The Daily Dose/Wednesday, November 13, 2019

The Daily Dose/November 13, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodySparrow delivers a bus ticket to a veteran getting released from jail. Today’s Diary. 

The kid turned out to be older, a bit younger than me, actually, wearing shorts, t-shirt and sandals because that was what he had been picked up in over the summer…It was 12 degrees out and after introducing ourselves and whatnot he said he was going to call a friend and he’d wait here the warm waiting area…I asked him which branch of the service he’d been in and he said Army, 26 years, and the way he rattled off battle sites and VA jargon I had no reason to doubt him…Either he was telling the truth or he’d put enuff work into getting his free bus ticket that further queries would result in my dismemberment…After a few minutes, there was nothing left to do, so we shook hands and I wished him luck and that was that. 

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 12There’s a new holder of the Continental Cup – issued to the team with longest all-division losing streak in NATO – plus the usual nonsense in the race for the ESPNCup. The NCAA Bottom Ten is free to read this week. 

Here are some funny lines from the week’s NCAA Bottom Ten: 

UMess back in natural habitat – the B-10 medal stand – with huge loss to latest crop of Army officer candidates…UMess hurt by pregame Army secretary ruling requiring Cadet defense to impale ball carriers with bayonets instead of tackling them…

Commodores still hampered by turn-of-century decision to merge Athletic, Student Affairs as debate team members sent out to play defense caught off guard while discussing philosophical merits of fair catch rule with field judge.

Football failures blamed on Lutheran trait of not wanting to hurt opponent’s feelings by denying them access to end zone…

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
In 1974 – Ronald DeFeo, Jr kills his parents and four siblings, shooting them to death in their Long Island, New York home. The killings happened at about 3am, after which DeFeo went to work, only drawing attention to the deaths while asking for help at a bar later that evening. Originally DeFeo had implicated a local mobster and had been taken to the police station for his protection, however his story was inconsistent and he confessed the following day and is currently serving six concurrent 25-years-to-life sentences. The events were the inspiration for the book and film The Amityville Horror. 

In 1982 – Ray Mancini defeats Kim Duk-koo by knockout, 19 seconds into the 14th round at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. With the win, Mancini retained his WBA lightweight title. Kim fell into a coma shortly after the bout and died four days later. Among the changes Kim’s death brought on were the standing eight count and the reduction of title fights from 15 to 12 rounds.

In 1971 – Cher is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the second and final week with Gypsys, Tramps & Thieves. It was the first four #1s for Cher as a solo act and the third of twelve top 10 hits, all of which had been preceeded by a #1 hit and five Top 10 hits as one-half of the Sonny and Cher duo. The song also went to #1 in Canada and peaked at #4 in Great Britain.

…how is it that we know any thing…except by the analogies of past experience. What has once happened will invariably happen again.

Abraham Lincoln

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The Mayflower and its passengers were originally headed for Virginia. 

Today’s Stumper
Who did Ray Mancini beat to win the WBA light-heavyweight title? – Answer next time!


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