The Daily Dose/Friday, August 17, 2018

The Daily Dose/August 17, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

And here we go:

In The News
You know Mr President, if you need a Soviet-era military parade to show the world how big your schlong is, you can order one. You will look childish and America will look silly, but you’re the commander-in-chief of the armed forces and if you decree that all hands drop and give you 20 at high noon Greenwich Mean Time (GMT), you know what? All hands are going to drop and give you 20 at high noon GMT. You’re the boss, and if you want a parade, they will put on a parade for you, although apparently now it won’t happen until 2019.

But you know what? You’ve got some bank, pay for it yourself. The new $93 million price tag is abhorrent and insulting. Instead of spending it on Veteran’s Day revels, why don’t you spend it on the thousands of veterans who right now are not getting the care they need and earned.

Today At The Site
Sparrow and The Wife have their first day off at home together in quite a while on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. And the day is just packed! Sparrow has the latest from the dentist, plus they cleaned the living room which, of course, includes Sparrow’s office, plus they go to the hot springs way out in the mountains and the excitement is concluded with pork chops for dinner.

The Thought for the Day returns with a quote from Dr David Myers, a nice quote about taking the stairs to the top instead of an elevator.

On This Date
In 1915 – Leo Frank is lynched by a mob in Marietta, Georgia, one day after being kidnapped from prison. Two years earlier, Frank had been convicted of murdering a 13-year-old girl and sentenced to death. Citing new evidence, his sentence had been commuted to life in prison, a decision that did not go over well with local citizens. Later, photographs of the lynching were sold as postcards in the area for 25 cents, about $6 in today’s money, and Frank was posthumously pardoned for the murder for in 1986.

In 2008 – American swimmer Michael Phelps becomes the first person to win eight gold medals at one Olympiad, as part of the 4×100 meter medley team at the Beijing Games. The record had been held by American Mark Spitz, who had won seven gold medals at the 1972 Munich Games.

In 1963 – Little Stevie Wonder is at #1 for the second of three weeks on the Billboard Hot 100 with Fingertips Pt 2. The song was originally an instrumental, with the lyrics improvised by Wonder, who was then 13. The song was the first live recording to hit #1 on the Hot 100, and Wonder remains the youngest solo act to hit #1.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Albert “Happy” Chandler was the Kentucky governor who was later commissioner of baseball.

Today’s Stumper
What athlete has won the most medals at an Olympics without winning a gold medal? – Answer next time!

Shameless Plugs
Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: A Vegas Memoir!: Clock in with the graveyard crew at the Monte Carlo Security Department on the glamorous Las Vegas Strip. You’ll meet drunks, reprobates and scoundrels, and those are just the officers! The funniest Vegas memoir ever! Promise!

The Regular Guys: Meet Lenny and Larry, two comedians who team up more or less out of desperation and become the biggest in show business. As funny as you would expect from Gaylon, and poignant, too.

Click here to read previews of both!

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