The Daily Dose/August 4, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

HUT, HUT, HIKE II: Details of the media deal secured by the Pac-12 have emerged: roughly $20 million a year for a streaming deal for the nine remaining universities and you don’t have to be Nick Saban to know this will mean a mass exodus for every school able to secure a better deal with another conference.  

Crystal Ball Me: Maybe Stanford and Cal will say no to the madness. That is not the morning line favorite, of course, but they may decide that multiple trips across multiple time zones for every sport is not in their player’s best interest. 

Dry, Technical Matter: If they do stay, the Pac-12 has a fighting chance. They’d join Oregon State and Washington State, whom nobody wants anyway, and you throw in San Diego State, UNLV, Colorado State, Air Force, SMU, and one or two others and there is a viable conference there. 

Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury: We’re hardly media insiders here, but we can’t help feeling that if the TV networks had wanted the Pac-12 around, there would’ve been a deal a while ago. With the Pac-12 gone, though, there is less competition for viewers for their SEC and Big Ten games. 

The Bottom Line: Goodbye Pac-12. You gave it a good, honorable run for over a century but times change and you were either unwilling and/or unable to change with them and these are the consequences for that. Every remaining school that wants to will flee for the best deal they can get as soon as they can get it. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow, again, manages not to do the lawn. Today’s Diary. 

Now, regular readers of this crap know we’ve used a forecast calling for scattered showers as an excuse to put off doing the lawn, but this morning it was legitimate…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1977 – The Department of Energy is formed, following an energy crisis in 1973. It was formed with the goal of energy conservation and forming alternate energy sources and today manages the research and development of US nuclear power and overseas 17 national laboratories. The department would begin operation on Oct 1 and the first Secretary of Energy was James Schlesinger, who had previously been Secretary of Defense and director of the CIA. 

In 1984 – Mary Lou Retton becomes the first American to win the Olympic all-around gymnastics gold medal at the Los Angeles Summer Games. It was the only Olympic appearance for Retton, who also won silver medals in the all-around team and vault competitions, and bronze medals in the uneven bars and floor exercises. American women have won the last five individual all-around gymnastic gold medals. 

In 2018 – Bebe Rexha and Florida Georgia Line establish a Billboard country chart record for most weeks at #1 when Meant to Be is at the top for the 35th consecutive week. The song broke the record of 34 weeks established in 2017 by Sam Brown with Body Like a Back Road. Meant to Be would eventually spend a total of 50 consecutive weeks at #1, a record for a major Billboard singles chart that still stands. The song also peaked at #2 on Billboard’s Hot 100. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

There is nothing that so much seduces reason from vigilance as the thought of passing life with an amiable woman.
Samuel Johnson

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Besides Teofilo Stevenson, the other two boxers to win Olympic three Olympic boxing gold medals were Felix Savon (Cuba) and Laszlo Papp (Hungary). Seven others have won three total boxing medals. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Before the Department of Energy, what was the last cabinet-level department formed? – Answer next time!

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose will return.

Click here to read today’s entry in The Diary of a Nobody.

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/August 2, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

HUT, HUT, HIKE: One of the things we’re looking forward to this college football season is seeing whether or not the Pac-12 will survive. This is the final year of their current alignment as next year USC and UCLA move to the Big Ten (!) and Colorado returns to the Big 12. This leaves the conference with nine teams. 

Lights, Cameras, Action The Pac-12’s current TV deal expires after this school year and Tuesday the conference shared details of an offer with its members. It’s with a streaming service and you don’t have to be Roone Arledge to know that this will pay a lot less than other conferences are getting. 

A Classic Yay/Boo Situation: On the one hand, yay because it’s the third decade of the 21st century and we should be able to watch games wherever the hell we want and it could be the Pac-12 is at the vanguard of a revolution. On the other hand, boo, because they probably aren’t, because a streaming deal is not going to pay Pac-12 schools $30 million a year and all that matters is money now and it is not unreasonable to expect every school that can flee to do so as soon as they can. 

The Bottom Line: It’s hard to say whether Congress or the NCAA does a better of simultaneously being pimp, whore, and john. Both continue to offer master classes in the art and it ain’t going to change. Cal and Stanford might show some sense and say no to the insane travel being in the Big Ten or Big 12 would provide, and we would not die of shock if the Cardinal and Bears join Oregon State and Washington State in the Mountain West Conference. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow’s Tuesday morning routine is shaken to the core. Today’s Diary. 

The big news – and it’s huge – is there was not an appearance by Dray the Dairy Delivery Driver (DDDD) this morning…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

Editor’s Note: due to time constraints, these items have run before.

In 216 BC – The Carthaginians, led by Hannibal and outnumbered by over 30,000 men, defeat the Romans in the Battle of Cannae in the Second Punic War in southeastern Italy. Despite his inferior numbers, Hannibal was able to surround the Romans and all but annihilate them, the Roman death toll of over 48,000 remaining one of the largest single-day death totals in the history of battle. The Second Punic War would last until 201 BC and result in a Roman victory. 

In 1980 – Teofilo Stevenson of Cuba becomes the first boxer to win three Olympic gold medals in one division at the Moscow Summer Olympics. Stevenson defeated Pyotr Zayev of the Soviet Union 4-1 to add to the gold medals won in 1972 and 1976. Stevenson was not allowed to compete at either the 1984 or 1988 Olympics due to Cuba’s boycott, but he would go on to win the gold medal at the 1986 world championships. Stevenson died in 2012 at age 60. 

In 2008 – Katy Perry is at # on the Billboard Hot 100 for the fifth of seven consecutive weeks with I Kissed a Girl. It was the first chart single for Perry and her first of nine #1 songs. The song went to #1 in 17 other countries including the Czech Republic, Norway, and Great Britain, and was Billboard’s 14th biggest song of the year. The song was the 1,000th #1 song of the Rock Era, which began on July 8, 1955, when Bill Haley and the Comets hit #1 with Rock Around the Clock. The Hot 100 debuted in 1958. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

The first lesson of philosophy is we cannot be wise about everything. We are fragments in infinity and moments in eternity; for such forked atoms to describe the universe, or the Supreme Being, must make the planets tremble with mirth.
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization, Vol. III: From Caesar to Christ

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Louis Armstrong is the oldest act to hit #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100. He was 62 when Hello Dolly went to #1 in 1964. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who are the two other boxers to win three Olympic boxing gold medals? – Answer next time!

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/August 1, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Editor’s Note: the fresh content we had planned for today has been held pending new developments. This ran one year ago today and is still relevant. 

GET OUT YOUR HISTORY BOOKS: Recently here we whined about the uninspiring prospects for the 2024 presidential election. It would follow a general trend in this country because, as we’ve noted here before, this country hasn’t had decent leadership by an elected president since Kennedy said let’s go to the moon. 

But We Digress: We always felt Gerald Ford did well under circumstances the Son of Man would have found trying and that History has redeemed his pardoning of Richard Nixon. But Ford wasn’t elected; he had been nominated and confirmed as vice president to replace Spiro Agnew and, of course, assumed the presidency when Richard Nixon resigned. 

Here We Go: Johnson got mired in Vietnam and declared war on poverty, even though that enemy has been with us since time immemorial and is never going away. Nixon could’ve been great, but his demons overtook him and he resigned in disgrace. Carter meant well but was ineffective and got bogged down in deciding who could and could not use the White House tennis court. Reagan, a genius at articulating his views simply, was the most managed president in history, a burden his successors have allowed themselves to fall victim to. 

Pause For Breath: George H.W. Bush was another Carter, Clinton, heck, he could’ve been great, too, but it was always something with him and he ended up getting impeached. George W Bush lied to get us into war, Obama talked a good game but left our country much as he found it, Trump was the worst elected leader in human history, an ignoramus with blood on his hands, whose only real talent is drawing attention to himself. Biden has yet to finish his term, so he may well work his way off of the Jimmy Carter pile, though we doubt it. 

Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury: Why the dearth of leadership over the past 60 years? I mean, it’s hardly as if America has not had good, or even great, presidential leadership in the past. Sure, there have been some stinkers in there over the centuries, but the presidential landscape is dotted with talent like Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and both Roosevelts. We even give Truman high marks for having the courage to nuke Japan, a decision that saved hundreds of thousands of American lives. 

The Bottom Line: America, however, has stopped demanding greatness. We are into our fourth generation of television being the focal point of our American life and we are paying for it with a country that, collectively, has stopped demanding anything other than being well-fed and well-entertained, content to blindly accept whatever the party of our choice chooses to spoonfeed us. As a result, we have a country that’s a shooting gallery, constantly at war, with social divides that are making the 60s seem like something out of Mother Goose. We deserve better than this, but we are not demanding it.    

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has a guest who needs a room for her and her brother, who was just released from the hospital. Today’s Diary. 

Maybe he hurt himself passing out from boredom after watching the balloon rodeo. 

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1980 – Vigdis Finnbogadottir becomes the world’s first democratically elected female head of state when she is elected president of Iceland. Running against three men, she won with 33.6% of the vote and would be reelected three times, twice running unopposed, and served until 1996 when she declined to run for another term. She remains Iceland’s only female president and, at 95, is currently a UNESCO goodwill ambassador. 

In 1992 – Gail Devers of the US wins the gold medal in the women’s 100-meters at the Barcelona Summer Olympics. Devers won with a time of 10.82 seconds in the closest Olympic women’s 100-meter race ever, with just .06 seconds, mere inches, separating the first five finishers. It was the first of three Olympic gold medals for Devers, who would defend her title at the 1996 Atlanta Games, where she also was a member of the gold medal-winning 4 x 100-meter relay team. 

In 1960 – Brenda Lee is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the third and final consecutive week with I’m Sorry. It was the third of 29 Top 40 hits for Lee, her third of 13 Top 10 hits, and her first of two #1s. The song also went to #1 in New Zealand, peaked at #12 in Great Britain, at #4 on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 6th-biggest song of the year. Lee was 15 at the time, then the youngest act to have a #1 song, a mark now held by Michael Jackson. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

…it makes no difference at all who wins. The world goes on.
Gore Vidal
Creation

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The Royal Navy was founded in 1546 by King Henry VIII.  

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

Who is the oldest act to have a #1 song on the Hot 100? – Answer next time!

Share Gaylon! Go!

The Daily Dose/July 31, 2023
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off will return. Promise.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow continues to be unmoved by the balloon rodeo. Today’s Diary. 

We pretended we were as excited as they were, but what we really wanted to tell them was “look, this was a thing in the 18th century, this is hardly a hot, new technology…

———

Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

———

On This Date
Extra, extra, read all about it. 

In 1970 – The Royal Navy issues its last rum ration to sailors. The British drink ration had started in the 17th century with sailors receiving one gallon of beer a day, with rum being substituted in 1655 because of the difficulty in carrying that much beer onboard. The ration was issued at the usual time of 11 am, with the occasion being marked in some places by the wearing of black armbands and the procession of caskets. History refers to the day as Black Tot Day, with tot being the term for the rum ration. 

In 2012 – Michael Phelps of the US establishes a new Olympic record for most career medals won in the American win in the 4 X 200 meter freestyle relay at the London Summer Olympics. It was the 19th Olympic medal for Phelps, breaking the record established by Soviet gymnast Larissa Natynina from 1956-64. Phelps would retire from Olympic competition in 2016 with 28 medals, 23 of them gold, both Olympic records that still stand. 

In 2010 – Eminem featuring Rihanna is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of seven consecutive weeks with Love the Way You Lie. The song went to #1 in 21 other countries, including Luxembourg, Norway, and Israel, peaked at #2 in Great Britain, at #7 on Billboard’s soul chart, and was Billboard’s 7th-biggest song of the year. It was the fourth and most recent #1 song for Eminem and the 13th of 14 #1s for Rihanna. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.

Cleopatra encouraged him to dare the last gamble for omnipotence…
Will Durant
The Story of Civilization: Vol. III: Caesar to Christ

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Three South American countries have hosted the men’s World Cup: Uruguay, Brazil, and Argentina. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.

When was the Royal Navy founded? – Answer next time!

Share Gaylon! Go!