The Diary of a Nobody/January 8

Q: Is it Read Free Sunday at The Diary?
A: Yes, it is Read Free Sunday at The Diary.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Saturday. January 8
Just when you might be tempted to think the front desk at the hotel was back at full strength, what with the return of Kylie and Front Desk Manager Brandon, BOOM Amy announced tonite that Assistant Front Desk Manager Q will be out for a while…Amy said we were so short on my days off that Chris had to come in at 2000, three full hours before his usual 2300 time which makes for a long nite. 

I wish we would get back to full strength soon because Julie and I are starting to make noises about doing some fine dining again and she would like to go on a nite when she doesn’t have to work the next day…As a practical matter, this means Sunday and while it would be possible to get a Sunday nite off either by switching a nite with Chris or merely taking it off, we’re shorthanded enuff with everyone healthy that it will be tuff to do, so everyone needs to get better right now. 

For being a sold-out weekend nite in ski season, room revenue really lagged, checking in at just a bit more than 22K, an average rate of $172 or so…The problem was it’s what’s known as Texas Week in town, where there are a lot of music events that appeal to Texicans, who come here in droves to freeze their keesters off for the week because none of them bring warm jackets…Now, offhand, you might think this is a great opportunity to gouge them, they all come as part of a package deal, and the rates are pretty reasonable. 

They do spend money, tho…The restaurant and bar did really good business, good enuff, in fact, that the bar was still open when I reported for duty, which is pretty rare…And when the bar closed there were a couple of requests for yours truly to open it back up…One guy, very determined, even had his wallet out with a credit card in his hand…He didn’t call me the warden like that guy last week – a line that still makes me laff – but he wasn’t too pleased when it became clear yours truly could not be budged. 

Ol’ Sparrow was favored with some quality time with Joe the Homeless Guy while celebrating Fast Food Saturday after the hotel…Times aren’t good for Joe right now…(Of course, he’s homeless so I guess they’re never particularly great)…Not only did his preferred sleeping spot face the wind last nite, but he’d also had his backpack stolen – the other homeless guy in town is the lead suspect – and that had his ID in it which is going to make it tuff to buy a bus ticket to someplace warm. 

Joe is deranged…His mind not humming on all cylinders and he sat down at my table like we were old friends and soon enuff he was talking about how he’d invented the game Candy Crush and was Sam Walton’s private pilot and how he was in on the beginning of Facebook but that bastard Zuckerberg stole his information, a matter Joe decided not to pursue which cost him major bank…(This really makes no sense because based on the timeline Joe provided, it would’ve had to’ve happened about 15 years before Facebook was actually founded.)…Also, apparently, every law enforcement agency west of the Mississippi has it in for him because they’ve all beaten the crap out of him at some time or another and his ex-wife and kids, amongst others, had had a contract put out on him and one thing you learn over the years dealing with the deranged is that having a contract put out on them is a common thread…And, in what is hardly the Upset of the Year, drug use is involved, too.  

I’ve learned over the years it’s best to meet these people in their world and not treat them like they’re crackers and we chatted amiably for a while, him drinking his coffee while I stuffed my face…Eventually, of course, there comes a time when a homeowner has to take leave of the homeless…I could have, I suppose, offered him the spare bedroom, but then what???…I’ve lived with mental illness and that is supremely difficult, probably more so if you hardly know the guy, and while ol’ Sparrow wasn’t able to solve all his problems this morning, he did save some face by buying him a McGriddle and some hash browns. 

Sparrow’s Sleep Log: 1000 Saturday until 1630 Saturday…6.5 hours for the week and 47.5 hours for the week, not too bad a total, but hardly the 50+ hours a week that had become the norm.


The Diary of a Nobody is a novel. All elements are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Anything else is a coincidence. 

 It was inspired by the 19th-century British novel of the same name. 

 Gaylon’s books can also be found at The Reading Salon.


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