Yes, it’s Read Free Sunday (RFS) at The Diary.
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Saturday, December 2
Boy, the lobby was busy when we reported for duty at the hotel tonite and the Assistant Front Desk Manager (AFDM) was not particularly happy, either…It had been a busy nite and the adults in the lobby were hockey parents and while they drank brewskies, yapped, and played cards their kids were running around terrorizing the hallways…The AFDM had fielded a variety of complaints and was even moved to write a note of apology, with the envelope we slid under the door appearing to contain enuff complimentary breakfast vouchers to feed the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
The AFDM really made out on the pizza front tonite, too…There were two boxes on the back office desk and he also had an Amazon package to take home so his hands were full…We suggested consolidating the pizza in one box – a suggestion the AFDM liked – but it turned out both had full pizzas in them and we have a high-level street cred here so we showed him a palm, and told him not to bother, it would simply cause more trouble than it’s worth.
The AFDM also had details about the hotel’s Christmas party…It will be Tuesday the 19th at 1600 in one of the restaurant’s conference rooms…Well, hell…Like you probably are, we’re wondering exactly who has a company Christmas party at 1600 on a Tuesday – tho it’s probably not a completely unreasonable time – but more than anything we’re lamenting the fact that we’re sleeping at 1600 on Tuesdays and can’t make it…This means or dream of entering wearing two pinkie rings and the shearling is shot to hell, but you can’t live your life as a slave to fashion.
Once the AFDM left, it seemed chaotic enuff for ol’ Sparrow, ever the professional, to walk the hotel soon after assuming command…Call it the instincts all the great ones have if you must, but it was a good call because no sooner had we entered the hotel than the front desk mobile rang, with 253 calling to tattle on 251…It seems there are a lot of kids in there making a ruckus…We get to the room and end up knocking three times, the kids quieting down but not answering the door…We said we were from the front desk and that everything was OK and could they please open the door…We tried to sound reassuring but there’s not much reassuring in this situation for a nine-year-old so, our mission a failure, we headed back to the front desk.
On the way there it occured to us that the grownups assigned to 251 might very well be partying down in the lobby…Bingo, we called it, dead solid perfect…Then the dumb broad who fessed up to being in the room said she’d call them and we said no, that was unsatisfactory, the matter needs to be dealt with right now…Well, give her credit; she knew when the tablets were coming down from Mount Sinai and she got up and left.
The restaurant was in the paper today, the usual new-business story the paper can generally be counted on to deliver…(Whether these are contingent on an advertising buy isn’t clear, but we tend to doubt it because it’s not very ethical…Our paper may not be up for Paper of the Year, but it does seem to be pretty ethical.)…The story wasn’t too bad, there was some journalism so it wasn’t a strait press release and hopefully it will help erase the bad feelings that came when the name was changed because the old restaurant was very popular.
No Saturday workout today!!!…I am not making that up.
We’re not entirely certain what happened…We did move snow from the driveway, marking the season’s first use of The Chariot snowblower, and maybe that got us a second wind because we did not get to sleep until afternoon (see Sleep Log below)…It was a rather pleasant time tho, as we got some good reading in and listened to some stuff and rest assured nothing useful around The Shire was accomplished.
The big news is The Chariot started right up…Recall there are about five different things that have to be done before it will start and – in the Upset of the Year – we remembered all of them…Well, we did screw the choke up, having it in the wrong position, hardly a bulletin because the choke has always confused us, but you didn’t have to edit Road & Track to figure it out how to correct it…There had been a nice dumping overnite – there were six inches on the new ride at the hotel and there was only a slightly lesser amount at The Shire – and the town had left a modest berm at the driveway, but none of it was any match for The Chariot, which had the driveway cleared in a few minutes.
Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1430 Saturday until 2130 Saturday…7.0 hours for the day and 48.5 hours for the week…These totals aren’t too bad considering, but you hate to miss workout and proof that we will whine about anything can be found in the fact we are already fussing over whether or not we’ll get to sleep too late Sunday to get a workout in.
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The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence.
It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name.
Coming soon! Gaylon’s books in actual book form!
