The Daily Dose/Tuesday, December 3, 2019

The Daily Dose/December 3, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…

YOU WERE GONE?: Sometimes when we take a couple of days off it’s because the brain needs a break from producing two, sometimes three, columns a day. We have a knack for it and Lord knows we enjoy it, but the brain is no different from the body: sometimes you need to do something else. 

Fly In The Ointment: Not this time, though. Our latest reader-depleting break was due to some website changes we were making that were going to take a few days if we continued writing. We didn’t want to wait that long, though. One of the things we’ve learned in the writer’s racket is to trust your instincts, so when we sat down to write The Diary of a Nobody one day last week and every word was like pulling teeth, well, that’s not writing that’s typing and that doesn’t do you or me any good. It was our instincts tell us to get busy with the changes. 

USA! USA! And change we did, redesigning the homepage to this website and the Gaylon For US Senate site and another one we take care of for a fellow writer and I am pleased to report everything went splendidly. We were afraid it might take longer than the weekend but no, we finished it right on schedule. 

Dry, Technical Matter: We think the new homepage here will give newcomers a better idea of what the site is about. We were actually rather pleased with the layout of the old homepage, which had the latest content in reverse-chronological order, but we got some feedback that the side menus where the books were could be confusing. Well, we don’t want confusing we want easy, so now our books are right there, front and center, on Column 2 of the homepage.  

It’s good to be back. Two days off for Sparrow is the longest he’s been away in well over three years and you can bet The Bottom Ten will run as scheduled this week. We hope you like the new layout. 

 Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow finds someone in the can at 0300. Today’s Diary. 

Right after that, I go to use the restroom and I am surprised to see two feet under the door to a crapper…(To make this somewhat embarrassing, I was talking to myself, a common enuff occurrence, when I walked in.)…Christ, it’s 0300, who in the hell besides ol’ Sparrow is using the facilities at a nearly deserted hotel???

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The Bottom Ten/NCAA Week 15 – The Interregnum Poll: Featuring the usual witless social commentary America has grown to know and tolerate. 

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
In 1800 – Thomas Jefferson and Aaron Burr each receive 73 votes in the Electoral College for president, the first such tie in an American presidential election. Jefferson’s opponent in the election was actually President John Adams and Burr was Jefferson’s running mate, however, at the time ballots did not differentiate between a ballot cast for president and one cast for vice president. Jefferson would defeat Burr in the contingent election in the House of Representatives on February 17 on the 36th ballot. 

In 1976 – Fred Brown of the Seattle SuperSonics ties the NBA record for most steals in a game with ten in a 121-112 victory over the Philadelphia 76ers. Brown tied the record that had been established by Jerry West of the Los Angeles Lakers in 1973 and later tied by Larry Steele of the Portland Trail Blazers in 1974. The record was broken 13 days later by Larry Kenon of the San Antonio Spurs who had eleven steals and this mark was tied in 1999 by Kendall Gill of the New Jersey Nets. 

In 1966 – The New Vaudeville Band is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of three non-consecutive weeks with Winchester Cathedral. The New Vaudeville Band was a studio group and when the song became a hit a touring group was formed with drummer Henri Harrison the only original member to tour with the group. The group had other hits and Winchester Cathedral remains their only #1 song. The song also went to #1 in Canada and peaked at #4 in the group’s native Great Britain and Winchester Cathedral won the Grammy Award for Best Contemporary (R&R) Recording, later known as Best Contemporary Song, an award that is no longer issued. 

Quotebook
…the only absolute attainment is absolute abandonment. – Buddha

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Franklin Field in Philadelphia has held the Army/Navy the most times of any stadium that is still standing, 18 times between 1899-1935. 

Today’s Stumper
How many other presidential elections have been decided by the House of Representatives? – Answer next time!

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