The Daily Dose/Sunday, April 21, 2019

The Daily Dose/April 21, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
Celebrating the best of the worst of the week that was:

  1. Donald Trump Supporters – Please stop achieving and maintaining states of arousal on your treasured victory lap while proclaiming President Trump’s exoneration every hour on the hour…He was not exonerated, he was merely unindicted mainly because it is thought a sitting president cannot be indicted.
  2. American Electorate – We elected a petulant, tactless first grader to the presidency…We have an opportunity to do better next year.
  3. Donald Trump – Leadership so brilliant staff members decline to follow orders in order to protect themselves from legal action…Supremely selfish, conceited, Trump continues to show his only concern is himself
  4. Sunday Continental Cup – Sunday B-5 pollsters desire to resuscitate intermittently awarded Cup – issued college team with longest current-season losing streak – thrown into even more chaos than usual when official NCAA stat site shows losing streaks of 109, 107 games, neither of which are accurate as they ignore wins vs lower level collegiate, high school JV teams.
  5. US Drone Strikes – Great week for attacking countries US has not declared war on, as over 500 drone strikes reported in Afghanistan, Somalia and Yemen bring 2019 total to 1,198…Pentagon commanders, Special Olympics board members, issuing pats on back as over 97 percent of total deaths are of adults…US Congress has not declared war on anyone since World War II.  
    Source: Bureau of Investigative Journalism

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodyThere might be some action at the closed-down diner. Today’s Diary. 

The mind, frankly, reels at the possibilities…Will they redo the inside???…What will the new sign look like???…What will the menu look like???…Altho The Wife pointed out we’re eating really well without the temptation of a diner with tempting, calorie-infested food down the street, which, of course is correct.

Click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future. 

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously. 

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1509 – Henry VIII ascends the thrones of England and Ireland following the death of his father, Henry VII. He is best known for having married six times and for initiating the separation of the Church of England from the Roman Catholic Church. Henry VIII would reign until his death in 1547 and fathered three future English monarchs: Mary I, Elizabeth I and his successor, Edward VI

In 2012 – Philip Humber of the Chicago White Sox throws the 21st perfect game in major league (ML) history, defeating the Seattle Mariners 4-0. Humber would make his final ML appearance the following season and his career record of 16-23 are both the fewest wins and fewest losses of any pitcher to throw a perfect game. 

In 1984 – Phil Collins is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now) for the first of three consecutive weeks. Though written by Collins for the film Against All Odds, it was based on a song Collins had written a couple of years earlier, but had never recorded. The song also went to #1 in Canada, Ireland, and Norway and was the first of seven #1 songs for Collins as a solo act on the Hot 100. 

Quotebook
The first thing you felt was that there was a man who spoke honestly about how he felt and was not trying to put something across…(he) made things understandable for the foggiest brain and went to the core of things.

John Toland
Adolf Hitler

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The National League record for most consecutive losses at the start of a season is held by the Chicago Cubs, who lost their first 14 games in 1997. 

Today’s Stumper
How many #1 songs was Phil Collins a part of as a member of the group Genesis? – Answer next time!

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