The Daily Dose/Thursday, May 21, 2020

The Daily Dose/May 21, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience.

USA! USA!: One thing we’ve thought from time to time during the Virus Era is where the hell is Joe Biden, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee? Every now and then we’ll see an ad from him on Facebook, and he appears to have given an online commencement address Wednesday, but otherwise it’s as if he’s in the witness protection program. 

Brave New World: This is too bad, our loss, really, because it’s the third decade of the 21st century and there is no reason for Biden to not be commanding an audience on a daily basis, engaging the battle against a lying sexual predator who believes the moon is part of Mars, who lies constantly and whose only real talent – and interest for that matter – is drawing attention to himself. 

Dry, Technical Matter: Heck, there would have been a time when Trump would not have been elected in the first place. There was a time when a real American press, doing its duty, would have had a blathering billionaire out of the GOP presidential race within a few days after announcing, but those days are long gone. The media escorted Candidate Trump straight to the primaries and then the White House because he meant clicks and ratings, competence and substance be damned. We are now reaping the harvest of President Trump: America remains irrelevant, halfway between influence and oblivion. 

The Bottom Line: Look, few appreciate, demand, courtesy and decorum as much your friends here at The Daily Dose. But this is no time to be measured. Unprecedented times call for unprecedented actions and this is not the time for the presumptive Democratic Party presidential nominee to be laying low. He should be rallying the troops every day, standing up to a lying bully and calling an orange an orange. 

Today At The Site
Writing worth reading. Usually. 

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has computer problems at the hotel. Today’s Diary.  

The big news at the hotel is the computer at the right front desk station wasn’t working…I am not making that up…It’s the station I usually use on the rare occasions when I’m actually at the front desk and I handled this quagmire in usual Sparrow fashion by staring at it crossly with my hands on my hips…After this produced nothing resembling a solution, I came back strong, showing the sort of leadership you’d expect out of a Legion district commander: I immediately retired to the back office and printed the emergency reports and did the usual start-of-shift stuff there.

Click here get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
History’s long march to today

In 2017 – The Ringling Brothers and Barnum and Bailey Circus conducts its final performance at the Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum in Uniondale, New York. The circus had started in 1919 with the merger of Ringling Brothers World’s Greatest Show and Barnum and Bailey’s Greatest Show on Earth and the enterprise traces its roots back to P.T. Barnum’s Great Traveling Museum, Menagerie, Caravan, and Hippodrome, which began in 1871. The circus had stopped using their own big top tents in 1957. 

In 1979 – The Montreal Canadiens win their fourth consecutive Stanley Cup, defeating the New York Rangers 4-1 in Game 5 of the Stanley Cup Finals. It was the second time the Canadiens had won at least four consecutive Stanley Cups (1956-60) and they remain the only team to do so. It was the 22nd Stanley Cup title for Montreal and to date they have won 24, the most in the NHL. Their last title came in 1993 and they remain the last Canadian team to win the Cup. 

In 1978 – Wings is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with With a Little Luck. The song also went to #1 in Canada and peaked at #5 in Great Britain. With a Little Luck had debuted on the Top 40 six weeks earlier and was in its fifth of eight weeks in the Top 10. It was the seventh of eight #1 songs for Wings and was the 27th #1 song for Paul McCartney, counting his time with the Beatles. 

Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

He is half done who has already begun. – Horace (65 BC-8 BC), Roman poet, 

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

The major league record for most errors in a game by a pitcher is held by Ed Doheny of the New York Giants, who had five errors on August 15, 1899. 

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

How many Stanley Cup Finals have the Montreal Canadiens lost? – Answer next time!

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