The Diary of a Nobody/October 28

Read Free Fortnight continues!

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Sunday, October 28
About 0500 or so a guy comes down for his morning coffee at Hotel B…He notes the automatic doors up front and wonders if animals ever wander in…No, I told him, I have never seen it but now that I think about it, if an animal ever did wander in I’m probably up a creek…Here at Hotel B there aren’t a whole lot of options…There is not a back office for me to flee too and even if there was, I am generally sitting at a table in the corner of the lobby and would be cornered…If I’m at the front desk or am quick enough to move without being mauled to death, I could flee to the manager’s office, but that requires entering five digit code to open the goddamn door, crucial lost seconds that could result in my death.

Now that I think about it, tho, having an animal wander in is not completely out of the question…You don’t have to walk right up to the door to open it, they open if you’re within a couple, maybe even a few, feet and I suppose some animal could inadvertantly open a door, get curious and want to see what’s shaking in the lobby and maybe ol’ Sparrow will give you a good rate on a room because we are pet friendly….There’s not much danger at Hotel C, though…There is a back office and I could lock the front door and the back door, across from the restaurant, has a number code lock anyway.

Very short-handed at the retailer tonight, so shorthanded my arrival was heralded like a conquering hero returning, with Sally and Daniel all saying they were glad to see me when I reported for duty…Apparently there were a couple of call-offs and Jacki left early to get  ahead start on her week off in New York where her daughter is getting married, and it was only ol’ Sparrow manning the service desk tonight…Fortunately we were dead slow.

We have to check out our own individual tills now…There had been rumors this was forthcoming but you never get too worked up over rumored changes because if you paid attention to every rumor you’d lose your mind because half of them never happen.  

This one did, tho…I had to go to the cash machine at Aisle 5, scan my palm (which had been set up last week, actually) and get $200 in cash and coins so I could go work the service desk…At the end of the shift, I had check my till back in…I am not entirely certain why they are doing this…When I leave for a break my drawer is still there and any other cashier can use it if need be…Supervisor Mary said this process screws up her audits, tho I forget why.

I had a guy come up to me with a problem he solved himself…It completely ruled, first-class customer service and I didn’t have to do squat…What happened was his debit card wasn’t working at self-checkout…It was a prepaid card, issued by the retailer, actually, and he said he had just found it and hadn’t used it “for a long time”.

I think I need a PIN number…I could just call the 800 number on the back of the card, couldn’t I???

He caught me off guard…It’s not often customers solve their own problems.

Uh, yeah, sure…

To save face and actually make it look I knew what was going on, I took the card and inspected the back, to make sure there was, in fact, an 800 number there…There was, and to emphasize my authority in this matter, I pointed to it with a finger.

It’s right there…Probably open 24 hours, too.

And guys, if your girl is all dolled up for a night out with you, why not get all dressed up, too???…Good gravy, there was this couple in their 20’s wandering around the store…The girl was rather pretty, with a short red dress (it’s still unseasonably warm) and knee-high boots…Guys, in this situation, please show some effort…A clean shirt…Clean boots…Pants that don’t have an outline of your snuff can on a back pocket…Make your date feel like she’s on a date and not cattle drive.

Reported for my first graveyard shift at Hotel C, training with a nice young lady named Jessie…The night audit is a lot longer here than at Hotel B, or anywhere else I’ve worked, but it’s not that hard and there was still lots of time to fart around.

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 0900 Sunday until 1430 Sunday…This, too, is turning into the norm for start of the Sleep Week (SW)…I was up, feeling rested, before the 1530 alarm…Feeling good, I had my morning constitutional and got the coffee going…Usually the cat is good for wandering out and issuing a greeting, but not today, she was napping on a kitchen table chair.

The weekly total from last week was 46.5 hours, and this was with seven sleep sessions…Regular readers of this crap know this is what I get in a pretty good week working five graveyard shifts, which offer only six sleep sessions.

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.

It was inspired by the 19th century British novel of the same name.

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