Friends, we enjoying a day off.

The Daily Dose and The Diary of a Nobody will return Saturday morning.

Thank you for understanding,
Gaylon

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The Daily Dose/November 8, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

In The News
It has long been said that a government is nothing more than a reflection of the people it serves. This is a true statement. It’s been true here in America from before the founding of our republic when haphazard, determined British subjects formed a haphazard and determined government and that declared and then earned their independence.

It’s true today, too, when a partisan, fractured and bickering American electorate re-elected a partisan, fractured and bickering government.

It’s almost funny. In the enormous, almost unprecedented, hype leading up to Tuesday’s election some heralded the 2018 midterms as the most important midterms in American history, thought 1862 Civil War midterms still get our vote. We don’t know about you, but the day after we found ourselves sighing and wondering what all the fuss was about. Sure, the status quo was shuffled around somewhat, but nothing changed, the only think heralded was the status quo. Nothing was getting done under GOP control and the Democrats taking control of the House will certainly not change that.

Friends, our country is dying. Lost in the cacophony of the partisan strife that now attends every aspect of our American experience is the fact America took a flier on making substantive changes to the way we are governed. Nothing is going change; our two most pressing issues – perpetual war and exorbitant spending – will not be addressed. We are going to spend the next two years marking time bringing us two years closer to our country’s collapse because no nation has ever survived perpetual war and mindless spending with impunity.

America will not be the exception to that.

Today at the Site
Sparrow settles into his new gig at Hotel C, dealing a raccoon complaint on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, it was complete annihilation nationwide for his Minor Party in Tuesday’s election.

There is, of course, little I can do for you here…I am both unwilling and unable to do battle with raccoons in a ceiling, or anywhere else for that matter, and all I can really do is apologize and put you in another room…

It’s complete chaos – is there any other kind – in The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 11 with four teams enjoying bye weeks, the rest of the Bottom Ten takes the week off on the field, including Oakland, which ascends the throne after their impressive loss to San Francisco.

3. Cleveland Browns (2-6-1; lost to Kansas City 37-21) – Browns back in natural habitat – the B-10 medal stand – four (4) games into another of their patented losing streaks…B-10 pollsters “pretty sure” if NFL playoffs began today, Browns would not be in them…Next Loss: Atlanta

Editor’s Note: a subscription is required to read The Diary of a Nobody and The Bottom Ten. Click here to subscribe. Click here to read both columns as they ran during Read Free Fortnight. 

Also, rewrites on my forthcoming novel Criminals, Courtesans and Constables resumed and you can read the latest, including an updated character list, here.

Two new characters were introduced this session, The Constable, who is pursuing the main character and Constable, a cat the main character acquires for company.

On This Date
In  1519 – Aztec ruler Montezuma II welcomes Spaniard Hernando Cortez to his capital with great fanfare and an exchanging of gifts. He would later regret this, as within months he is made a prisoner in his own palace and was later killed under circumstances that are not entirely clear, resulting in the end of the Aztec empire.

In 1959 – Elgin Baylor of the Minneapolis Lakers scores 64 points in a 136-115 win over the Boston Celtics, establishing a new NBA record for most points scored in a game. The old record was 63 by Joe Fulks of the Philadelphia Warrior, done in 1949 and Baylor would break his own record the following year, scoring 64 points for the Los Angeles Lakers. The record is now held by Wilt Chamberlain, who scored 100 points in a March 1962 game.

In 1975 – I’m Sorry by John Denver is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for its only week, Denver’s third and final #1 on the country chart. I’m Sorry had also spent a week at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 in September, where it was Denver’s fourth and final #1 song.  Calypso, the B side of I’m Sorry, also received significant airplay and the record is sometimes credited as a double-sided hit.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The Billboard Hot 100 record for most consecutive #1 hits is seven, held by Whitney Houston.

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the NBA record for scoring at least 60 points in a game the most times? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/November 7, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

In The News
Not for the first time, Americans took a flier on making substantive changes to the way they are governed in Tuesday’s elections. People are saying this and they are saying that about what happened but let’s not kid ourselves, we marked time this election, doing nothing of substance.

Sure, the status quo was reshuffled somewhat and the Democrats took control of the House of Representatives but this means nothing because if nothing got done with the GOP in control of the White House and Congress even less than nothing will get done with the Democrats in control of the House. 

It will remain business as usual. Come January, when everyone takes office, our government will be the same partisan, fractured and bickering mess it is now. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either deluding themselves, trying to delude you or, as likely as not, both because our most pressing issues – our perpetual wars and our endless spending and debt – will not be addressed because we didn’t demand it at the ballot box. 

Our loss, too, because if these issues are not addressed America will ultimately be tossed aside the scrap heap of history, perhaps before this half century is out.

Today at the Site
Sparrow loses his Congressional race on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. 

Usually, I’d get some likes and shares and whatnot on Faceplant and Tweeter but this year, no, people were circling the wagons more than ever…The GOP incumbent won and it wasn’t particularly close, either.

Today’s Thought for the Day is an encore from this past summer, writer Dick Francis talking about taking monentous steps.

We can only plan our lives so much and there comes a time when we must, figuratively, leap in the dark to find out what nature and circumstance have in store for us. 

The NFL Bottom Ten will move Thursday, a day later than usual. Apologies are issued.  

On This Date
In 1940 – The Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapses in a windstorm, only four months after it opened. A complete analysis of the bridge’s construction is, thankfully, beyond the scope of this feature, but designers were not expecting heavy traffic, so the bridge was built rather narrow and shallow, factors which led to its collapse. The only fatality was a dog left in a car that declined rescue, preferring to attempt to bite a rescuer. A new Tacoma Narrows Bridge would open ten years later.

In 1991 – Magic Johnson of the Los Angeles Lakers announces he has HIV and retires from the NBA after twelve seasons. Johnson did not stay retired, though, he was elected a starter for the NBA All-Star Game that season, played in the 1992 Olympics, attempted a comeback with the Lakers, and later coached them, and briefly played in Europe.

In 1964 -The Supremes top the Billboard Hot 100 as Baby Love is at #1 for the second of four consecutive weeks. It was the second of five consecutive #1s for the Supremes, tying a record originally established by Elvis Presley and now good for third on the all-time list. The song also made the Supremes the first act from Motown Records to have multiple #1s on the Hot 100 and also went to #1 in New Zealand and Great Britain.

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Abraham Lincoln was a Republican in the 1860 election and a member of the National Union Party, which was, to a great extent, a renamed Republican Party, for the 1864 election.

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the Billboard Hot 100 record for most consecutive #1 hits ? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/November 6, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Editor’s Note: Gaylon is the Libertarian Party nominee for Congress from Colorado’s 3rd District. 

In The News
It’s Election Day today in America of course, a day when a partisan, fractured and bickering country votes on their partisan, fractured and bickering government. There is no other way to describe. Our country is a complete and utter fiasco now, in full if-you-are-not-with-me-you-are-against-me, circle the wagons mode, with a lot of Americans refreshingly unopen to any viewpoint other than their own.

Which makes it hard for a third-party candidacy, like ours, to gain any traction whatsoever. Some carrying a third-party banner into an election like to rail against the duopoly or the media or any number of other things, but really, though, there are two battles that are very difficult to win.

One, this has been a two-party country since before the founding of this republic. Except for President George Washington’s two terms and perhaps, the Era of Good Feelings, when there was one major party, there has only been room for two parties here in America. Third parties are looked at askance, it’s candidates seldom taken seriously. Two, it is human nature to stick with the familiar even if it is not serving us particularly well. These are two very big hurdles to leap over.

But there is going to come a time when we are going to have to because, really, America must do something pretty soon because if three decades of continuous war and mindless debt are left unchecked America will be destroyed from within, tossed aside the scrap heap of history, probably before this half-century is out.

Today at the Site
Sparrow talks about Election Day and past campaigns on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, he spends his entire shift at the retailer on his treasured Aisle 5 even as he avoids wearing the silly hats the retailer is offering its employees.

We were so slow tonight I had fun with the 2145 closing page…Instead of saying “attention retailer shoppers” I said “attention retailer shopper”, singular, because there may not have even been one shopper in the store…It went over everybody’s head tho…There was no uproarious laughter from the front end and nobody commented on it at all, despite the fact it was really funny…They’ll miss me when I’m gone.

Rice! The Owls, in one of the not-so-biggest upsets in Bottom Ten history, take over the top spot after losing to previous #1 UTEP on The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 11. Also, Division III Earlham retains the Continental Cup – issued to the team with the longest all-division losing streak in NATO – and stand back, here comes Rutgers.

10. Big Ten
Mitigating Factors: With lots of practice from dealing with Penn State, Michigan State, Ohio State scandals, once-proud conference able to take latest scandal at Maryland in stride to claim weekly, coveted B-10 Conference of the Week award…Though conference’s Competition Committee still sorting out rules, scheduling details, Big Ten expected to add Sexual Abuse as fully sanctioned sport with initial conference championship tournament tentatively slated for Playboy Mansion.  
New Material Budget Is Still $0.00 I See: Despite outside distractions, conference able to focus and man up for strong .500 record in conference play.

Editor’s Note: Subscriptions required to read the above two features. Click here to subscribe. More or less reasonable rates. 

The Thought for the Day will return.

On This Date
In 1860 – Abraham Lincoln is elected the 16th president of the United States. Lincoln won 18 states, all of them in the north, and earned 180 electoral votes, defeating John C Breckenridge, John Bell and Stephen Douglas. Almost immediately, southern states announced their intention to secede from the Union and the Civil War started shortly after Lincoln was inaugurated the following March. Lincoln was reelected in 1864 and served until his assassination in April 1865.

In 1869 – Rutgers College defeats the College of New Jersey, now Princeton University, 6-4 in New Brunswick, New Jersey. Though the game bore little resemblance to today’s football, it is credited as the first college football game in America. Princeton would win a rematch at home the following week while the third game was canceled amid concerns football was becoming more important on campus than going to class.

In 1982 – Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes are at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 with Up Where We Belong, from the soundtrack to the movie An Officer and a Gentleman. The song would spend three weeks at #1, went to #1 in Canada, Australia and South Africa and won Cocker and Warnes a Grammy Award for Best Pop Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group. For Cocker, it was his only #1 on the Hot 100, while Warnes returned to #1 with Bill Medley with (I’ve Had) The Time of My Life. 

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The other songs that spent at least four weeks at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1972 were: Alone Again (Naturally) by Gilbert O’Sullivan (six weeks), The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face by Roberta Flack (six weeks), Without You by Nilsson (four weeks) and American Pie by Don McLean (four weeks).

Today’s Stumper
What parties was Abraham Lincoln associated with when he was elected president in 1860 and 1864? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/November 5, 2018
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Today at the Site
Friends, your favorite Daily Dose features like In The News, On This Date and Trivia will return. 

Please, do enjoy today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. 

Gaylon

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