The Daily Dose/Tuesday, July 28, 2020

The Daily Dose/July 28, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from our human experience. 

PLAY BALL…OR NOT: It was bound to happen, of course, a major league baseball team is ravaged with positive coronavirus tests. It happened to the Miami Marlins this past weekend and their two-game series at home against Baltimore was postponed. The Marlins had played in Philadelphia over the weekend, and the Phillies’ Monday game against the New York Yankees was postponed, too, and it is not reasonable to believe these will be the only postponements. 

Fly In The Ointment: This isn’t a death knell to the season, of course, because all teams have a pool of players to fill in, but these players aren’t playing baseball right now. The minor league season was canceled, so taxi-squad players are merely taking batting practice and fielding grounders and while they might be in decent shape, their timing will not be there and they are not prepared to play major league baseball. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Which brings up the integrity of the record book. Namely, what if major league records are established off of players that really don’t belong in the big leagues? What if someone hits five home runs or doubles in a game or pitcher strikes out 23 batters against players who otherwise would never have been in the big leagues?

This will cut to the very foundation of the game: since the first big league game was played in 1876 major league baseball has always been played by the best players. If the season continues like this there will come a time this year when it is not. Baseball will merely be another TV product be peddled so people can sell us cars and beer and pizza.

The Bottom Line: There are two ways to handle this. One is to stop getting worked up about COVID-19. The worldwide death rate is  0.000831% and the death rate amongst closed cases is 6%. The totals in the US are a bit higher – 0.000455% and 7% – but if we all wore our masks these totals would be lower and perhaps even manageable enough to allow fans into stadiums and arenas again. 

The other way to handle it is to not play. Leagues are tripping over themselves to proclaim safety is their first priority but don’t kid yourself: if it was, they wouldn’t be playing. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow announces his victory in the Stapler Placement War. Today’s Diary.  

Usually, when I come in the stapler is immediately next to the key machine, a lousy place for it because one, a stapler isn’t used all that often and you generally don’t need immediate access to it and, two, it gets in the way of making keys, and I always move it, usually next to the stand the left computer monitor rests on. 

The past couple of nights, tho, I’ve noticed the evil Mr Stapler hasn’t been next to the key machine…Honestly, ol’ Sparrow didn’t really think too much about it because I have so few stapler needs its relative position is seldom thought about…This morning, however, Tammy held the formal surrender ceremony, heralding the victory after having concluded the Sparrow Placement is in humanity’s best interest. 

Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: Gaylon deals with a guest who’s peeved at him because he lost his wallet. 

He got pretty worked up, too, and eventually I had to lay the hammer down and tell him not to get cross with me. Eventually, he gave an accurate description of where he left it so I dispatched Bi-Bob to look for it but it wasn’t there anymore, hardly the Upset of the Year. I took the guy’s number and told him we would look for it.

A few minutes later Russ is preparing to relieve me and the guy shows up at the podium. He’s a short Canadian with long hair and he wants to know right now exactly what MCSD is doing to find his wallet. He is even demanding to review video coverage of the incident so he can get to the bottom of this whole mess

$2.99 for 4Ever & Ever access to these two American classics. THIS OFFER ENDS TODAY!

 

On This Date
History’s long march to today.

In 1945 – A US Army B-25 bomber crashes into the 79th floor of the Empire State Building, killing three crewmen and eleven people in the building and injuring 26 others. The plane crashed into the offices of the National Catholic Welfare Council and created an 18×20-foot hole in the building with damage estimated at $1 million, about $14 million in today’s money. The plane had been on a routine transport mission and had disregarded warnings about severely limited visibility due to fog. 

In 1993 – Ken Griffey, Jr of the Seattle Mariners ties the major league record for most consecutive games with a home run in a 10-8 victory over the Minnesota Twins. Griffey homered in his eighth consecutive game, tying the mark established by Dale Long of the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1956 and tied by Don Mattingly of the New York Yankees in 1987. Griffey’s record-tying home run was a grand slam in the third inning off of Kevin Tapani. Griffey’s streak was broken the following game and the records still stand. 

In 1973 – Donna Fargo is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as Hot Country Singles chart – for the only week with You Were Always There. It was the fourth chart single for Fargo, all of which went to #1 and her fourth of six #1 songs and fourth of 14 Top 10 hits. The song spent 14 weeks on the country chart, including six weeks in the Top 10. The song also peaked at #93 on Billboard’s Hot 100. 

Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

His images are unforgettable because he was conceiving new forms and discovering new meanings, not just dutifully illustrating a predetermined text. He works by instinct…his independence of mind opening up new possibilities. – Miles Unger, Michelangelo: A Life in Six Masterpieces

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

The first instrumental #1 song on the Hot 100 was The Happy Organ by Dave “Baby” Cortez, which was #1 for one week in 1959. 

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

How many top 40 hits did Donna Fargo have on Billboard’s Hot 100? – Answer next time!

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