The Daily Dose/Thursday, September 12, 2019

The Daily Dose/September 12, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around our human experience…

INSERT OWN LEAD LINE HERE: Rescues are always compelling stories, even, especially, in today’s constant news cycle, and the saving of four sailors from a capsized ship off the Georgia coast made for compelling reading. The sailors, all South Korean, were on a ship carrying cars, common cargo in Brunswick, Georgia, and the ship capsized as it was leaving port, about to head to the open sea. 

Dry, Technical Matter: 20 of the crew of 24 were rescued immediately, three were rescued Monday after rescuers cut into the hull and the final sailor was rescued later Monday night. They survived climbing on pipes to stay dry, complete darkness and stifling heat. The Coast Guard showed their customary expertise and bravery. 

FunFact: An exact timetable for moving the vessel hasn’t been released, though you don’t have to Vasco de Gama to know it won’t happen anytime soon. The ship capsized right at the entrance to the channel, too, conveniently located between St Simons and Jekyll islands. Traffic will resume, but the ship will have to be moved, of course, before traffic returns to normal. 

Is There A Point Here?: We’ve navigated ships in channels before and our question was: how in the hell did the vessel capsize in the first place? It was carrying 4,000 cars and it’s possible some shifted, however an awful lot of cars would have to move to capsize a ship that is more than 650 feet long. Rescue efforts were hampered by a fire, but whether that caused the ship to capsize or was caused after the fact isn’t known. 

It had to be something quick, almost immediate though, because ships do not leave port unless they are seaworthy and not in danger of having its rudder sticking out of the water anytime soon. 

No, I Guess There Isn’t A Point: We will probably lose interest in this story as quickly as everyone else – there aren’t even any decent conspiracy theories to keep us occupied – so do not keep it tuned here for breaking updates. We’re glad, though, fellow sailors were able to put off a horrifying death for a few decades.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodySparrow gets a request for a plate of cookies, and it’s a slow day at the VSO as Read Free Fortnight continues. Today’s Diary. 

The way he said “cookies” also annoyed me and he mumbled, rather pathetically, something about Brandon always setting him up…He pointed to the table where the afternoon cookie ration is kept…I shrugged and said OK, I’ll be right back.

You’re a tubbo that wants a plate of cookies, you’re getting a plate of cookies, dammit…Combined with the leftover fru-fru cookies – the ones named after European cities – there were, easily, 18 or so on the plate and maybe even two dozen…You want cookies, here’s a diabetic coma for you, my compliments…They aren’t that fresh but if you’re eating that many cookies you probably aren’t a connoisseur, you’re a devourer.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

Click here to read The Diary of a Nobody – all entries, past, present and future – for only $5.99

Click here to read the hilarious first two (2) weeks of The Bottom Ten with our compliments. 

On This Date
In 1943Deposed Italian dictator Benito Mussolini is rescued by Nazi commandos from the Italian hotel he had been held prisoner in. Mussolini had been removed as prime minister in July, arrested, and transported throughout Italy to keep him away from the Germans. After his rescue, Mussolini was flown to Vienna, where he spent the night, and then was taken to Germany…Known to history as the Gran Sasso Raid, the rescue took ten minutes and was accomplished without a single shot being fired. He later returned to Italy as leader of a German puppet state in northern Italy and, along with his mistress, was executed in April 1945

In 1962 – Tom Cheney of the Washington Senators, now the Texas Rangers, establishes a new major league record for most strikeouts in a game, striking out 21 Baltimore Orioles in a 2-1, 16-inning victory. Cheney broke the all-time record of 19, which had been done twice in the 19th-century, and modern major league record of 18, which had been done twice in the 20th-century. The major league record for most strikeouts in a nine-inning game is 20, done four times. The record still stands. 

In 1970 – Edwin Starr is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for its third and final week with War, a song originally recorded by the Temptations, who declined to release it as a single for fear of alienating some of their fans. The song also went to #1 in Canada, peaked at #3 in Great Britain and on Billboard’s soul chart and was Billboard’s fifth biggest song of the year. It was Starr’s third of four Top 40 hits and remains his biggest song on both charts. 

Quotebook
[Command of the Good Hope] was, at this stage, the crown of his professional life; and the crown, on its first fitting, seemed weighty and over-ornate and top heavy in its daunting majesty.
Nicholas Monsarrat
A Fair Day’s Work

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Pete Rose’s career batting average was .303

Today’s Stumper
Who holds the major league record for most strikeouts in a game by team? – Answer next time!

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