The Daily Dose/Tuesday, May 28, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 28, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
A lot is being made about the number of horses that have died at Santa Anita race track this year. To date, 26 have died, already the track’s highest total of the decade, and there are still twelve racing days left.

Santa Anita has not been standing idly by, either. Though, then and still, completely flummoxed by what is causing the unusually high number of deaths, the track suspended racing for several days in March – after the first 22 deaths – and they have instituted medication limits, provided additional veterinarians, stewards and investigators. The theory that a very wet winter wreaked havoc with track conditions may – or it may not – have some merit.

And it should be noted that horses dying at American tracks is hardly breaking news. In 2018 an average of almost ten horses a week died at American race courses, according to the Jockey Club’s Equine Injury Database. The figure the industry cites is deaths per 1,000 starts, and for the past five years that figure has averaged 1.65 nationally, while Santa Anita’s average has been 2.34.

Interesting is the fact the two-day Breeder’s Cup is scheduled to be held there November 1st and 2nd. It’s billed as horse racing’s world championships and officials are on record as saying they’re considering alternate sites, but only as a precaution; they remain committed to Santa Anita.

It’s a tough call.

On the one hand, there are no guarantee horses won’t break down at Churchill Downs or Hialeah Park or Saratoga or anywhere else they could move the Breeder’s Cup to. And, an inordinately high number of deaths at one track could merely be a statistical aberration.

On the other hand, do you really want everybody holding their collective breath at your biggest event? You probably don’t. This story has people who normally pay no attention to horse racing – like us – paying attention to it. A couple of breakdowns at Santa Anita in November could be catastrophic to an industry sports fans have been ignoring in droves for the last couple of generations.

Now, we’re not PETA members or anything, and we’re not calling for the end of horse racing, but we do own a cat and it is interesting to note that a human sport that had 1.65 human deaths per anything would not be tolerated, but horses dying at that rate is OK. It’s what thoroughbred horses do, though: they run, and us humans bet on them running. And barring three or four of them breaking down in the homestretch of the Kentucky Derby, they’ll still continue to run.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow gives a discount to an Army vet, and he looks pretty sharp in his Navy dress blues for the post’s Memorial Day ceremony. Today’s Diary.

This guy was in the Army, so I announce I was in the Navy, toss the card dismissively on the counter and said no discount…They both laff, of course, and then I say sure, I can take $10 off, tho as we move on the registration process it turns out the rate for their room is actually $124, plus tax so I give Soldier Boy his choice, the discounted rate ($129) or the rack rate ($124) and even he’s smart enuff to take the $124 rate without help…

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1934 – Five girls, who history refers to as the Dionne Quintuplets, are born in Callender, Ontario, Canada, the first quintuplets to survive infancy. Elzire Dionne, who thought she was carrying twins, had already produced five children and would go on to have three more. Exploited by others throughout their childhood, all five left home when they turned 18. The first Dionne quintuplet died in 1954 and two, now 85, remain alive

In 1956 – Dale Long of the Pittsburgh Pirates becomes the first major league player to hit home runs in eight consecutive games, homering in the fourth inning of a 3-2 win over the Brooklyn Dodgers. The streak had started on May 19 and Long broke the record of six consecutive games with a home run that had been done several times. The record still stands and was tied by Don Mattingly of the New York Yankees in 1987 and Ken Griffey, Jr in 1993.

In 1977 – Waylon Jennings is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart  – then known as the Hot Country Singles chart – for the second of six consecutive weeks with Luckenbach, Texas. It was the fourth of 15 #1 country songs for Jennings in America and the seventh of 18 #1 songs on Canada’s country chart and Luckenbach, Texas also peaked at #25 on Billboard’s Hot 100. Jennings is on record as saying he has never liked the song.

Quotebook
…in the long run, success or failure will be conditioned upon the way in which the average man, the average women, does his or her duty… The stream will not permanently rise higher than the main source; and the main source of national power and national greatness is found in the average citizenship of the nation.
Theodore Roosevelt
Man in the Arena speech
4/23/1910

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
One World Trade Center in New York City, at 1,776 feet, is the tallest building in the United States.

Today’s Stumper
What was Waylon Jennings’ biggest hit on Billboard’s Hot 100? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 27

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Monday, May 27
Two guys walked in about midnight looking for a room with two beds…I said sure, we have plenty available and quoted them a rate of $139, plus tax, a rate I pulled out of my ass…I really no idea what we were charging, tho I knew we were only about half full and $139 seemed reasonable for a holiday weekend…One guy asks if I give a discount to vets and I say sure and he produces his driver license, which up here has the branch of the service listed so us vets can get out of traffic tickets…This guy was in the Army, so I announce I was in the Navy, toss the card dismissively on the counter and said no discount…They both laff, of course, and then I say sure, I can take $10 off, tho as we move on the registration process it turns out the rate for their room is actually $124, plus tax so I give soldier boy his choice, the discounted rate ($129) or the rack rate ($124) and even he’s smart enuff to take the $124 rate without help…I present them the registration for signature, noting where they should sign and initial.

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The Daily Dose/Monday, May 27, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 27, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Today is Memorial Day, a day set aside to honor those who died fighting our nation’s battles.

Our family is pretty lucky: everybody we sent to war has come back. This dates back to our 5x great-grandfather Absolam Kent who fought in the Revolution, and Dad and Grandpa – also Gaylon Kents – in World Wars II and I, not to mention uncles on both sides of the family who fought in War II and Vietnam, and my brother, who survived rounding up Iraqi prisoners in Desert Storm, though other battles would later take his life. Perhaps your family has been lucky, too, and had everybody come back. Perhaps not. Perhaps Memorial Day is a sad remembrance for you.

Either way, we’d like to suggest you go out and find a Memorial Day ceremony to take in. Some modest research should turn up one, perhaps a ceremony put on by a local American Legion or VFW post or a parade down Main Street. It doesn’t have to be much and it doesn’t have to take up your entire day, but go do something. We’re betting you will have found it worthwhile to show yourself this was more than just a day off from work.

We can still stuff ourselves into our Navy dress blues, so we will be standing post as the monument sentry in our American Legion post’s ceremony at the local cemetery. It’s one of the most useful things we do each year, though putting on the cracker jacks again reminds you that these are still the most gawd-awful, inconvenient garments in history, probably invented by Satan on the seventh day while Providence rested. The bell bottoms look sharp, but boy, pockets are as infrequent as they are inconvenient and you always end up stuffing stuff into your sock. I did get some suspenders this year, for a sharper look, because while there are 13 buttons on the front of the pants there are not, conveniently, belt loops.

But we whine. A good Memorial Day to all.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a NobodyIt’s sold out at the hotel and Sparrow and The Wife have a productive day in the yard. Today’s Diary.

Ten minutes later the website she booked with called asking the same thing, altho she phrased real fancy-pants like, inquiring if I would be willing to grant the guest the courtesy of a no-charge cancellation…Her tone indicated the fate of the entire western world could be at stake, maybe the entire planet…Well, I hadn’t been granted any more authority in the last ten minutes, so I told her the same thing I told the original caller: they would have to call back in the morning…She tried to charm me into waiving the fee – she even thanked me for taking the call, which was as silly as it was unnecessary – but I was firm and there isn’t a Supreme Internet Commissioner she could appeal to, so she hung up.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1930 – The Chrysler Building in New York City opens, the tallest building in the world at 1,046 feet. Located at the corner of Lexington Avenue and 43rd Street on the east side of Manhattan, it was would be the tallest building in the world for eleven months, eclipsed by the Empire State Building the following May 1. The record is now held by the Burj Khalifa in Dubai, at 2,717 feet.

In 1873 – Survivor wins the first Preakness Stakes at Pimlico Race Course in Baltimore. Ridden by George Barbee, Survivor ran the 1 1/2 miles in 2:43. Prior to it becoming the second leg of the Triple Crown, the Preakness had been run before the Kentucky Derby eleven times and on the same day twice. The Preakness was run at a variety of distances over the years before settling at its present distance of 1 3/16 miles in 1925.

In 1962 – Mr Acker Bilk is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the only week with Stranger on the Shore. The song also went to #1 in Britain, where it remains the biggest selling instrumental hit, and was Billboard’s #1 song of the year. While not the line of demarcation the Beatles drew, Stranger on the Shore was the first song by a British act to hit #1 on the Hot 100 and while Bilk had three other Hot 100 hits, none got higher than #59, making Bilk one of the few acts whose only Top 40 hit went to #1.

Quotebook
A ship does not sail with yesterday’s wind.
Louis L’Amour
The Walking Drum

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Jesse Owens won gold medals in the 100 and 200-meter dashes, the 4×100-meter relay, and the long jump at the 1936 Berlin Olympics.

Today’s Stumper
What is now the tallest building in the United States? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 26

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Sunday, May 26
Busy tonight…We were sold out for the first time since ski season and had all the rooms being renovated been ready we could have sold them, too, and I didn’t get back putting folios under doors until 0200…I had to tell several people, both phone calls and walk-ins, that we didn’t have anything for them.

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The Daily Dose/Sunday May 26, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 26, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Friends, your Daily Dose will return. The Sunday Bottom V pollsters send regrets for today.

Today’s Daily Dose can be read here.

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 25

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The Daily Dose/Saturday, May 25, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 25, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow is quoted in today’s paper, but only once, though he manages to be pretty useful at the VSO. Today’s Diary.

Stanko, as usual, is quoted left and right, and so is McGowan, past commander of our small town post but ol’ Sparrow???…One quote, and it wasn’t even my best one…My name, however, is spelled correctly – never a given with this outfit – and I was correctly identified as district commander, so I really shouldn’t complain.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1979 – John Spenkelink, a convicted murderer, is electrocuted by the state of Florida. Spenkelink was the second person to be executed in the United States since executions resumed in 1976 and the first to fight his sentence. (Gary Gilmore had willingly been executed in 1977.) The book Among the Lowest of the Dead by David Von Drehle provides a compelling account of Spenkelink’s case.

In 1935 – Jesse Owens of Ohio State University ties or breaks four world records in a span of 45 minutes at the Big Ten track and field championships in Ann Arbor, Michigan. In order, he tied the 100-yard dash record (9.4s), then broke the long jump (26 feet, 8.25in), the 220-yard dash (20.3s) and the 220-yard low hurdles (22.6 seconds) world records. In 1936 Owens won four gold medals at the 1936 Summer Olympics in Berlin, and then lost his amateur status when he took some endorsement opportunities in the United States. He worked a variety of odd jobs and eventually declared bankruptcy. He died in 1980, aged 66.

In 1959 – The Battle of New Orleans by Johnny Horton is at #1 on Billboard’s country chart – then known as the Hot C&W Sides chart – for the second of ten consecutive weeks. The following week the song would begin the first of six consecutive weeks at the top on Billboard’s Hot 100, where it would be the biggest song of the year. It was the second of three #1s for Horton on the country chart and remains his only #1 pop hit.

Quotebook
Powell was possessed by ambition, but not the ambition that puts the reward and the success ahead of the achievement.
Robertson Davies
The Lyre of Orpheus

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Roger Connor broke Harry Stovey’s major league career home run mark with his 123rd home run in 1895.

Today’s Stumper
In what events did Jesse Owens win gold medals in at the 1936 Berlin Summer Games? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 24

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The Daily Dose/Friday, May 24, 2019

The Daily Dose/May 24, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
Leading Off will return.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Read Free Week continues! Today Sparrow deals with the continuing Internet outage at The Shire, it’s snowing in town and he still can’t get a decent rumor about what is happening at the old diner in his small town. Today’s Diary.

I asked the ladies at the counter if they’d heard any rumors about the old diner…They shook their heads and said no, they hadn’t heard anything, except that there’s ‘been some activity there” which anyone can see driving past it.

It’s Sparrow, an average man passing an average life.

The drivel simply does not stop: please click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and ConstablesFriends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues. Seriously.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1883 – The Brooklyn Bridge, connecting Manhattan and Brooklyn, opens, the first fixed crossing of the East River. It took 14 years to build, has a span 1,595 feet and is 276 feet high. Approximately 1,800 vehicles and 150,000 cross the bridge that first day and the bridge now has daily traffic of roughly 105,000 cars. The Brooklyn Bridge was the world’s first steel-wire suspension bridge and was capable of elevated train traffic until 1944 and streetcar traffic until 1950.

In 1880 – Roger Connor of the Troy (NY) Trojans hits his first major league home run as the Trojans defeated the Boston Red Caps – now the Atlanta Braves – 8-1. Though he never led the National League in home runs, Connor would retire in 1897 with 138 home runs, the all-time record until broken by Babe Ruth in 1921. Connor also retired as the all-time triples leader with 233.

1975 – Earth, Wind & Fire is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 with Shining Star. The song would spend one week at the top and had earlier spent two weeks at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart. It was the first #1 song for the group and came after five of their first seven singles failed to crack the Top 40.  Shining Star remains the groups only #1 song on the pop chart and was their first of seven #1s on the soul chart. It also won a Grammy Award for Best R&B Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group.

Quotebook
The true leader is always led.
John Toland
Hitler

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The major league record for most consecutive batters retired is 46, held by Yusmeiro Petit of the San Francisco Giants, done in 2014.

Today’s Stumper
Whose all-time major league home run record did Roger Connor break? – Answer next time!

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The Diary of a Nobody/May 23

Meet Sparrow, an average man passing an average life…

Wednesday, May 23
Had a very good workout this morning, easily the best since returning to the gym earlier this month…I was able to up the weights on both shoulders and biceps and between-set squats are now up 25…Recall they had started at ten…In fact, the only holdout in the upping weight department is the bench press, but I was strong enough so that I am going to add a few pounds next time. 

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