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The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 12
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy
With the Jets, Cowboys and Falcons all resting up for what promises to be the tightest Bottom Ten stretch run in recent memory, the race for The Dan Henning Trophy saw a shakeup at the top spot, with the Jaguars ascending the throne following yet another clutch road loss.
It’s another Bottom Ten showdown weekend, too, as the Jets return to action against the Chargers and Cincinnati “invades” Washington in two (2) games that promise to have the newly-patented Bottom Ten TitleTrak Radar working overtime.
This week’s fiasco as the nags approach the far turn:
1. Jacksonville Jaguars (1-8; lost to Green Bay 24-20) – Jaguars blow two (2) leads and a tie in 8th-straight loss…Jaguars could make even bigger B-10 splash – as if that’s possible – with blowout loss to undefeated Steelers…Next Loss: Pittsburgh
2. Los Angeles Chargers (2-7; lost to Miami 29-21) – Chargers still in running for B-10 title they could never deliver to loyal, former, San Diego fan(s)…Team really focused on lousy week of practice, as squad faces must-lose game against Jets this week…Next Loss: New York Jets
3. Carolina Panthers (3-7; lost to Tampa Bay 46-23) – Three (3) wins a lot for B-10 medal stand team, but with current five (5) -game losing streak nobody – except for Jets and Jaguars, of course – playing worse football than Carolina right now…Next Loss: Detroit
4. Cincinnati Bengals (2-6-1; lost to Pittsburgh ) – Bengals never in this one, coasting to 22-7 halftime deficit…Bengals can go long way to shedding “can’t lose big one” label with loss to Whatevers this week…Next Loss: at Washington
5. Washington Whatevers (2-7; lost to Detroit 30-27) – Whatevers destroy Lions’ B-10 medal stand hopes with thrilling last-second road loss…With losable games pretty much the rest of the year, Whatevers still in good position for strong B-10 finish…Next Loss: Cincinnati
6. Philadelphia Eagles (3-5-1; lost to New York Giants 27-17) – Eagles easily avenge earlier win against Giants, showing mastery of fundamentals with eleven (11) penalties…B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” Eagles first team in danger of earning NFL playoff spot, B-10 medal stand finish in “like, dude, quite a while and stuff”…Next Loss: at Cleveland
7. NFC East (10-26-1) – With emergence of AFC South, NFC East forced to settle for Ray Malavasi Tiara, issued to NFC’s worst division…Alleged “division” sill favorites for end-of-season Pete Rozelle Award, of course – issued to NFL’s worst division.
8. Denver Broncos (3-6; lost to Oakland, oopsies, Las Vegas 37-12) – Wins over Jets and Chargers huge blemishes on Broncos’ 2020 B-10 resume..Only 3-3 since 0-3 start, Broncos need to break off long losing streak to stay on patented B-10 TitleTrak Radar…Next Loss: Miami
9. AFC South (15-21) – Once and probably future contenders for Pete Rozelle Award – issued to NFL’s worst division – has half of division in Week 12 survey, forcing B-10 pollsters to dust off Marv Levy Broach – issued to AFC’s worst division.
10. New York Giants (3-7; defeated Philadelphia 27-17) – 2020 highlight(s) reel could be called When All The Losing Died in Victory as Giants blowing B-10 medal stand chances with current two (2)-game win skid…Next Loss: at Cincinnati
This Week’s Clash of the Titans: New York Jets at Los Angeles Chargers
This Is Don Criqui Reporting: Detroit at Carolina
This Is Spero Dedes Reporting: Cincinnati at Washington
