Notes from around the Human Experience…

AMERICA..LAND OF THE FREE, HOME OF TRUMP: One lesson we all should have learned by now is that nothing of substance is going to get done during the Trump Administration. The latest imbroglio, the debate over the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program, is the latest example.

There really isn’t a reason for wanting to change or eliminate this program except for the standard Trump reasons of being petty and vindictive, for not having an initiative of his own, for merely wanting to undo what someone else has done. Trump has established he has nothing original and workable to offer his country, that he seldom thinks beyond his next tweet or of anything other than how best to draw attention to himself. 

Nothing is going to happen here, either, because outside of saying “do something” Trump is providing his usual zero guidance. He has parlayed a mandate from white America, a GOP controlled Congress and his own ineptitude into a complete inability to govern. We used to say America will spend the entire Trump years merely marking time but we’re not even going to do that. This country is so fractured, so devoid of leadership and so divisive right now that we are sinking farther and farther into an abyss we might not be able to crawl out of. Marking time until you and me – we the people – decide we deserve better would be progress.

Dry, Technical Matter: Not that passing the matter of on Congress is wrong. It’s not because this is something that is Congress’ province to deal with. As we should all remember from civics class, Congress passes laws and the president executes those laws and DACA is something Congress should have implemented in the first place, instead of President Obama instituting it via executive order in 2012.

Gaylon For Congress…Vote Early, Vote Often: DACA is merely a symptom of our bigger immigration problem, one that really has no solution. Ideally, conditions in other countries are good enough that others neither want nor need to move here to build a good life, but it is not reasonable to expect that to happen. 

So instead of looking at this as a problem, let’s look at it as an opportunity. In our 2014 book The Liberty Handbook, we discuss a program that allows those who entered illegally to remain here. We called it the work card program and would allow those who want to do so to obtain legal residency here, even if their initial entry violated current federal law.  

Fly In The Ointment: They would not be entitled to become citizens, however. That privilege is reserved for those who play by the rules. So they would be denied the right to vote and a passport and a few other things.

Back On Message: But America should have a place for those who want to a better life. It’s America’s stock in trade, what we do, what made us great because America was built on the back of immigrants. Anybody who doesn’t realize either forgot the lessons they learned in school or never learned them in the first place.

ON THIS DATE! ON THIS DATE! The Pilgrims, a group of 100 or seeking religious freedom, leave Plymouth, England on this date in 1620. They would arrive off the coast of Massachusetts on November 9 and after some fussing around about where to land, ultimately anchored off what is now Provincetown on the 12th.

From The Ballyard: The Chicago Cubs – then known as the White Stockings – set a major league record by scoring 18 runs in the bottom of the seventh inning, part of a 26-6 win over the Detroit Wolverines. The record still stands.

Some record setting individual performances accented the festivities. Ned Williamson, Tom Burns and Fred Pfeffer became the first players to have three hits in an inning and Williamson and Burns were the first to score three runs in an inning. Both records have been tied, but otherwise still stand.

Oh Yeah: Burns had two doubles and a home run, establishing records for most extra base hits and total bases in an inning that still stand. 

FunFact: The Detroit Wolverines would leave the National League after the 1888 season.

The Post Game Show Is Brought To You By Old Style Beer: Elsewhere in the National League, Providence defeated Boston 6-1 and Buffalo defeated Cleveland 7-1. Chicago remains in first place a game up on Providence, Cleveland and Boston. Boston, however, would win 14 of their last 15 games to win the pennant by four games over Chicago.

Quotebook: It is natural for man to indulge in the illusion of hope. We are apt to shut our eyes against a painful truth… – Patrick Henry, “Give me liberty or give me death” speech to Virginia Legislature, 3/23/1775

Answer To The Last Trivia Question: The Albany Congress of 1754 and the Stamp Act Congress of 1765 were the first two legislative gatherings of the American colonies.

Today’s Stumper:  What team replaced the Detroit Wolverines in the National League for the 1889 season? – Answer next time!

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GIVE NUCLEAR WAR A CHANCE: Fresh off another successful nuclear test, North Korea is again testing, so to speak, the world’s patience. The sabers continue to rattle. The threat, as comical as it is tragic, continues to grow.

It’s tragic because until somebody uses the common sense they were born with the chance of nuclear weapons being used again grows by the day. It’s comical because this tit-for-tat is childish and unnecessary.

Dry, Technical Matter: What are we expecting to happen here? Are we expecting threats and sanctions to persuade North Korea to back down? That is folly. North Korea is a second-rate military dictatorship led by a leader eager to show the world how big his cock is.

Don’t expect the US to back down, either. President Donald Trump – no stranger to showing the world whose is bigger – has one purpose in life: drawing attention to himself and he will mine this for every possible drop of attention it can generate for him, eagerly cheered on by the warmongers in the Defense Department.

Gaylon For Congress…Vote Early, Vote Often: We said this ad nauseum on the campaign trail:

We are not going to have a peaceful world without a peaceful America…

You can’t really argue with this, either. Well, you can, but not successfully.

Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury: Has American interference anywhere at any time produced peace? Of course it hasn’t. America has been at war continuously for almost three decades and the only dividend we have to show for it is more war, more death, more destruction. In no place and at no time has American intervention produced peace.

Her Lips Moved…She’s Lying: The United States Ambassador to the United Nations Nikki Haley told this to the UN Security Council:  

Enough is enough. War is never something the United States wants…

LOL: We checked. Haley said this with a straight face. She was just funning the UN, of course, because another war is always something the United States is down for.

We are on our way to getting it. The United States is to blame for all of this. You stir a hornet’s nest you are going to get stung. You leave it alone, you won’t. We are pestering and instigating North Korea, a nation more than willing to be pestered and instigated, and they are responding exactly as you would expect.

OH, BLOODY HELL: After four days, the Great Fire of London ends on this date in 1666.History estimates that the homes of 70,000 of London’s 80,000 residents are destroyed.

Also destroyed was Old St Paul’s Cathedral. The fourth church on that spot, William the Conqueror had started construction in 1087 following yet another fire. It was finished in 1314. Another St Paul’s Cathedral currently stands on the site.

Shave And A Haircut, Two Bits: Russian Tsar Peter the Great, just back from an 18-month tour of Europe – a tour History refers to as the Great Embassy – orders all citizens to shave their beards on this date in 1698. It was an effort to modernize what Peter believed was a backward country. The tax ranged from a couple of kopeks for peasants to 100 rubles for the nobles. Those that paid the tax had to wear a medallion that had a beard engraved on it.

Peter, himself clean shaven, started right in, removing the beards of his court at a reception immediately after his return.

Dry, Technical Matter: A couple of years later Peter would declare the Julian calendar in effect, changing the year from 7207 to 1700.  Previously, the Russians had reckoned the year from what they perceived to be the creation of the world.

USA! USA!: The Continental Congress of the United Colonies convenes for the first time, at Carpenter’s Hall in Philadelphia, on this date in 1774. They would adjourn in October and the Second Continental Congress would convene the following May.

Congress has always been good about keeping records, and regular readers of this crap know we quote their journals whenever we can. For their first session, they recorded the names of the delegates, as well as their commissions from their respective colonies.

The More Things Change…: Congress being Congress, they attempted to form a committee, however – again, Congress being Congress – this was put off until tomorrow.

Trial Of The Century: One of Hollywood’s first great scandals begins on this date in 1921 when actress Virginia Rappe falls ill at the St Francis Hotel in San Francisco at a party hosted by actor Fatty Arbuckle. She dies four days later.

Arbuckle was one of Hollywood’s biggest stars and the ensuing scandal may well have put OJ Simpson to shame. Arbuckle would stand trial three times in Rappe’s death. The first two trials resulted in hung juries and the third jury acquitted Arbuckle.

Nowadays a scandal like that might get you a three picture deal, or the White House, but Arbuckle had trouble finding work after his acquittal, his wife left him and he would die at age 46 in 1933.

Quotebook: …Malcolm felt his heart pound with hope because he knew that intuition and instinct had once again performed their customary miracle. – William McGivern,  Choice of Assassins

Answer To The Last Trivia Question: Benjamin Franklin, John Jay, Henry Laurens and John Adams negotiated the Treaty of Paris with the British.

Today’s Stumper: The First Continental Congress was the third legislative gathering of the colonies. What were the first two? – Answer next time!

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NO TRUMP TODAY:  Honestly, we weren’t even looking for a column idea because President Trump has darn near produced a backlog of column fodder, but the headline caught our eye:

NCAA Head In Tokyo To Offer Advice On College Sports Body

This is rich. The head of the largest intercollegiate sport governing body – NCAA president Mark Emmert – went to Japan to offer advice on regulating college sports.

What advice is he going to offer, how best to be both pimp and john simultaneously? On how to prostitute teenage boys and girls while at the same time prostituting yourself to TV networks? Maybe Tokyo State can take notes on how to keep a child molester on staff and still, after the smoke clears, continue to reap the financial windfall that is major college sports.

ROTFLMAO: Emmert should get an agent and start booking dates at comedy clubs, telling reporters, evidently with a straight face:

We’d like to be a part of this because we value sports as a part of education.

His Lips Are Moving…He’s Lying: My ass you do, Mr Emmert. You are there solely on spec, on the prospect that maybe you can send some teams to play some games there and make even more money for your conferences and teams on the backs of your treasured student-athletes.

Maybe at the Division III level sports are part of the educational process. Athletes pay their own way there or, if they don’t, they fight for the same grants and scholarships that future engineers and band members fight for.

However to say major division intercollegiate sports are anything more than a way scrape every last possible dollar off the backs of your athletes is folly. The NCAA is a billion dollar business and the top two dozen athletic departments generate over $100 million. The athletes see none of that.

Dry, Technical Matter: Some are surprised to find out that America is one of the few countries that have organized intercollegiate sports. Canada does. So do the Philippines and Indonesia and Great Britain. That’s really it.

“Jolly Good. A Flare Out To Trevor In The Right Flat, Then…On Three.”: Britain, under the auspices of British University and College Sports (BUCS), plays American football, too. It’s reported that every year there are issues with field markings on American football “pitches”, problems such as incomplete goal and end lines or, if they do have them, lines that are faint or crooked.

We’ll Be In Town All Week…Please Tip Your Waitresses: The problems, however, do not appear to be as egregious as those in Canada, where groundskeepers consistently keep putting two 50-yard lines on their fields.

The Bottom Line: If Japanese colleges are desirous of learning how to maximize revenues while fully exploiting their kids then they should have their notebooks out because with Emmert there class is in session. They are learning from the very best.

ON THIS DATE! ON THIS DATE!: St. Marinus, whom History records as fleeing a woman who accused him of being her husband, builds a chapel at Mount Titano on this date in 301, regarded as the founding of the Republic of San Marino, an enclave in northeast Italy. With an area of 24 square miles and a population of 34,000 or so, San Marino is the fifth smallest country in terms of both population and size.

Scoreboard, Baby: The Mongols lose the Battle of Ain Jalut to the Mamluks on this date in 1260. Fought in what is now northern Israel, the battle was the first time the Mongols had an advance halted in combat. It would also mark the farthest expansion for the Mongols, who saw their empire split four ways by the end of the century, though assorted Khanates of the Mongol empire would last until the 1800’s.

USA! USA!  The American Revolution officially ends with the signing of the Treaty of Paris on this date in 1783.

Despite the fact the treaty specified the boundaries of the new country, America’s borders would remain a fiasco for years, and the British violated the terms that stated they would vacate their forts almost before the ink was dry on the treaty. In fact, the only provision of the treaty that remains in force is the first one, which acknowledges America’s sovereignty.

“It Was A Time Of Joyous Excitement Which Words Can But Tamely Describe.”: Frederick Douglass escapes from slavery on this date in 1838.  Dressed as a sailor and using a borrowed certificate showing he was a free black seaman, Douglass went from Baltimore to Philadelphia to New York in less than 24 hours and except for the time his certificate was inspected by a train conductor, the trip was very routine.

Yeah, This Is Interesting: Joaquin Benoit of the Texas Rangers records the longest save in major league history on this date in 2002, pitching the final seven innings of a 7-1 victory over the Baltimore Orioles. Benoit relieved Todd Van Poppel, who had pitched two innings after starter Aaron Myette was ejected in the first inning.

Quotebook: As I writhed under it, I would at times feel that learning to read had been a curse rather than a blessing. It had given me a view of my wretched condition, without the remedy. It opened my eye to the horrible pit, but no ladder upon which to get out. In moments of agony, I envied my fellow-slaves for their stupidity. – Frederick Douglass, Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, An American Slave

Answer To The Last Trivia Question: Through 2016, 2,429,979 boys have achieved the rank of Eagle Scout.

Today’s Stumper: Who negotiated the Treaty of Paris for the Americans? – Answer next time!

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MORE PRESIDENT TRUMP…WHAT A SURPRISE: Wow, President Donald Trump stirring the pot again! A shocker, we know. Today we are going to chat about his recent pardon of former Maricopa County, Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio. Like most everything else President Trump does, this was done seemingly off the top of his head, as Arpaio had not filed a request for a pardon, a process which generally takes several, and sometimes many, years.  

Arpaio, 85, was convicted of violating a federal court order to halt his treasured immigration roundups, where Latinos in Maricopa County were unfairly detained and arrested. He was held in contempt on three counts in May, 2016 and this past July was convicted of criminal contempt of court. He was scheduled to be sentenced on October 5, and he still might be as the judge in the case indicated she would prefer to hear oral arguments on the matter before tossing the conviction out.

An interesting conundrum, a legal challenge to a president’s pardoning power because Presidents can pardon whomever they want – except, we believe, themselves – for any federal crime. The United States Constitution is very clear on this matter, Article II, Section 2 stating, in part:

…he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons for Offences against the United States, except in Cases of Impeachment.

The challenges are stemming from the premise that a pardon cannot be issued if it would result in someone else’s Constitutional rights being violated and that Arpaio’s pardon prevents the federal judiciary’s effort to enforce the Constitution.

Thank You, Oliver Wendell Holmes: Maybe, maybe not. People duller than us will hash this out, though it seems to us the judge’s order remains in effect. All that’s changed is Arpaio is no longer guilty of violating it.

The Bottom Line: The only restrictions on a president’s ability to pardon are that the pardon be for federal offenses and not be in a case of impeachment. That’s it. President Trump was well within his rights in pardoning Arpaio.

Don’t Even Start: This doesn’t mean we agree with the pardon. If we were President Arpaio would not have been considered for a pardon. He was not entitled to one, in our opinion.

Dry, Technical Matter: Controversial pardons are nothing new in this country, though a complete detailing of every single one is, thankfully, beyond the scope of this column. Some notable ones include the first President Bush pardoning Armand Hammer after Hammer donated $110,000 to the Republican National Committee, Bill Clinton pardoning his brother and Gerald Ford pardoning Richard Nixon even before Nixon was charged with anything.

ON THIS DATE! TWELVE DAYS LATER! Almost two centuries after it was first adopted by some other countries, Great Britain adopts the Gregorian calendar on this date in 1752. In Britain and its possessions, including the colonies that would become the United States, September 2, 1752 was followed by September 14, 1752.

We’re In From Some Dry, Technical Matter, Aren’t We?: The Gregorian calendar had been decreed in 1582 by Pope Gregory XIII and was immediately adopted by the Papal States. The Gregorian calendar modified the Julian calendar, which had been around since 45 BC and which replaced a Roman calendar.

The main problem with the Julian calendar was it added a leap day every four years no matter what and as a result the seasons were out of whack, which made celebrating Easter difficult. The Gregorian calendar changed, among other things, the number of leap years. Years that were divisible by 100 were no longer leap years unless they were also divisible by 400, then they were leap years.

Someone Please Insert A Boy Scout Phrase Here. We Don’t Know Any: Arthur Eldred becomes the first Eagle Scout on this date in 1912. Eldred, from Brooklyn, would later serve in the Navy in World War I  and would spend his working life in the agriculture, produce transportation and railroad industries. He remained active in scouting until his death in 1951 and was the father and grandfather of Eagle Scouts.

Missed It By That Much: Milt Pappas of the Chicago Cubs becomes the only pitcher to lose a perfect game on a walk to the 27th batter on this date in 1972. Pitching at Wrigley Field against the Padres, Pappas walked pinch-hitter Larry Stahl on a 3-2 pitch. The pitch was close enough that Pappas thought it should have been called a strike, and he would always remain bitter over the call by plate umpire Bruce Froemming. Pappas would retire the next batter for a no-hitter.

The Post Game Show Is Brought To You By Olde Style Beer: Pappas died last year and had an interesting career. His 20 home runs are 12th on the all-time list for home runs by a pitcher and he was the first pitcher to win 200 major league games without winning 20 games in a season.

Up, Up And Away To Red Square: West German Mathias Rust goes on trial in the Soviet Union on this date in 1987 following his arrest the previous May after he had landed his private plane in Moscow’s Red Square. Rust was convicted on assorted charges and sentenced to four years in a labor camp, though he ended up serving his sentence in a temporary detention facility in Moscow. He would be released as a goodwill gesture the following August.

Quotebook: Marriage, the last refuge of men unable to fend for themselves. – Garrison Keillor, Leaving Home

Answer To The Last Trivia Question: The first justice to hold the supreme court seat occupied by Thurgood Marshall was Joseph P Bailey in 1870. Bailey had been nominated by President Ulysses S Grant when the Judiciary Act of 1869 expanded the Supreme Court from eight seats to nine.

Today’s Stumper: How many Eagle Scouts have the Boy Scouts produced over the years? – Answer next time!

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