The Daily Dose/February 1, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off is working on their Super Bowl prop bets. It will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  Sparrow gets a crank call at work, though he cannot figure out why. Today’s Diary. 

But who, for what reason and to what end???…Is there some notorious group of hotel front desk crank callers in a boiler room somewhere getting their jollies leaving halfwit messages for non-existent guests, because that’s what this guy was, a non-existent guest; there wasn’t a reservation for a David Smith today…Still, tho, I typed the message up, printed it out and left it for Tammy, who found it as funny as I did.  

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———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1964 – The British Invasion begins when the Beatles are at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of seven consecutive weeks with I Want To Hold Your Hand. The song went to #1 in many other countries including Norway and Great Britain, was Billboard’s #1 song of the year, its fifth-biggest of the decade and ranked 48th on their 60th Anniversary Hot 100 in 2018. It was the first of a Hot 100-record 20 #1 songs for the group and remains one of the great lines of demarcation in chart and cultural history. 

In 1970 – Terry Sawchuck of the New York Rangers records his 103rd and final NHL shutout in a 6-0 win over the Pittsburgh Penguins. The mark is an NHL record that Sawchuck had held since breaking George Hainsworth’s mark of 94 during the 1962-63 season and the record is now held by Martin Brodeur, who had 125 between 1991-2015. 

In 1975 – Fire by the Ohio Players is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks. It was the eighth of 28 soul hits for the group, their fourth of ten Top 10 hits and their second of five #1s on the soul chart. The following week, the song spent its only week at #1 on the Hot 100, their first of two #1 pop hits (Love Rollercoaster, one week, 1976). 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

First, were we truly men of courage–with the courage to stand up to one’s enemies–and the courage to stand up, when necessary, to one’s associates–the courage to resist public pressure, as well as private greed?
John F Kennedy
Speech to the General Court of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts
1/9/61

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Alec Connell of the Ottawa Senators had 15 shutouts in the 1927-28 season.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

What was the Beatles’ smallest hit on the Hot 100? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/January 31, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
A ranking of some things. 

1. Super Bowl LV – Aging GOAT in tenth Super Bowl vs young, defending champion in second could either be status quo or the passing of the torch…Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” they have “no effing idea” which, either. 

2. Tokyo Olympics – You know, we can isolate and stay virus-free and athletic events can take place in a bubble environment, but Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters “pretty sure” Tokyo Games will be too confounded a hot mess to be pulled off.

3. Lauren Daigle – Recent 3-hole staple, extends all-time, all-chart Billboard record for most weeks at #1 as single You Say is at top for 116th non-consecutive week…Song now so old five follow-up singles have also hit chart and song peaked on Hot 100 two-and-a-half years ago. 

4. pensavings.com – Proof that Sunday Bottom 5 pollsters will whine about anything – as if further proof were required – is they are peevishly noting that the generic green ink refill did exactly fit Parker Jotter and the ink itself was not particularly bold…Six bucks they’ll never get back, including shipping. 

5. President Joe Biden Fact Check – Though not keeping fact-checkers busy 24/7 like Donald Trump, Mr Biden is keeping a modest staff on their toes, with only one item this week…Click here, for some modest misinformation, from the Associated Press.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  Sparrow asks the tough question at the hotel. Today’s Diary. 

I finally confronted Assistant Front Desk Manager Q about why in the hell he puts his used Post-It Notes in the shred pile…

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1606 – The final executions in what History refers to as the Gunpowder Plot are held in London. The plot was an attempt by a group of Catholics to blow up the House of Lords during the state opening of Parliament the previous November. Four men were led to the scaffold where they either jumped off or were hanged. Either way, they were still alive when they were drawn and quartered like the four who were executed the day before. 

In 1928 – Alec Connell of the Ottawa Senators begins an NHL-record streak of most consecutive shutouts in a 4-0 win over the Toronto Maple Leafs. It was the first of six consecutive shutouts for Connell, who broke the mark of three he had established in the 1924-25 seasons and later tied twice. Connell’s teammates were hardly scoring machines, and the Senators went 3-0-3 during the streak. 

In 1981 – Lakeside is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of two consecutive weeks with Fantastic Voyage. It was the fifth of 17 soul hits for the group, their second of five Top 10 hits and remains their only appearance at #1 on a Billboard chart. The song also peaked at #55 on the Hot 100, their only pop hit. The group formed in Dayton, Ohio in 1969 and was originally known as Ohio Lakeland Express. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

These were, he now assured himself, not thefts in the ordinary sense, but adventures on the journey of the Fool, guided by intuition and governed by a morality that was not to everybody’s taste.
Robertson Davies
The Lyre of Orpheus

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

The only American besides Dan Jansen to hold the men’s 500-meter speed skating world record was Allan Potts, who held it with a time of 42.4 seconds from January 18, 1936, through January 30, 1937.

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

How many shutouts did Alec Connell have during the 1927-28 NHL season? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here. 

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The Daily Dose/January 30, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  Sparrow doesn’t work out, but he does get his hot springs soak in. Today’s Diary. 

…but if Stanko has something, it’s probably best I report for duty on time and that factored into the decision [not to work out] too…Ultimately, yours truly decided it would be best not to face the horrors of the unknown of whatever Stanko needed without the benefit of a nice long hot springs soak. 

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Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1835 – The first assassination attempt against the president of the United States occurs when Richard Lawerence tries and fails to shoot President Andrew Jackson. The attempt came outside the US Capitol, and Lawrence had actually tried to shoot Jackson with two pistols, but both misfired and he was quickly subdued and even beaten by Jackson, who hit him with his cane. Lawrence was found not guilty by reason of insanity and spent the rest of his life in mental institutions, dying in 1861. 

In 1994 – Dan Jansen of the United States establishes a new speed skating world record in the 500 meters at the World Sprint Championships in Calgary. Jansen skated the 500 meters in 35.76 seconds to break the record of 35.92 seconds he had established in December. Jansen’s mark stood until March 1996 when it was broken by Hiroyasu Shimizu of Japan (35.39 seconds) and the record is now held by Pavel Kulizhnikov of Russia (33.61, March 9, 2019). 

In 1982 – Daryl Hall and John Oates are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with I Can’t Go For That (No Can Do). It was the fourth of six #1 hits for the duo and their seventh of 15 Top 10 hits and the song also went to #1 in Canada and was Billboard’s 15th biggest song of the year. The song was also in its only week at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart, their only #1 amongst their 19 soul chart hits. 

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Power always thinks it has a great soul and vast views beyond the comprehension of the weak; and that it is doing God’s service when it is violating all His laws.
John Adams
Letter to Thomas Jefferson

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Cal Hubbard, who played in the NFL from 1927-36 and later umpired in the American League, is the only person enshrined in both baseball and professional football halls of fame. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

Besides Dan Jansen, who is the only other American male to hold the world speed skating record in the 500 meters? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here. 

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The Daily Dose/January 29, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

PLAY BALL: This week it was announced that no one was elected to the baseball Hall of Fame in balloting conducted by the baseball writers. This is hardly the first time it’sm happened and it set off the usual debate about who does and does not belong in Cooperstown. 

Now Hear This: There really should be no debate: Harold Baines is in, so if you were as good or better than Baines welcome aboard. If you weren’t as good as Baines, you don’t belong, though well done on playing more major league games than we did. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Baines of course, was one hell of a ballplayer and if they want him in their Hall, so be it, though it should be noted no one – except for White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf, who had a hard-on for it – was clamoring for Baines’ election and some might recall that Baines himself seemed surprised. 

But boy, if Baines – who once finished as high as 9th in the American League in home runs –  belongs, so do others, including a dozen or so who were left out in this year’s balloting.

Fly In The Ointment: Long-time readers of this crap will recall that Gary Carter used to be our standard for baseball Hall of Fame membership, but times change. Now, some may quibble that Baines was elected by a veteran’s committee, but his plaque is in the same wing as Carter’s and not hidden in a closet, so he is our new standard for Hall of Fame membership. 

The Bottom Line: Baseball Hall of Fame voting now is a joke. Between players on steroids not making it and mere very good players getting in, Hall enshrinement is no longer reserved for the all-time greats. The all-time very goods are getting in now and the entire process is quickly losing its luster. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  There are more plumming problems at The Shire. Today’s Diary. 

Bad timing, too, because at that moment in human history I sort of needed to use the can, but it was something that’s happened before and everything worked out…Regular readers of this crap may – or they not – recall that a couple of months ago there were some troubles and I thought I’d squared them away and was reading in the chair when there a gurgling sound and the whole system sort of belched and overflowed…I strongly suspect this is what happened here because, of course, I was gone…Unless the cat clogged it up, which I doubt, tho she declined comment on the matter. 

———

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1845 – Edgar Allan Poe’s poem The Raven is published in the New York Evening Mirror, causing an immediate sensation and making Poe a household name. Poe was paid $9 for The Raven, a bit more than $300 in today’s money. The poem consists of 18 stanzas of six lines each and while noted for a variety of elements, its literary status is still debated amongst people that do not get invited to too many parties. 

In 1936 & 1963 – The first inductees into the baseball and professional football halls of fame are introduced. Ty Cobb, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner, Christy Mathewson and Walter Johnson are the baseball inductees and `17 are selected for the football Hall, including George Halas, Jim Thorpe and Red Grange.

In 1983 – Mickey Gilley is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the only week with Talk To Me, his 15th of 16 #1 country hits. The song has charted several times, including a 1958 version by Little Willie John which peaked at #5 on Billboard’s soul chart and at #22 on the Best Sellers in Stores pop chart, making the song one of the few that has peaked on all three major Billboard singles charts.

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.
Henry David Thoreau
Walden

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

13 teams have won multiple Super Bowls. The first was the Green Bay Packers, who won Super Bowls I and II, and the most recent was the Kansas City Chiefs, who won Super Bowls IV and LIV. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

Who is the only person enshrined in both the football and baseball Halls of Fame? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here.

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The Daily Dose/January 28, 2021
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience. 

WHERE WERE YOU WHEN…: Today’s On This Date segment features an item on the explosion of the space shuttle Challenger in 1986, one of those moments we all tend to remember where we were when it happened. 

Run Silent, Run Deep…More Or Less: We were in the Navy, underwater on an old diesel submarine called the Blueback somewhere off the southern California coast when a radioman named Scott Brown came into the control room and announced that he had just caught the tail end of a broadcast, didn’t hear everything, but did hear the announcer say they were still searching the Atlantic for survivors. Later, the executive officer got on the horn and filled us in. 

More Warm, Personal Remembrance Stuff: Now that we think about it, we can remember where we were when Columbia disintegrated, too. It was February 2003 and it was the final days of the Harry Wendelstedt School for Umpires in Daytona Beach, just up the coast a ways from Cape Canaveral. We were all seated in the bleachers at Field 1 when Harry stood in front of us and told us what happened. 

Hut, Hut Hike: Like you may well have been, we were watching Monday Night Football when John Lennon died. Dad and I were spared the Howard Cosell announcement, however, because, per Dad policy, the TV volume was turned down so we could listen to Jack Buck and Hank Stram announce the game on KNX 1070-AM, the CBS Radio station in LA. 

Oh, Jesus H: The station broke the news, interrupting the game with the series of tones that told you something big was happening. Dad and I looked at each other and as I recall it was pretty exciting: bulletins like this were exciting in the pre-Internet era. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Like you probably did not, we slept through 9/11. 

The Bottom Line: It’s funny what we collectively remember over the course of the era we’re sharing, the waypoints that mark our American journey. Odds are another event of this sort won’t happen today, but you never know because the fates like to keep us on our toes.  

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody –  At the hotel, Sparrow declines to issue a discount on a weekend rate. Today’s Diary. 

…and without even telling her to bend forward and whistle Dixie gave her the rate the system was asking – which I seldom do: $224.99, plus tax. 

She didn’t like that all and seemed to think she could invoke the divine right of cheapskates because she dismissed the rate out of hand, calling it – and I am not making this up – “inappropriate” and wondered if I “could do better”. 

Well, I could., of course…Regular readers of this crap know rates are not engraved on tablets that are issued from atop Mount Sinai – they’re whatever the hell I say they are – but with that snotty attitude, I’m not budging. 

———

Click here for complimentary chapters of all of Gaylon’s books.
It’s easy reading on any device. 

Columns, books, shopping lists, click here to get in on the laughs.
4Ever & Ever ($8.99) and monthly ($2.99) plans available. 

———

On This Date
The long march to today. 

In 1986 – The space shuttle Challenger explodes and disintegrates after structural failure 73 seconds after lift-off from Cape Canaveral. The explosion resulted in the deaths of five astronauts and two civilian payload specialists and was determined to have been caused by an o-ring failure on the starboard side solid rocket booster caused by cold weather, a circumstance NASA had been warned about. It was the first of two shuttles to disintegrate during flight, preceding the Columbia disintegrating during reentry in 2003. 

In 1996 – The Dallas Cowboys become the second NFL team to win five Super Bowls, defeating the Pittsburgh Steelers 27-17 in Super Bowl XXX. The Cowboys tied the mark established the previous season by the San Francisco 49ers, and the mark was later topped by the Steelers and the New England Patriots, both of which have now won six. It was the third time the teams had met in the Super Bowl and remains the Super Bowl’s most-played matchup. 

In 1977 – The Bee Gees and other artists are at #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the second of 24 consecutive weeks with Saturday Night Fever. The album went to #1 in many other countries including Norway, West Germany and Great Britain, where it spent 18 weeks at the top. Saturday Night Fever was Billboard’s biggest album of the year and its 27th biggest of 1978 and won the Grammy Award for Album of the Year.  

Some Philosophy Crap
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

…the ultimate opponent is the warrior’s own self…To actually overcome one’s own defects is the nature of victory.
Deng Ming-Dao
365 Tao

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Knowledge is power.

Tom T Hall’s biggest hit on the Billboard Hot 100 was I Love, which spent one week at #12 in 1974. 

Today’s Stumper
Match wits with Gaylon. It’s not that hard. 

How many NFL teams have won multiple Super Bowls? – Answer next time!

Go Gaylon! Visit Gaylon on Facebook here.

Share Gaylon! Go!