The Daily Dose/Wednesday, January 19, 2022
The Daily Dose/January 19, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
Leading Off is running intermittently right now.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – At the hotel, Sparrow runs into someone who will not ring the bell. Today’s Diary.
“HEY, GOOD MORNING!”
The second time it sounded like an order and you gotta do something here…It’s not reasonable to presume he’ll ring the bell – the Liberty Bell could be out front and he’d ignore it – and if you don’t go out the next thing you know he’s probably yelling and while yours truly prefers the bell be rung, I’m not here to piss guests off…
The Bottom Ten/The Best Of 2021 – It’s all over: The 2021 Best Of column – the traditional end to the Bottom Ten year – runs today. It’s on the house, too, so cheapskates can see the fun they missed out on. Thank you for reading and mark your calendars, it’s only 216 days until the 2022 Preseason Q&A runs on August 23.
We say this every year because it’s true: if you enjoyed reading The Bottom Ten half as much as we enjoyed producing it, you enjoyed it an awful lot.
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Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
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On This Date
History’s long march.
In 1946 – US Army General Douglas McArthur establishes the International Military Tribunal for the Far East, a court to try Japanese leaders on assorted war crimes charges. The trials would begin in April in Tokyo with judges, prosecutors and other staff provided by the eleven countries that had declared war on Japan with American and Japanese lawyers providing defense counsel. 28 high-ranking Japanese were tried by the court with seven receiving death sentences and 16 receiving life imprisonment.
In 1974 – The Notre Dame Fighting Irish end the UCLA Bruins NCAA record 88-game winning streak with a 71-70 victory at South Bend. The streak had begun on January 30, 1971 with a win over UC-Santa Barbara and Notre Dame had been the last team to beat the Bruins, 89-82, seven days before that. The Bruin’s mark is still the men’s all-time NCAA record and the overall mark is held by the Connecticut women’s team, who won 111 straight games from 2014-17.
In 1974 – Jim Croce is at #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the second of five consecutive weeks with You Don’t Mess Around With Jim. First released in 1972, it was Croce’s first of six chart albums and remains his only #1. The album produced three chart singles including the #1 Time in a Bottle (two weeks, 1973-74). Croce was only 30-years-old when he had died the previous September in a plane crash in Louisiana.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
…the State Department was one of the most tranquil, even somnolent, of government ministries…where, barring the rare excitement of the odd Indian war, a man could sleep his way through the life of an administration, or get a book written.
Gore Vidal
Empire
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.
The NHL record for most shutouts in a season is 22, by George Hainsworth of the Montreal Canadiens in 1928-29. Hainsworth gave up 43 goals in 44 games – every game he won that season was a shutout – and his 0.92 goals-against average remains the NHL single-season record.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
Jim Croce had two #1 singles on Billboard’s Hot 100. What was the other one? – Answer next time!
The Bottom Ten/Best of 2021
As always, the final Bottom Ten of the season is offered the compliments of your Bottom Ten pollsters.
The Bottom Ten/Best Of 2021
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Friends, we’re glad you made it this far. We say this every year because it’s true: if you enjoyed reading The Bottom Ten half as much as we enjoyed producing it, you enjoyed it an awful lot.
See you next year. Thank you for reading.
Editor’s Note: lines are offered in chronological order.
Kansas – With Texas and Oklahoma set to join SEC, Kansas fan(s) nervous, left to wonder where else they are going to find two (2) guaranteed losses every season…
Duke – B-10 fan(s) everywhere circling 9/18 on calendars as Bleu Devils playing in annual B-10 Heritage Classic vs B-10 Hall of Fame laureates Northwestern.
The Daily Dose/Tuesday, January 18, 2022
The Daily Dose/January 18, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
Leading Off is running intermittently right now.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Creamer Challenge IV is in the books. Today’s Diary.
The victory was total, too, not even close…
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Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
History’s long march.
In 1919 – The Paris Peace Conference, a meeting of the victors in World War I to dictate peace terms to the losers – begins in Paris. The conference produced, among other things, the League of Nations, five peace treaties, redrawn national borders and imposed reparations on the Germans that were so severe they led to conditions inside Germany that would ultimately lead to World War II. US President Woodrow Wilson had arrived in December, marking the first time a sitting president had visited Europe.
In 1964 – Terry Sawchuck of the Detroit Red Wings establishes a new NHL record for most career shutouts in a 2-0 win over the Montreal Canadiens. It was the 95th shutout for Sawchuck, breaking the record of 94 established by George Hainsworth of the Canadiens and the Toronto Maple Leafs from 1926-37. Sawchuck would retire with 103 shutouts and the record is now 125, held by Martin Brodeur of the New Jersey Devils and St Louis Blues from 1991-2015.
In 1960 – Running Bear by Johnny Preston is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of three consecutive weeks. It was the first of five chart singles for Preston, his first of two Top 10 hits and remains his only #1 song. The song was written by J.P. Richardson, also known as the Big Bopper, and he provided background vocals, along with future country star George Jones, before he died in a plane crash the previous January. The song also went to #1 in Great Britain and New Zealand.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
It was hard to believe he had evolved through the natural process of conception, birth and growing up.
McKinley Kantor
Andersonville
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.
The Western Schism – a period of multiple claimants to the papacy – lasted from 1378-1477.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
Who holds the NHL record for most shutouts in a season? – Answer next time!
The Daily Dose/Monday, January 17, 2022
The Daily Dose/January 17, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.
CAPSULE BOOK REVIEW: Washington: A Life by Ron Chernow: One of the pleasures of reading biographies of those who are living down the ages is having confirmed things you might only have suspected, or finding out things you didn’t know at all.
Now You Know: One, while a significant landowner, Washington had extravagant tastes and was generally strapped for cash. Two, while Washington never had wooden teeth (nor did he ever admit to chopping down a cherry tree) he eventually lost all his teeth and tried a variety of forms of dentures over the years, none of them satisfactory.
Oh Hell, Let’s Leave It For Future Generations: Like others, he fretted over slavery but, also like others, Washington didn’t do anything about it while alive. His will, however, did specify the slaves he owned (as opposed to dowery slaves owned by his wife Martha’s estate) were to be freed after Martha’s death, a wonderful way to put a price on her head. Martha, no dummy, realized this and freed George’s slaves short after he died.
Running The Numbers: Hardly atypical of the era, Martha Washington buried two husbands, four children and seven siblings over her long life.
Back On Message: Despite winning the Revolution, Washington was not a great general. Like nation’s throughout history, the British found it difficult to fight on another continent and the French certainly did their part for the American cause. Washington’s great strength as a leader was his ability to always keep the ultimate goal in mind and to read and inspire others, to say this is where we are and this is where we are going, so strap it on and follow me.
The More Things Change…The More They Don’t: It was also comforting to know that America under President Washington was as much a partisan and bickering mess as it is today, with Thomas Jefferson, in particular, a conniving rascal.
’Tis Well: The chronicle of Washington’s death was adroit and poignant, a trait we’ve noticed from other biographers as if the final act of a life is deserving of more diligence and care than the other parts.
Your Daily Dose Rating Scale: 1 – The best the medium can offer; 2 – Very good; 3 – Good; 4 – Average; 5 – A steaming pile.
Final Rating: B: Regular readers of this crap know we do not issue the highest mark willy-nilly and we are not going to issue it here. But this was really good, as good a biography as we’ve read and this wasn’t our first.
The Bottom Line: Washington: A Life is highly recommended for general readers. Washington scholars, as well as others well-read in the era, will find it has merit, too. Very well done.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow has a funny incident at the gym. Today’s Diary.
I’d just gotten to my locker after soaking when some broad’s at the door yapping for her husband in a tone that sounded like a sergeant ordering his troops to fall in with the husband – who was a row or two over – answering up in a tone that indicated frequent usage over the years, a clear indication they were not Couple of the Year…
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Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
History’s long march.
In 1377 – The papacy returns to Rome when Pope Gregory XI returns after having left Avignon, France in September 1376. Gregory’s death the following year was followed by the Western Schism, a time when bishops in both Rome and Avignon, and later Pisa, would claim to be popes. Popes had ruled from Avignon since 1309, which followed a period of conflict between Rome and the French crown and Gregory remains the last French pope.
In 1991 – Andy Van Hellemond establishes a new NHL record for most games by a referee in a 4-2 Montreal Canadiens win over the St Louis Blues. It was the 1,173rd NHL game for Van Hellemond, research into whose record he broke was inconclusive and the current mark is 1,904, held by Kerry Fraser, who retired in 2010. Van Hellemond began his NHL career in 1969, retired after the 1996 season and worked 19 Stanley Cup Finals.
In 1981 – John Lennon is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the fourth of five consecutive weeks with Starting Over. It was Lennon’s tenth of 13 Top 40 hits as a solo act or with the Plastic Ono Band, his fifth of eight Top 10 hits and his second of two #1s (Whatever Gets You Through the Night, one week, 1974). The song went to #1 in seven other countries, including Spain and Great Britain and was Billboard’s fourth-biggest song of the year. Lennon had been murdered the month before.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
Sometimes as I sit idly on Walden Pond, I cease to live and begin to be.
Henry David Thoreau
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.
Adolf Hitler was born in Braunau am Inn, in what was then Austro-Hungary and is now Austria.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
How long did the Western Schism last? – Answer next time!
The Daily Dose/Sunday, January 16, 2022
The Daily Dose/January 16, 2022
By Gaylon Kent – America’s Funniest Guy™
The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things.
1. Novak Djokovic – While SB5 pollsters remain “pretty sure” world revolves around Serbian tennis player – just like Djokovic does – they would like to point out he is not a persecuted victim, merely a man of privilege seeking preferential treatment…Fortunately Aussies had good sense to say no and send him home.
2. US Army – Noted military force’s plan to offer up $50,000 enlistment bonuses has piqued interest at SB5 headquarters, though since SB5 pollsters only skill – technical or otherwise – remains Bar Tab Maintenance, they “strongly suspect” US Army interest in this talent could be anywhere for “low” to “rock bottom”>
3. Donald Trump – The 3-hole staple…Instead of being banished in shame for leading the January 6 insurrection, instead of being reviled for the blood on his hands for an inept coronavirus response, instead of being dismissed for believing the moon is part Mars and that Revolution was won by securing British airports, ignorant blatherskite continually heralded as the pacesetter for the 2024 GOP nomination.
4. NFL – Game officials, hardly for first time, bringing A game to postseason as inadvertent whistle on Bengal touchdown not only a(nother) blown call, but so was NFL insisting inadvertent whistle happened after play when even Stevie Wonder could tell it happened during play.
5. NFL II – While Super Bowl halftime shows will continue to resemble police lineups, TV ratings up 10% this season, with 17 million people watching average NFL game…Note to major league baseball: this is 3 million more viewers than watched final game of your most recent World Series, so it’s OK not to worry about ending your lockout.
Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually.
Q: Is it Read Free Sunday at The Diary?
A: Of course it is.
The Diary of a Nobody – Sparrow runs into more Post-It Notes in the shred pile. Today’s Diary.
Which begs the question: which dangerous arch-criminal does this relatively useless information need to kept from???…
———
Click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available.
Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device.
———
On This Date
History’s long march.
In 1945 – German Chancellor Adolf Hitler moves into his underground bunker, known as the Fuhrerbunker, in central Berlin. The bunker was 28 feet underground and its cement roof was almost 10 feet thick, though because it was below the water table water had to be continually pumped out and Hitler stayed in the bunker until his suicide on April 30. The buildings above the bunker were torn down with the bunker mostly destroyed, though some hallways – still closed to the public – remain.
In 1972 – The Dallas Cowboys defeat the Miami Dolphins 24-3 in Super Bowl VI at Tulane Stadium in New Orleans, their first of five Super Bowl wins. The national anthem was sung by the Air Force Academy Chorale and the halftime show was a tribute to Al Hirt. It was the second of three Super Bowls at Tulane Stadium before the Superdome opened in 1975 and the game remains the only Super Bowl played by teams from states that were members of the Confederacy during the Civil War.
In 1971 – Lynn Anderson is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the fourth of five consecutive weeks with Rose Garden. The song also went #1 country in Canada and peaked at #3 in both Great Britain and on the Hot 100. It was the sixth Top 10 country hit for Anderson and her first of four country #1s. The song was written by Joe South and has been recorded many times, including a version by Martina McBride which peaked at #18 on the country chart in 2005.
Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever.
…motion was life. All men must climb, particularly those born at the top who must make the fascinating but perilous journey down.
Gore Vidal
Washington, D.C.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.
The second and final Billboard soul chart #1 for Paul McCartney was FourFiveSeconds, with Rihana and Kanye West, which spent seven weeks at #1 in 2015.
Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard.
Where was Adolf Hitler born? – Answer next time!
The Diary of a Nobody/January 15
Indeed, it’s Read Free Sunday at The Diary.
It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…
Saturday. January 15
Every now and then you run into baffling behavior from your co-workers…Recall Wednesday, my last shift before days off, there were 55 pennies in one drawer and 65 in the other, a rare enuff occurrence when a roll of pennies has 50 in them…Also recall that ol’ Sparrow bagged up 50 pennies in each drawer, leaving the remainder in the trays.