The Daily Dose/November 18, 2018
By Gaylon Kent America’s Funniest Guy
In The News In The News is enjoying the day off.
Today at the Site Sparrow puts gel in his hair instead of his usual Brylcreem, there is a major theft at the retailer and the new snow tires get their first test of the season, all on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody.
I completely lost mind, too, and did not wet my hair beforehand!!!…I didn’t shower and usually, I wet my hair, but then I have to dry it so I merely wet my hands, then added a small amount of gel and rubbed my hands together before applying it…I was very pleased with the results…
The Thought for the Day is an encore from last summer, from legendary pool hustler Minnesota Fats, a thought on greatness.
Fats was great himself and like many great men and women they had a great belief in others because they had a great belief in themselves.
On This Date In 1918 – Steamboat Willie, the first cartoon with fully synchronized sound and starring Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse, is released. It was produced by Walt Disney and Ub Iwerks, who had tried several animals for their projects, including frogs, cats and cows, before settling on a mouse. Disney and Iwerks parted ways in 1930.
In 1996 – Chris Bonoil of the Dallas Cowboys ties an NFL record with seven field goals as the Cowboys defeat the Green Bay Packers 21-6. The record had been established in 1967 by Jim Bakken of the St Louis Cardinals and to date has been accomplished five times. The record was broken by Rob Bironas of the Tennessee Titans, who kicked eight field goals in a 38-36 win over the Houston Texans in 2007.
In 1978 – MacArthur Park by Donna Summer is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the second of three consecutive weeks. It was Summer’s first of four #1’s on the Hot 100 and also went to #1 in Canada and on Billboard’s dance chart, then known as the Hot Disco Singles chart. The song was remixed and re-released in 2013 and again went to #1 on the dance chart, then and now known as the Dance Club Songs chart.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question Queen Elizabeth I of England reigned for 44 years, 127 days.
Today’s Stumper What was the first cartoon that had partially synchronized sound? – Answer Next Time!
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The Daily Dose/November 17, 2018
By Gaylon Kent America’s Funniest Guy
In The News More than a week after the 2018 midterms, there are still votes being counted.
Florida – long the American standard bearer in mucking things like this up – continues to set the pace, with an undecided US Senate race and a gubernatorial election whose results weren’t entirely certain until recently. Florida’s 2018 elections were rife with the fiascoes and intrigues we’ve come to expect from them and a manual recount has been ordered for the US Senate race – and the state agriculture commissioner race – with the results due by Tuesday. At least a dozen lawsuits are pending.
In Georgia, the Governor’s race is over, though the Democratic candidate has decided to, of course, sue under a Georgia law that allows challenges based on “misconduct, fraud and irregularities”.
California, Utah, Texas and Georgia still have close US House races where ballots are still being counted, while New York has two of their own. The almost obligatory lawsuits have not been announced yet.
Editor’s note: Not among the undecided races is Colorado’s 3rd Congressional District, where Gaylon ran as the Libertarian Party nominee. It was won comfortably by the GOP incumbent and while Gaylon has yet to officially concede, he has declined to demand a recount.
Today at the Site Sparrow gives a ride to a hitchhiker who needs a shower, plus there’s a leak in the roof at the retailer and the lobby of Hotel B is a complete mess on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody.
It was slow enough at the service desk that Supervisor Maria was able to fill out her cat adoption paperwork…Maria was filling out the employment part of it and put “36” in the space for hours worked per week but zany Sparrow pretended it had asked her age…The line from yours truly:
36!!!…You’re 40!!!
Maria didn’t catch on immediately, but when she did she slugged me on the arm, tho it is true she’s 40…I know she’s 40 – everybody in the tri-county area knows she’s 40 – because she blabbed about it for a week a few months ago.
Dan Duffy, a shipmate of ours in the Navy, has our Thought for the Day, about courage and reward.
We cannot be afraid of the successes and failures that await us. Both may be out of whatever realm we are accustomed to, but the blue chips are worth the work and courage they take to rake in.
On This Date In 1558 – Elizabeth I becomes Queen of England following the death of her half-sister Mary I. Elizabeth was the daughter of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn, whom Henry had executed when Elizabeth was two-and-a-half. Elizabeth I never married and she was succeeded by her cousin James I, who was also King James VI of Scotland. James’ mother – Mary, Queen of Scots – had been imprisoned and executed by Elizabeth.
In 1968 -NBC cuts away from the New York Jets/Oakland Raiders game to air the movie Heidi. As it became clear the game would not end by 7 pm Eastern, NBC’s phone lines became so jammed network executives could not communicate with each other, and previous instructions to air Heidi as scheduled were followed and the eastern portion of America left the game with 1:01 remaining and the Jets leading 32-29. Now known to History as the Heidi Game, the Raiders would come from behind to beat the Jets 43-32
In 2018 – Bebe Rexha and Florida Georgia Line continue their unprecedented run at #1 on Billboard’s Hot Country Songs chart with Meant To Be topping the survey for the 50th consecutive week, the longest any single has spent at #1 on any Billboard chart. Luke Combs remains at #1 on Billboard’s Country Airplay chart for the 4th consecutive week, the longest #1 stint for any song in 2018.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question Of the Top 10 scorers in NBA history, six – Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Karl Malone, Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Wilt Chamberlain and Shaquille O’Neal – played or are playing for the Los Angeles Lakers.
Today’s Stumper How long did Elizabeth I reign as queen of England? – Answer Next Time!
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The Daily Dose/November 16, 2018
By Gaylon Kent America’s Funniest Guy
In The News One of the more fruitless endeavors we can indulge in is comparing sports figures from different eras. That is not going to stop us from doing that today.
It’s fruitless because in any sport where performance can be objectively measured – like track and field – it has been established that athletes can run and jump and throw farther than their predecessors. It would follow that today’s team sports athletes would be better than their predecessors. But we seem to forget this when comparing athletes from different eras.
(The exception to this, of course, is Bob Beamon’s Olympic long jump record of 29 feet, 2.5 inches at the 1968 Mexico City Games, which still stands.)
But we are going to compare LeBron James and Wilt Chamberlain anyway as LeBron recently pass Wilt for fifth place on the NBA’s career points list in an attempt to determine who we would rather have on our team.
LeBron has won three NBA titles to Chamberlain’s two. Both have four MVP awards and LeBron has three NBA Finals MVP awards to Chamberlain’s one. Wilt averaged 30.1 ppg over his career to LeBron’s 27.2.
If the sole criteria were stats Wilt would win hands down because he was a statistical juggernaut. Wilt holds the NBA records for most points (100) and rebounds (55) in a game, and for most career rebounds and his 50.36 points-per-game in 1961-62 is a record that is on our very short list of records that will never be broken. Wilt also holds the NBA single-season record for most rebounds per game with 27.2 in 1961-62. Wilt also led the NBA in assists in 1967-68 making him remains the only player in NBA history to lead the league in scoring, rebound and assists. LeBron has his statistical;
But the sole criteria isn’t stats. An intangible that cannot be measured is competitive greatness – the tendency to be at your best when it is required – and LeBron has given a clinic in this every year. He hasn’t won the title every year, but he hasn’t had the supporting cast.
Given the choice, we’ll take LeBron, though if we wouldn’t whine if forced to take Chamberlain.
Today at the Site Sparrow and The Wife meet some friends at the college in town for their annual holiday dinner, though Sparrow whines because they didn’t make prime rib on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody.
Speaking of holiday meals, we are starting to plan for the real Thanksgiving next week…Marian said she would like a ham and I completely lost my mind and said we should also have deep fried shrimp and shells and cheese and why shouldn’t ol’ Sparrow bake a pie, too???
Well, because ol’ Sparrow has never baked a pie in his life, that’s why…Regular readers of the crap know few are capable of overestimating their own cooking skills as ol’ Sparrow…
The Thought for the Day is an encore from January of this year, author Deng Ming-Dao talking about overcoming ourselves.
You have your talents, too, and those that get on in this world are usually those that have maximized their talents. And those talents don’t have to bring us fame and fortune, either, to ensure a happy life. All we have to do is get the most out of them, because when we do that, what is meant to happen in our life generally does.
On This Date In 1940 – George Metesky, known to History as the Mad Bomber, places his firsts bomb in New York City, at a building used by a power utility. The bomb was found before it went off, as was another the following September. His first bomb that went off came in 1951 and bombings continued through 1956, causing some injuries but no deaths. Metesky, bitter over a 1931 job injury suffered when he worked for Consolidated Edison, was arrested in 1957 after a search of company files. Metesky admitted to placing 32 bombs but was judged criminally insane and admitted to a mental hospital. He was released in 1973 and died in 1994.
In 1957 – Bill Russell of the Boston Celtics establishes a new NBA record when he grabs 49 rebounds in a 111-89 win over the Philadelphia Warriors. The old record had been 38 by Maurice Stokes of the Rochester Royals in January 1956. The single-game record is now held by Wilt Chamberlain (see above), though Russell’s 32 first-half rebounds remain the NBA record for rebounds in a single half.
In 1985 – Starship is at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 for the first of two consecutive weeks with We Built This City. It was the first #1 song for the group that first charted as Jefferson Airplane in 1967 and the song also went to #1 in Canada and Australia and was nominated for a Grammy for Best Rock Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group. Not everyone liked the song, however, and it sometimes appears on lists of the worst songs of the era.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question Before moving to Chicago for the 1921 season, the Chicago Bears were the Decatur (Illinois) Staleys.
Today’s Stumper Of the top ten scorers in NBA history, how many have played for the Los Angeles Lakers? – Answer Next Time!
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The Daily Dose/November 15, 2018
By Gaylon Kent America’s Funniest Guy
Friends, your favorite Daily Dose features – In The News, On This Date and Trivia will return Thursday.
Today At The Site Sparrow has a busy night at the hotel, having to figure out some things he had already forgotten, and then he buys a new battery for The Wife’s car on today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Then he heads for lunch at the Mexican joint in the next county, where he is greeted by a new cook.
I drive it over and I forget her name, but the girl who has always been very helpful was there…I told her what I needed and she took command, even asking if she could install it for me, because she plainly remembered having to install windshield wipers for me…
The Daily Dose/November 14, 2018
By Gaylon Kent America’s Funniest Guy
In The News The number of possible hosts for the 2026 Winter Olympics is down to two after Calgary withdrew its bid, following the rejection by voters in a non-binding election this week.
The two cities that remain interested are a joint bid from Milan and Cortina d’Ampezzo, Italy and Stockholm, Sweeden and neither of these two entries seem entirely thrilled with this status. The Italian government has pledged to contribute zero funding whatsoever, while Stockholm’s new municipal government doesn’t want to bother with the Games, either. Both entries have prior Olympic experience, too: Cortina d’Ampezzo host the 1956 Winter Games while Stockholm hosted the 1912 Summer Games. In fact, Calgary had hosted the 1988 Winter Games.
That nobody is interested is hardly a bulletin. The IOC gave away the 2024 and 2028 Summer Games to Paris and Los Angeles because there was no other interest and it is plain fewer and fewer cities are willing to tolerate the Olympic’s lasting legacies of debt and facilities that only had a two-week shelf life. It’s not going to get any better, either, and we are pleased to present, again, our plan to avoid this problem in the future.
Host the Olympics around the world, the same events in the same place every four years.
Here’s an example of how it would work, using the Winter Games as an example:
The Opening Ceremonies can be held in Innsbrook, Austria. Skiing in the Alps. Hockey in North America. Speed skating in Japan. Cross country skiing in Finland. Those deals where they ride sleds down tracks can be held in Europe, too. Curling in Canada. At the end, everyone can meet in Lake Placid for the closing ceremonies.
Same deal for the Summer Games: Opening Ceremonies and some other sports like wrestling, archery and modern pentathlon in Athens. Big ticket events can alternate continents, but sports people only really care about every four years can be held where they have a long history: team handball in central Europe, field hockey in India, rugby in New Zealand or South Africa and when it’s all over everyone can meet in Los Angeles for the marathon, the basketball and baseball gold medal games and the Closing Ceremonies.
Holding events where there are already facilities in place slashes new construction costs by 99.993 percent. Instantly the Olympics are affordable again, infused with a fresh vitality it could certainly use. Instead of the Olympics gathering in one place, the Olympics could commandeer the entire planet.
Today at the Site Sparrow issues another of his classic lines tonight at the retailer in today’s edition of The Diary of a Nobody. Also, he spends no small amount on the phone with tech support wondering why Internet at The Shire is down and he is so pleased with his service he agrees to take the survey they sent him.
Got another Sparrow Classic Line (SCL) off at the retailer today!!!…I am not making that up…I was at the service desk and a lady came up to check out…She had a kid in the baby seat, a bit older than a year it looked like, but I could not be bothered to reproduce, so what do I know…The line from Ol’ Sparrow:
“Here…Let me scan the kid…They’re one-third off this week…”
Today’s Thought for the Day is from Thomas Edison, talking about astounding ourselves.
[Edison] knew success was nothing more than having the wisdom to know the life you are meant to live, the courage to go and live that life and the patience to see it through to the desired end.
The NFL Bottom Ten/Week 12 will move Thursday.
On This Date In 1971 – Mariner 9, launched by the United States in May, enters orbit around Mars, the first spacecraft to orbit another planet. The spacecraft was launched eleven days after the Soviet Union’s Mars 2 spacecraft, though Mars 2 didn’t reach Mars until late November when it became the first spacecraft to land on another planet. Mariner 9 was shut down in October 1972 and remains in Martian orbit, though it is expected to crash to the surface in 2022.
In 1943 – Sid Luckman of the Chicago Bears becomes the first NFL player to pass for seven touchdowns and more than 400 yards in a game, as the Bears defeat the New York Giants 56-7. The win moved the Bears to 7-0-1 on the season, and they would eventually win their sixth NFL title. Luckman’s seven touchdown record still stands, though it has been tied seven times, most recently by Drew Brees of the New Orleans Saints in 2015, also against the Giants.
In 1952 – The first regular record chart in Great Britain is published on this date, with Here In My Heart by Al Martino the first #1 song. Initially, the chart had twelve positions, would expand to 20 spots two years later and now has 100 entries. Over the years, Elvis has the most #1 songs in Great Britain with 21, while Paul McCartney has the most appearances at #1, 25, counting his time with the Beatles, Wings and as a solo act. The biggest song in British chart history is I Believe by Frankie Lane, which spent 18 weeks at #1 in 1953.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question Conway Twitty’s was born Harold Lloyd Jenkins.
Today’s Stumper The Chicago Bears moved to Chicago in 1921. Where did they play before that? – Answer Next Time!
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