The Daily Dose/January 27, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Notes from around the human experience…

Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
Editor’s Note: it’s Read Free Fortnight at The Diary of a Nobody. So go, scoot, click on the link and enjoy the Diary with Sparrow’s compliments.

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow has a decision to make about the coffee packages at the hotel. Today’s Diary. 

Well, it turns out the big packages of coffee only hold 8-ozs and not 9-ozs!!!…I am not making that up…There are two options here: you can either modify the amount of coffee put in so each pot gets one-third of a package or you can use the old fill line and open a new package to supplement the final pot of the old package…I decided – and this may well have been a raw display of my authority – to modify the amount put in each pot so we still got three pots out of a package…

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
Great moments in us. 

In 1961 – The Soviet Union submarine S-80 sinks in the Barents Sea, off the northern coasts of Norway and the Soviet Union. S-80 was submerged and snorkeling at periscope depth when it went too far under and began taking in water through its snorkel valve. The valve designed to shut and prevent further water from coming in had frozen, it’s de-icing system not turned on, and the submarine sank in 640 feet of water. All 68 officers and men aboard died. The S-80 had been commissioned in 1952. 

In 1973 – The UCLA Bruins men’s basketball team establish a new NCAA record for most consecutive wins, defeating Notre Dame 82-63 for their 61st consecutive win. The Bruins broke the record established by the University of San Francisco between 1954-56 and would eventually win 88 straight games, a record that still stands. The streak had started on Jan. 30, 1971 with a 74-61 win over UC-Santa Barbara. The all-time NCAA record for most consecutive basketball games won is 111, done by the University of Connecticut women’s team from 2014-17

In 1968-  Aretha Franklin is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Rhythm and Blues Singles chart – for the second of four consecutive weeks with Chain of Fools. It was the fourth of a record 20 #1 songs on the soul chart for Franklin, a record she shares with Stevie Wonder. The song also peaked at #2 on Billboard’s Hot 100 and earned Franklin the Grammy Award for Best R&B Vocal Performance, her second of eight consecutive such awards. The song was originally written for Otis Redding. 

Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

It is almost a law of history that the same wealth that generates a civilization announces its decay. For wealth produces ease as well as art; it softens a people to the ways of luxury and peace, and invites invasion from stronger arms and hungrier mouths. – Will Durant, The Story of Civilization, Vol I: Our Oriental Heritage

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

France did not win a gold medal at the 1924 Winter Olympics. 

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

Which singer broke Aretha Franklin’s string of eight consecutive Grammy Awards for Best Female R&B Vocal Performance? – Answer next time!

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The Daily Dose/January 26, 2020
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

The Sunday Bottom 5
Notes from around the human experience…

1. US Senate Impeachment Trial – Hey, US Senate the Constitution mandates you conduct a trial, which is an examination of evidence and includes exhibits and witnesses…You are not allowing either, only statements, which is a hearing and not a trial, making you derelict in your duties. 

2. President Donald Trump – Give the man credit, despite impeachment and a US Senate trial, he bravely shows no contrition, insisting on maintaining continuity is his personal habits, continuing to deal in insults, exaggeration and outright lies…He daily exhibits is only real talent – drawing attention to himself – and his greatest gift – allowing everyone to believe what they want. 

3. President Trump Defense Lawyers – This impeachment is not a hoax or an attempt to overturn an election, it’s a substantive, though incomplete, attempt to get the president to answer and account for his actions…Neither the American people nor the history books are being served well by you…You’re getting away with it, though, as the American people are tolerating it. 

4. MLB Sign Stealing – Heads rolled for actions that have been going on since first major league game in 1876 and were merely adapted to 21st-century technology…The Astros and Red Sox just happened to be caught and if you legalize it – or lock up all video rooms during games – and no one’s breaking any rules. 

5. President Trump Fact Check: Special Impeachment Edition: The misdirection and lies continue, this time from the president’s defense team. Click here for the latest. 

Today At The Site
Editor’s Note: it’s Read Free Fortnight at The Diary of a Nobody. So go, scoot, click on the link and enjoy the Diary with Sparrow’s compliments.

The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow fields a phone call at the hotel. Today’s Diary.  

…a cue for him to inform me rates were lower when he’d called a half-hour ago, a trick invented shortly after Bell filed his telephone patent…The only appropriate answer to this is well, you should’ve booked a half-hour ago, but that is hardly in-step with established 5-star service techniques…I was in no mood to hem and haw over this, so I told him I had some flexibility and could offer $179 for tonight, but I had no options for Saturday, a lie, of course…To his credit, the guy recognized when the tablets were coming down from Mt Sinai, didn’t press the matter and hung up. 

Click here to get in on the laffs: Sparrow, The Bottom Ten, the funniest books you’ve ever read. We offer 4Ever and Ever access, or cheapskates can purchase books and columns individually. 

On This Date
Great moments in us. 

In 1962 – Ranger 3 is launched by the United States, a mission to photograph the moon before crashing into it. It didn’t make it. Assorted guidance system errors, the first within a minute after launch, ensured the spacecraft missed the moon by 22,000 miles. Fortune had not been smiling on the Ranger program from the start. Preparations had been problematic as the first two Ranger missions had failed to leave Earth orbit. The Soviet Union in 1959 had been the first country to impact a spacecraft on the moon. 

In 1924 – Charles Jewtraw of the United States wins the 500-meter speed skating event at Winter Olympics in Chamonix, France, the first gold medal awarded at the first-ever Winter Games. The Games were then known as the International Winter Sports Week and were held in conjunction with the Summer Games to be held later that year in Paris. The Games would conclude on Feb 5 with Norway and Finland each winning four gold medals. Canada successfully defended the hockey gold medal it had won at the 1920 Summer Games in Antwerp, the only instance of a Summer Games gold medal being defended at a Winter Games. 

In 1980 – Michael Jackson is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the second of four consecutive weeks with Rock With You. The song also peaked at #7n n Great Britain, was in its fourth of six consecutive weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart, was Billboard’s fourth biggest song of the year and ranked 295th on Billboard’s 60th anniversary Hot 100 in 2018. The song was Jackson’s third of 13 #1 songs as a solo act or part of a duet. The song was written by Rod Temperton, who had also been member of the group Heatwave. 

Quotebook
The wisdom of the ages. Whatever. 

Shepard was heading for the goal he’d kept in sight for nearly a decade – not the moon, but the chance to show what he was made of. – Andrew Chaikin, A Man on the Moon

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
It’s not who you know, but what you know. 

Nike replaced Alcoa on the Dow Jones Industrial Average in 2013.

Today’s Stumper
Cheaper than Trivia Night at the bar. 

How many gold medals did France win at the 1924 Winter Games? – Answer next time!

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