The Diary of a Nobody/February 27

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Saturday, February 27
I could tell as I reported for duty at the hotel that Q had a smug look under his mask and that he would have some news to report. 

He did, and it concerns the heated, to-the-death January rewards club sign-up race he was in with Amy…Recall, Amy won by a few signups – more because of a scheduling quirk the last couple days of the month than anything – and Q did not take it well and Amy lorded it over him, as well she should have. 

Well, there was news on that front because it seemed not all of Amy’s email addresses were valid, which means they were taken off her total and there enuff invalid ones to make Q the January reward club sign-up champion, something that pleased him more than it probably should have, tho as a show of solidarity yours truly nodded significantly and threw his hands up in triumph. 

Right before Q leaves the phone rings and it’s 154 wondering what the chances are for a late check-out…These are a pain in the neck for housekeeping when we’re busy and ol’ Sparrow is able to dismiss these requests out of hand, but Q is not…I make a motion for Q to pay attention and I tell the guest, after issuing an apology, that I was unable to offer a late checkout in the morning.

That’s all you have to say and it always works…One, I’m taking responsibility and not passing it off on management or housekeeping, which guests appreciate and, two, it’s firm and doesn’t invite argument…I hung up and told Q to write that down because class was in session…No hemming or hawing, merely a polite, professional way of saying no.

The big news is ol’ Sparrow set a personal best this morning for Highest Walk-in Rate Ever Charged: $350.00, plus tax…I am not making that up…It was about 0400 and I was out front setting up morning coffee service when this guy walks in, asking about a room for the night…Sure, I still a couple of vacant rooms, and I priced it to move, too: $129, plus tax, a steal for Ski Town, USA on a weekend in ski season…I might as well have just handed him a key.

So I dive in on checking him it but then he asks for his ID and credit card back and says he wants to make a call to verify he’ll be reimbursed…OK, I return his stuff to him and cancel the transaction and write it off as a no sale because they seldom come back in these situations. 

Later, about 0420 or so, I’m restocking the sundry stand and he comes back in and says reimbursement be damned, he’ll do it, adding he would present no violent objection to staying Saturday nite, too. 

Let me see what I can do, sir. 

So I actually put some work in and determined that we have one room with one king bed that is available right now and good for Saturday nite, too…Well, he’s a nice kid, and a tired workingman to boot and there’s really no reason to quibble over separate rates for the rest of tonight and Saturday nite. 

Look, the rate for check-in after 1500 Saturday is $279, plus tax.
I hold out a hand, the universal symbol of someone about to make an offer.
How about $350, plus tax…You check-in now and you’re good until checkout at 11 am Sunday morning. 

He didn’t even blink accepting it…And while $350, plus tax, is a lot of money, he’s good in a nice hotel until Sunday morning, a leisurely day off and then some. 

Management will love the $350 rate, too, because it will bump up our average daily rate (ADR), a familiar tool at any hotel but one they absolutely go ga-ga over here…It’s way better than charging separate rates for two nights: whatever I can get for what remains of Friday night and whatever the system is asking (known as the rack rate in the trade) for Saturday night because the system shows the booking as a Saturday check-in and a Sunday departure, a one-night stay. 

The knife only got modest use this morning, while yours truly was setting up morning coffee service (MCS)…A new box of those wooden stirrers was needed for the drawer, so one was retrieved from the storage room next to the ice machine and the knife was pressed into service to remove the film. 

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1500 Saturday until 2130 Saturday…48.0 hours for the week and a whopping 49.0-hour per-week average for the month.  

Whopping, but not a record and only the longest-tenured regular readers of this crap may – or they may not – recall the historic 51.5-hour weekly average of January 2019…Still tho, a heck of a month in the sack.  

The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence. 

It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name. 

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