holy Living Crap Desk: We will never prove there isn’t anyone else out there, but if we do manage to prove there is, whoa Nelly. What if they need air and water, too, and are like us? What if their life system is something we didn’t even fathom – and what if they’re as in awe of us as we are of them?

The Bottom Line: Hell, we don’t know, either. But it is entirely possible the JWST will allow/force us to stop wondering about it and start considering it, or even act on it. It’s something we should not be afraid of. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – At the gym, Sparrows finds someone using his usual tricep machine. Today’s Diary. 

It would’ve been appropriate to’ve gone up and asked him how much longer he was going to be using the machine, but kids being kids today, he might have started weeping so we didn’t…

———

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It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 2005 – Mumbai, India and the surrounding area receive over 39 inches of rain in 24 hours, killing 1,094 people, causing widespread flooding, disrupting air, rail, and highway transportation, and halting commercial activity for several days. The all-time record for rain in a 24-hour period is 71.8 inches at Reunion Island, a French possession east of Madagascar, in 1966.

In 1879 – Harry McCormick of the Syracuse Stars becomes the first major league pitcher to hit a home run in a 1-0, complete-game victory in a win over the Boston Red Caps. The feat has been accomplished several times since, most recently by Noah Syndergaard in 2019. It was the only home run of McCormick’s career and the Stars, in their only National League season, folded on September 10.  

In 1980 – Bar Room Buddies by Merle Haggard and Clint Eastwood is at #1 on Billbord’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the only week. It was the 25th of 38 #1 country hits for Haggard, was the first of three country hits for Eastwood, and remains his only #1. The song was from the soundtrack to the movie Bronco Billy, also went #1 country in Canada, and was Billboard’s 6th-biggest country song of the year. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
Arthur C Clarke (197-2008)
English writer

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Mark Lindsay was the lead singer of Paul Revere & the Raiders. His song Arizona peaked at #10 in 1970.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

What was Clint Eastwood’s only Hot 100 hit? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/July 25

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The Daily Dose/Tuesday, July 25, 2023

The Daily Dose/July 25, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off remains in time-out.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow is fairly busy at the VSO. Today’s Diary. 

(By the by, in deference to the acoustics in the new building, and in the interests of privacy, we closed the door for Rick’s appointment, with Paula later saying she could only hear what was said if she really “worked at it and paid attention”.)

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 315 – The Arch of Constantine opens in Rome. Construction had started in 312, following Constantine’s victory in the Battle of Milvian Bridge and Constantine’s Arch still stands, next to the Colosseum, though it is fenced off now. The arch has inspired several other arches over the centuries, including the Brandenberg Gate in Potsdam, The Arc de Triomphe in Paris, and Union Station in Washington, D.C. Constantine served as Roman emperor from 306-337.

In 2021 – The US’s 25-game winning streak in men’s Olympic basketball ends with an 83-76 loss to France at Tokyo Summer Olympics. It was the first loss for the Americans since a semifinal defeat to Argentina in the 2004 Athens Games, and the US would come back to defeat France in the gold medal game 87-82. The US has a 143-6 record in Olympic play and has won 16 gold medals. 

In 1971 – Paul Revere & the Raiders is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with Indian Reservation (The Lament of the Cherokee Reservation Indian). It was the fifth and final Top 10 hit for the group and remains their only #1 song. The song also peaked at #2 in Canada, was Billboard’s 6th-biggest song of the year, and the story that songwriter John D Loudermilk was rescued in a blizzard by Cherokee Indians and wrote the song as a tribute to them appears to be a tale spun by Loudermilk. A version by Don Fardon peaked at #20 in 1968. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

I grew fond of her company, and at this time being under no religious restraints, I attempted familiarities (another erratum), which she repulsed with proper resentment.
Benjamin Franklin
Autobiography

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Olympic marathon record is 2 hours, 6 minutes, 32 seconds by Samuel Wanjiru of Kenya, at the 2008 Beijing Games. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who was the lead singer of Paul Revere & the Raiders and what Top 10 song did he later have as a solo act? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/July 24

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