The Daily Dose/Wednesday, September 2, 2020

The Daily Dose/September 2, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience.

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow fixes the microwave at the hotel.  

…but all wasn’t lost because there’s both a restaurant and empty rooms with microwaves but then I seemed to remember this happening before and it being fixed…Unfortunately, ol’ Sparrow wasn’t entirely sure how it was fixed, but the only troubleshooting option, outside of beating it senseless, was unplugging it and plugging it back in again, so that’s what I did and, after resetting the clock, was feasting two minutes later. 

Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: Jo(s)e points out Gaylon currently doesn’t have a woman. 

I managed to qualify, but there was a shot in the head and one in the crotch of my target. Jo(s)e pointed out the crotch shot and I told him it meant don’t mess with my woman, cause I’d just as soon shoot you as look at you. Jo(s)e pointed out I don’t currently have a woman, and I told him not to worry about that, just file it away for future reference. 

Editor’s Note: The Bottom Ten will run Thursday. 

Free Stuff
The same trick the drug dealers use.

Backstairs at the Monte Carlo
Clock in with the graveyard crew of the Monte Carlo Security Department on the glamorous Las Vegas Strip.
Click here for the first two months of the funniest Vegas memoir ever. 

Criminals, Courtesans and Constables
Gaylon’s latest novel takes place everywhere from throne rooms to death row.
Click here to read the first four chapters with our compliments.

The Regular Guys
Coming soon! Meet Lenny and Larry, two comedians going nowhere on their own who team up and become the biggest act in show business. 

Click on the button to get started to read The Diary of a Nobody, Backstairs at the Monte Carlo and Criminals, Courtesans and Constables for only $4.99, a steal. 

On This Date
The long march to today.

In 1945 – World War II officially ends as surrender documents between Japan and the United States and her allies are signed on board the battleship USS Missouri in Tokyo Bay. Japan had first indicated its desire to surrender after the US dropped its second atomic bomb on Nagasaki on Aug 9. The Japanese delegation wore formal attire, while most US officers wore their khaki work uniform. The Missouri is now a museum ship in Pearl Harbor. 

In 1996 – Mike Greenwell of the Boston Red Sox establishes a new major league record for most RBIs in a game that accounted for all of a team’s runs in a 9-8, 10-inning win over the Seattle Mariners. Greenwell went 4-for-5 with a single, double and two home runs, including the go-ahead RBI in the tenth inning. The record for a nine-inning game is eight, done by George Kelly of the New York Giants in 1924 and Bob Johnson of the Philadelphia Athletics in 138. 

In 1967 – The Beatles are at #1 on Billboard’s album chart – then known as the Top LPs chart – for the eleventh of 15 consecutive weeks with Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. It was the group’s tenth of 19 #1 albums and the album also went to #1 in six other countries, including 27 weeks at #1 in Great Britain and was Billboard’s tenth biggest album of 1967 and sixth biggest of 1968. The album won four Grammy Awards, including Album of the Year.

Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

…the Greeks, who had once been a nation of athletes, became now a nation of spectators, content to witness rather than to do. – Will Durant, The Story of Civilization, Vol. II: The Story of Greece

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

After his playing career, Russ Nixon later managed the Cincinnati Reds and the Atlanta Braves. 

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

Who holds the major league record for most RBIs in a game? – Answer next time!

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