The Daily Dose/April 5, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off: Capsule Hot Springs Review: Indian Hot Springs, Idaho Springs, Colorado
One of the nice things about living in Colorado is there are hot springs everywhere. If you dig enough in your yard, you would probably uncover one and this was the main stop on a day trip my wife and I took to Idaho Springs, an old mining that is not without its charms.

We started off in the pool, which, don’t bother with, it was nothing special…Then we went to the caves, separated by gender, and each with pools that have really hot water in them. I asked, because some potatoes that were also in the water were about done, and the worker said the water was at 110 degrees, not masochistically set by management, but hilariously set by mother nature.

110 degrees is really hot to soak in…You do acclimate to it after a couple of seconds, but it is hot enough so you only have, perhaps, a two-to-three minutes window when it is anything remotely pleasant…Anything longer than that and it gets pretty uncomfortable and prolonged exposure to 110-degree water probably isn’t listed on WebMD’s Top 10 Tips For a Long Life. My wife also forked over for the mud baths, where you go and put mud on you and then rinse it off, which for some reason didn’t appeal to me though she gives it very high marks.

Final Ranking: C. Between the older buildings with locker rooms that could use a remodel and the really average pool, we are giving it OK marks. Still, though, we would have given it a B if the 110-degree hot tubs were more practical, but they really aren’t because you can’t soak in them for longer than a few minutes without discomfort. Also, be advised the state is doing some road work on the street leading up to and passing in front of the entrance, though this did not affect our rating.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow and The Wife take a much-needed day trip where The Wife buys her usual boutique soap and also includes a trip to the hot springs.

Anyway, the water in the caves is really, really, really hot…110 degrees hot which is almost hot enough to where you come out ready to be served with your choice of potato…You get used to it after a couple of seconds but for heaven’s sake don’t move because then it’s uncomfortable again…If you stay still, tho, it’s rather relaxing, at least until you move to leave, then you feel like you’re boiling again…You can’t stay in there forever, of course, but I did do three sessions of a few minutes each.

Click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables: Friends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1792 – George Washington becomes the first president to veto a bill. Washington vetoed a bill that would have changed the method of how seats are allotted seats in the House of Representatives. A few days later Congress, in no mood to override the veto of the Father of Our Country, would pass an apportionment bill that Washington would sign.

In 1984 – Kareem Abdul-Jabbar of the Los Angeles Lakers hits a baseline skyhook in the fourth quarter of a game in Las Vegas against the Utah Jazz, his 22nd point of the night and the 31,421st of his career, making him the NBA’s all-time leading scorer. Abdul-Jabbar broke the record of 31,419 established by Wilt Chamberlain, and he retired after the 1989 season with 38,387 points, a record that still stands. The Lakers won the game 129-115.

In 1975 – Minnie Riperton is at #1 on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the only week with Lovin’ You. The song was co-written by Ripperton and her husband Richard Rudolph and co-produced by Rudolph and Stevie Wonder who, due to label conflicts, is credited as El Toro Negro. While a follow-up hit peaked at #76, Ripperton is one of the few ultimate Top 40 one-hit wonders, an act whose only Top 40 hit went to #1.

Quotebook
If you have built your castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
Henry David Thoreau
Walden

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
Smokey Robinson hit #1 once as a member of the Miracles, with The Tears of a Clown in 1970.

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The Daily Dose/April 4, 2019
By Gaylon Kent
America’s Funniest Guy

Leading Off
The US Supreme Court ruled this week that the condemned inmates do not have the right to a painless execution. They ruled 5-4 in a suit filed by Missouri inmate Russell Bucklew who has a rare medical condition that he says will result in severe pain if he is given death-causing drugs, a violation of the 8th Amendment’s prohibition of cruel and unusual punishment. His suit had been dismissed by both district and circuit courts.

The majority’s opinion was written by Justice Neal Gorsuch, Like you probably did, we read the majority opinion:

As originally understood, the Eighth Amendment tolerated methods of execution, like hanging, that involved a significant risk of pain, while forbidding as cruel only those methods that intensified the death sentence by “superadding” terror, pain, or disgrace. To establish that a State’s chosen method cruelly “superadds” pain to the death sentence, a prisoner must show a feasible and readily implemented alternative method that would significantly reduce a substantial risk of severe pain and that the State has refused to adopt without a legitimate penological reason.

Bucklew’s attorneys offered nitrogen gas as an alternative, but this was dismissed by the district court and upheld by the circuit court. Bucklew was not otherwise challenging the legality of his execution in general, or lethal injection procedure specifically, nor is this a last-ditch appeal based on some halfwit claim of innocence. Bucklew had never denied committing the 1996 murder of a man who had the nerve to be living with his ex-girlfriend.

Fine, then, let’s just line everybody up and slit their throats with a dull knife because if a painful state-sanctioned death does not violate the 8th Amendment we don’t think anything does. In fact, we’ve long felt that death itself is an unusual punishment.

Friends, how much vengeance do we, collectively as a nation, need to extract? Isn’t it enough that murderers are put away for the rest of their lives?

We think it is. The government does not need to be providing painful deaths to old, sick men. Besides, this nation has executed innocent people, which is reason enough to shut the whole system down.

Today At The Site
The Diary of a Nobody: Sparrow is obliged to retrieve two restaurant trays from the hotel, while at the retailer he has a discussion about the merits of cheap birdseed vs premium birdseed. Today’s Diary.

Earlier, a guy came thru with both kinds of birdseed, the cheap five tons for $3 stuff, and primo stuff you need a loan for…I asked him if he noticed a difference in the types of birds each type of feed attracted and he said oh yeah and, in fact, used the cheap stuff to throw on the ground, for what he termed “junko” birds…The fancy birds get the good stuff in the feeders.

Click on the button to read The Diary of a Nobody. $5.99 includes all entries, past, present, and future.

Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables: Friends, my latest novel is now available, for $3.99 until later this week when the price goes up a couple of bucks. Criminals, Courtesans, and Constables is about a nice guy who runs high-class call girls in and out of 5-star suites and throne rooms, collects ransoms and runs from the constables. Hilarity ensues.

Click here to read excerpts and a sample chapter.

On This Date
In 1841 – President of the United States William Henry Harrison dies of pneumonia, a mere 31 days after taking office, the shortest presidential administration in American history. Vice President John Tyler, amidst significant debate as to whether he was president or acting president, succeeded Harrison and, due in no small part to his insistence in the matter, was recognized as president of the United States.

In 1986 – Wayne Gretzky of the Edmonton Oilers has three assists as the Oilers lose to the Calgary Flames 9-3. The first assist gives Gretzky 213 points on the season, a new NHL record, breaking the mark he had established in the 1981-82 season. Gretzky finished the season with an NHL-record 163 assists, a mark he broke earlier in the season with his 136th assist.

In 1981 – Being With You by Smokey Robinson is at #1 on Billboard’s soul chart – then known as the Hot Soul Singles chart – for the first of five consecutive weeks. It was Robinson’s second #1 as a solo act on the soul chart and Being With You also peaked in the runner-up spot on Billboard’s Hot 100. Robinson had also gone to #1 four times on the soul chart as a member of the Miracles.

Quotebook
The only graceful way to accept an insult is to ignore it; if you can’t ignore it, top it; if you can’t top it, laugh at it; if you can’t laugh at it, it is probably deserved.
Russell Lynes

Answer To The Last Trivia Question
The Tampa Bay Lightning have are 60-16-4 this season and join the 1976-77 Montreal Canadiens and 1995-96 Detroit Red Wings as the only NHL teams to win 60 games in a season. They have two more games left to play.

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