The Daily Dose/Monday, August 8, 2022

The Daily Dose/August 8, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience. 

3…2…1…BLASTOFF: South Korea recently launched their first lunar mission, an orbiter that includes a variety of scientific experiments that are, thankfully, beyond the scope of this modest feature, but part of the mission is to map out potential landing spots for an unmanned lunar lander by 2030. 

ROTFLMAO: This made us laugh because the US, at no charge to the South Koreans, has already pre-qualified the Sea of Tranquility, among other places, as suitable sights for landing a spacecraft. 

Dry, Technical Matter: The spacecraft is called the Korea Pathfinder Lunar Orbiter (KPLO). It lifted off on August 4 from Cape Canaveral aboard a Space X rocket and if successful the Koreans would become the seventh country to explore the moon, joining the US, China, Japan, India, the European Union, and the Soviet Union.

More Dry, Technical Matter: The South Koreans could also have taken lessons from the US in getting to the moon quickly. We took three days, while the KPLO is not scheduled to reach lunar orbit until December of all things. 

Dry, But Not Too Technical Matter: This intrigued us, so we looked into it and without getting too technical, the KPLO is solar powered and will use Mr Sun’s gravity to race out to a point about four times farther out than the moon, before reversing course using gravity to ease back toward earth and, eventually, lunar orbit. 

FunFact: The US can send a mission to Mars in seven months.  

The Bottom Line: Don’t get us started. Longtime readers of ours know our position: we could’ve had humans on Mars in the 1980s if we’d wanted to but we didn’t want to. Our loss. The fact our good friends in South Korea are just now getting their first lunar excursion off the ground and that it is taking them four months to get to the moon merely reinforces a point we made here recently: that the Apollo program was ahead of its time.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – It’s complete chaos at the hotel. Today’s Diary. 

So ol’ Sparrow was thrown back to the Stone Age again, no longer able to run the nite audit or do billing in the back office, nor is he willing to count money out front with the window uncovered…There is simply too much big-league private security experience here to risk it…Plus, and this is the ultimate horror, we are now obliged to do billing without the benefit of watching the old Bob Newhart Show. 

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On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it.  

In 1945 – France, the Soviet Union, the United Kingdom, and the United States sign the London Charter, which established rules and procedures for trying Nazis at the Nuremberg Trials. The charter established three classes of crimes: crimes against peace, war crimes, and crimes against humanity, and the Nuremberg Trials began in November and lasted until October 1946. The charter would later be used as a framework for war crimes trials against the Japanese. 

In 1870 – The United States, represented by the New York Yacht Club, defends the America’s Cup for the first time, with the schooner Magic defeating 16 other American boats and the Cambria, which represented the defending champion from Great Britain. The first America’s Cup – then known as the Hundred Guinea Cup, had been run in British waters in 1851 and the New York Yacht Club would defend the Cup 23 more times until Australia won it in 1983. The 2024 America’s Cup will see New Zealand defending off the coast of Barcelona, Spain. 

In 1987 – U2 is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For. The song also went to #1 in the band’s native Ireland, peaked at #6 in Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 23rd-biggest song of the year. It was the second and final #1 song for the group and the song’s last appearance on a Billboard chart came earlier this year when the song peaked at #22 on the Hot Rock and Alternative Songs chart. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

He pioneered the monetizing of slaves, just as he pioneered their industrialization and diversification.
Henry Wiencek
Master of the Mountain: Thomas Jefferson and His Slaves

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The commander of US Marines at the Battle of Guadalcanal was Brigadier General Alexander Vandegrift. Vandegrift would later serve as Commandant of the Marine Corps. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

How many nations have won the America’s Cup? – Answer next time!

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